Are you or do you know anyone in poverty?

[Rayn]

Just that really. We are by no means well off and manage payday to payday and might have to cut back on luxuries now and again but we are not in poverty.
However a family member recently mentioned something about going to a food bank and I was shocked. She has always seemed to be ok , rent paid, odd day out etc but nothing flash!

She is a single parent has always worked but due to universal credit and how it works is now having to go to a food bank. I just don't know how it has got to this? Not her fault by any means but FFS it's 2019!

I have a wide range of friends in different financial circumstances but when I think about it more and more are struggling.

With regards to family member we have offered her some money even though we can't really afford it but can't see her in this situation at Xmas.
I know it's in the news all the time about children in poverty but I never really thought about it affecting people who always seemed to manage ok.

Do you think people are too proud to admit they are in poverty. Genuine poverty where they have to go to food banks?

Just might be worth bearing in mind that people won't admit it as feel embarrassed even though it's not their fault. Just feel like I need to help more but don't know how!

You should watch the film 'I, Daniel Blake' ... poverty is the norm in 2019.

My friend is 65 and the sole carer for her granddaughter. Is on UC. She doesn't need to use foodbanks etc. She spends within their means. Doesn't drink or smoke. Her two adult sons however who are also on benefits like to drink alcohol and smoke tobacco. They "need" to use foodbanks. Says a lot.

Yes. Naice middle class area with good employment opportunities, and we have children in school who don’t have decent shoes or coats. More social care referrals last month than in the previous few years. Families are absolutely at the ragged edge.

I do charity work with people who are struggling. I've been doing it for five years, and every year the numbers increase. And it's not just people who smoke and drink, it's families and individuals with disabilities, women who have fled domestic abuse, people who have lost their jobs. If you're living month to month, then even short term unemployment can leave you skint for months, once you're in that situation, it's very difficult to get out of it.

I'd also say that, in most of these cases, they're the most generous people too. Because they know what it's like to struggle (or to have struggled), they want to help others in the same boat.

Ds is at private school (paid for by his dad who he rarely sees - this is his only contribution to Ds upbringing. He won’t pay maintenance and lives abroad so Very little I can do about it) On the surface because of this people think we are doing really well.

I am a single parent and I have genuinely had to choose between food and putting petrol in car to get to work (and if I don’t get to work I won’t get paid) We are surrounded by wealth, but I have walked along pavements looking for coins so I can buy dried pasta. I have asked for Ds to have play dates with people so they will feed him without me having to say we are struggling. To buy his uniform / school shoes I got a contract phone which I then sold at a massive loss so I had the cash to pay for it because my credit rating is so pants I don’t have access to any other lending except pay day loans.

There have been times where we are okay, don’t get me wrong - but when my hours are dropped or I can’t work because Ds is poorly and I don’t get paid, we are so close to going under that it terrifies me. I am desperate to give DS the best start I possibly can, but it’s hard, and no one really knows what goes on behind closed doors.

I have an above average pay job but we still often spend more than comes in every month.

I don’t think I’d have had a 3rd child if I’d have known what was coming financially.

Ninjakittysmellz . That is horrendous.

I think when you are surrounded by affluent people it must make it worse. So your child is getting an excellent education but is suffering in other ways. It's not right!

I think there are situations where it's due to lifestyle choices but this family member has shown me that it is not always the case.

How the hell is she supposed to look forward to Christmas and provide for two teenagers. It is not as though they are young children who would be happy with some choc and cheap toys.
The teenagers are lovely and will understand but not fair that they should go without. Especially as it's a difficult age anyway to fit in.

As well. Just opened my eyes which is a good thing as I am sure alot of people like me will be unaware that it is affecting people whom you may know!!!

@Ninjakittysmellz can you send DS to a state school and use the school fee money to support basic needs?

Well, presumably the father pays the school directly, y'know - so she can't waste his hard earned money on food and heating and petrol for her car...

Ds dad won’t pay maintenance and pays school fees direct. There would be nothing to gain by moving him to a state school sadly. I want Ds to have a good education, I want him to have these opportunities and for him to realise what is available to him if he works his arse off. It just jars with our reality - luckily though Ds is so far unaware. For all there is massive wealth (royalty etc) there are also lots of hardworking families there too. I don’t want to hold him back by my limitations if that makes sense? And no one knows how bad things are behind the scenes, let alone him thank god.

Though I don't know many people in poverty directly it certainly is real which I know through my work. I see it every day.

With regards to your family member with teenage sons, have you any charity shops near you as often I see some really great branded clothes in there for a few pounds they could have couple of nice trendy bits and a few nice toiletries sets, a selection box. Not great, but better than nothing, lots of people donate to charity before Christmas.

I know from personal experience how a few hard months with low pay or no pay can take forever to get back from. We had some difficulty 2 years ago and it took 18 months to get back to where we are now. We had some seriously shit times, not used food bank but still had hard choices to make. I took on a new job and didn't have any work clothes anymore as I had 4 children age 0 to 6 at the time and my sister gave me a bag of her old work clothes. I couldn't have been happier. But times were shit and I could only buy one pair of cheap tights to wear to work and would wash them by hand each night to wear the next shift. I also went without other basics to provide as best as possible for kids.
People are good at hiding this, the only person who knew how bad it was was my sister and I was so grateful for her help. Brought all my girls new stationery to go back to school with thibgs like that really helped.

