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What should i do

102 replies

littlebunty2 · 07/01/2020 16:53

Thirty years ago my parents signed their house into my name, my sister was married to a professional gambler who made them bankrupt I think they were worried that the debt collectors would come after their house. My parents died Mum first then Dad. Me and wife spent a bit on the house over the years keeping it in good condition. My dad said that on his death when I sold the house to give my sister a share he wrote her a letter stating this which the solicitor held and I have a copy. Of course after his death when she found this out was angry because she thought she should get half. I didn't know what to do with the house so rented it for a few years then sold it last year. Now she has suddenly contacted me to say she knows I have sold the house and wants some. My solicitor told her she has no legal rights as its in my name I don't know what to do now, I had earmarked the money for certain things, I haven't seen her in seven years and she has no legal entitlement to any of the proceeds of the sale She is divorced from the gambler

OP posts:
MrMeSeeks · 08/01/2020 07:43

i didn’t answer as i thought this would be gone, but how can you think this is ok?
These were your dads wishes, he would be ashamed ( as should you) of what you are doing to your sister.
Don’t use your kids as way to justify it, your dad gave you clear instructions.
Do the right thing.
If not, i hope your sister does take you to court. I really can’t understand how you think this is ok?Sad

DianaT1969 · 08/01/2020 08:16

Wow! Your sister has some bad men in her life.
I feel sick reading that you are giving her share to your children for their future property. Earn your own money to leave to your DC for property.
Disgusting behaviour.
You already earned rental income for 2 years. Give her the half which is morally hers.
If you go ahead with this, I do hope karma hits.

19lottie82 · 08/01/2020 11:07

their grandparents would have wanted my
children to get on the property ladder

No, their grandparents want half of the property to go to your sister. That’s why they wrote the letter. Hmm

Pilot12 · 08/01/2020 11:26

Why don't you divide the money equally between your children and your sister, that way your sister gets a "share" and the Grandchildren get help getting on the property ladder. It sounds like you don't need the money yourself so your children are getting your share.

Your Dad said he wanted your sister to have a share so you should respect his wishes. Your sister could take you to court and ask a judge to decide, then you'll loose a large sum of the money in legal fees.

How would you feel if you died and your children decided to ignore your wishes.

littlebunty2 · 08/01/2020 18:42

I spent money refurbishing the house before I rented it out. Its not my main address so have paid capital gains tax. The amount my father asked me to give her is less then a quarter of the price it sold for. I have checked today with my solicitor the letter is not legal as the house legally mine. To be honest my father said that he should have left it to my children. We haven't spoken for seven years its a long time. This money would mean feet on the property ladder for my four children. My sister has since met someone else who has three children. So if anything where to happen to her then his children would benefit not mine. My wife and I have a lot to think over. Its nice to get other peoples opinions on it I will consider everything but am in no rush

OP posts:
MrMeSeeks · 09/01/2020 07:33

Your dad was clear.
If you want your kids on the property ladder then you help them, don’t use this as an excuse.
Let’s hope history does not repeat!

Bluntness100 · 09/01/2020 07:48

Wow, I'm guessing your father trusted you to do right and never imagined you'd steal from your own sister, and that you led him to believe you'd give her her rightful share.

I believe in karma, do what is morally right op, give her her rightful share.

Baxdream · 09/01/2020 07:51

So essentially what you're saying is if you don't have children you don't get any of your parents inheritance?
You are an arse! Give her half

ringme · 09/01/2020 08:15

Of course you’re in no rush 🙄...No doubt you’ll make her wait another 30 years.

And by the way It’s none of your business what she does with her rightful share. It’s not all about You, you, you and your kids 🙄

misspiggy19 · 09/01/2020 08:36

Wow to all the posters saying the daughter deserves half! Er, no she isn’t entitled or deserve half. She didn’t even care for the parents towards the end.

No one is entitled to an inheritance. The father stated for the OP to give some amount, not half.

misspiggy19 · 09/01/2020 08:38

Sister didn’t bother to keep in touch for 7 years and now finds out about the house, comes swanning back and demands money.

Dontdisturbmenow · 09/01/2020 11:11

What suits you doesn't make it morally right. Not one stranger here has agreed with you. So either use this as an opportunity to reconsider your position or ignore it all and accept that nothing you'll say will make people think you have good reasons to be so immoral.

If your kids happen to have better principles that you, they won't want their aunt money to allow them to get in 5hecladdervehich really they should do of their own doing.

SaintGarbo · 09/01/2020 11:43

I do, and will continue to do A LOT more for my parents than my siblings. One sibling wouldn't even need the money but any money would always be split three ways.

YABvvvvU.

Lippy1234 · 09/01/2020 14:06

Why do your DC deserve to get on the property ladder and your nieces or nephews don’t?

Threepe · 09/01/2020 14:45

God I would hate to think my son with do this to his sister , if I had told him to give money after I died. You don’t have to give her half but at least offer some , it was your dads wish

flirtygirl · 09/01/2020 18:30

You need to give her a third or a half. If you don't, I really hope karma comes back to bite you as you would be a pretty crap human being, let alone a crap brother.

There is not lots to think about like in your post, you are just making it that way as you want to give her nothing and pat yourself on the back that you did the right thing.

You should not even be dithering or have needed to speak to a solicitor, this is something you should have sorted out a long time ago. The dithering and time length says a lot about you as a person and it's not good.

flirtygirl · 09/01/2020 18:31

As for the cat, give her her share after that amount obviously but do not use it as an excuse not to give alternative anything. Your children should gain from your share not hers.

flirtygirl · 09/01/2020 18:32

Cgt not cat.

flirtygirl · 09/01/2020 18:32

Her not alternative, bloody auto correct.

PityParty4one · 09/01/2020 18:35

There is not justification for you to not share equally with your sister so stop trying.

It should be split equally. Your parents gave the house to you because they trusted you but it turns out you are not to be trusted.
I hope your sister fights you on this.

IndieTara · 09/01/2020 18:45

Op I do loads for my parents and I'm a single parent. I have 2 sisters who are married one with no mortgage and the other will be mortgage free in 3 years. They are both much better off than me in terms of finance and time availability. They don't do a thing for my parents and never ever visit my grandad. However everything is split equally 3 ways in my parents will as it should be!
Your sister made a mistake marrying her gambler husband. Don't pénalise her further

littlebunty2 · 09/01/2020 19:04

my name was on the deeds of the house for 30 years. Some Eighteen years later he wrote that letter saying he asked me to give her the share after when I felt fit to sell it. I know its seems morally wrong but at that point the house was mine not my dads. This is how my solicitor has explained it to both myself and sister. Cant anyone see my point of view its a lot of money so a hard decison

OP posts:
confusedandemployed · 09/01/2020 19:10

No no no no no don't be a cunt all your life mate.

Regardless of what your solicitor said, you know as well as everyone else, that morally you owe your sister. If you're looking for affirmation of your arseholery you've come to the wrong place.

PegasusReturns · 09/01/2020 19:12

Wow! You and your wife are appalling Shock

fromdownwest · 09/01/2020 19:17

If you have come here for moral redemption then good luck. A real cunt move you are making, that is your sister, who seems to have been through quite the time. Then her brother pulls the ultimate dick move.

Yes she may not have been as helpful as you would have liked in your parents final years, but by the sounds of it, she had her hands full.

I hope that you take a step back and do the right thing, but I doubt you will...