We aren't now, but my family possibly were when I was growing up. I think we were pretty well shielded from it and never suffered but my mum said it was a real worry at times. We were always fed and clothed, but I was aware that most of my friends seemed to have more newer things, holidays and lived more comfortably (although I suppose a lot of children think that!).
We grew a lot of our own vegetables and fruit and it was treat to go to jumble sales for new clothes - if we didn't see suitable items, we often bought things for the fabric and made them into something else. We had a lot of homemade clothes.
Didn't have proper heating but my dad would cut up fallen trees for firewood. Can remember wrapping myself in a duvet and then zipping up inside a sleeping bag too as it was sooo cold in the night. Occasionally there was ice inside the bedroom window!
My dad at times worked 70 hour weeks so we barely saw him (if he got a day off it would be midweek) and my mum also had a part time job. Not sure how this compared to average but their income was below 10k in the 90's (meant I got full grants for university).

You can't be retired at 65 & on UC

She must be on pension credit
She should still be able to claim child benefit

Yes
Don't drink don't smoke
Can't afford charity shop clothes as too expensive
Just eat eggs mashed potato or cup soups and bread and apple a day so money is there for food and clothes for children
Wish it were different but I am unemployable

Ninjakittysmellz I am wondering how old your ds is. he’ll learn that life isn’t fair, but will appreciate his opportunities and you all the more when he’s older.

Not any more but I have been when the dcs were younger( 20 years ago) so understand. Was familiar with looking down the sofa or in old coat pockets for coins, keeping an eye out for any money dropped on the pavement, once wrote a cheque for a tin of baby milk knowing it would bounce ( the cheque, not the milk!).
And yes, you hide it because you are ashamed. And it eats away at you and you stop living and just exist..and loans and credit cards become how you pay for things and the spiral of debt commences. It's dreadful..but its not restricted to 2019.

Yes, I know quite a few people who are.

@Parking264T1me

You can't be retired at 65 & on UC

State pension age is now minimum 66 and most more than that so you can be on UC at 65. The grandmother is looking after the granddaughter so not retired but on caring responsibilities.

Many people rely on food banks due to either breaks in benefits or badly managed budgets or low wages and high outgoings (debt repayments etc). Check out the debt free forum on Money Saving Expert to see how dire some peoples circumstances are. Those of course who smoke and drink their benefits away are a different story and need to address their addictions rather than prioritise that over food.

Pension credit is now no longer available for any new claim from any pensioner who has a spouse or domestic partner younger than pension age - they have to apply for UC.

The 5 week Universal Credit delay
The monthly payments
The cap on HB portion to less than actual rents
are all DESIGNED to create poverty

to FORCE people into jobs
except that older people, ill people, parents, carers etc etc
cannot go and pick cabbages in a field for 10 hours a day

UC forces everyone into Poverty. I’ve blasted all of MN about my dear friend who has disabled children to care for. They never received their UC payment this month as last month her husband who works full time, was paid a day early as his usual payday fell on a weekend. it’s shocking and so sad. I’ve tried to help as best I can however they have had to use a food bank. I’m especially upset as this could have been me (have DC with disability) however I’m lucky and have good family support network. My friend used to work at the hospital with me but had to give up due to DC, this is not their fault. i can not believe that the most vulnerable people in our society are being treated like this. This is why I will vote labour even tho I dislike JC.

Ivalueloyalty - That payday issue is not really exactly the fault of UC as employers have been advised how to report wages properly and that situation occurs when they don't report properly. I agree there are problems with Uc but I help a lot of people to claim it and manage their journals and a lot doing fine on it. If people find it hard to budget they can request two payments in the month plus people with disabled children will most likely have DLA, carers allowance and child benefit coming in at different points in the month as well. I agree it is far from perfect but does depend on the situation. Also carers who work and earn too much to claim carers allowance can still get a Uc carers element wheras that was never an option on legacy benefits .

Through work I come across lots of people who live in poverty.

Yes - there are some families who make poor choices, but that's easy to say when you don't have to make the choices yourself. It's easy to say when you have been brought up knowing how to budget and knowing how to cook and knowing where and how to shop for bargains and knowing how to use things like Freecycle and charity shops. Everyone doesn't grow p with parents who teach them such things.
A lot of people have lives that are really, really difficult.

The divide between the poorest part of our society, and the relatively wealthy is really, really shocking.
It is a cycle that is difficult to get out of.

No I don't and I live in an area of very high unemployment and drug misuse. DM and Dmil are both retired on minimum income guarantee. Neither are property owners. One has plenty available funds as doesn't drink, smoke or have a vehicle. The other has a vehicle and lots of pets (I mean lots) has no savings but manages well enough. Recently advertised a job part time at £9 per hour. One applicant wanted cash in hand as it would affect her UC so wasn't worth her while actually working!

It annoys me when people berate the poor for frittering money away on alcohol. We are struggling financially, although not nearly as much as others. Having a glass of wine or a beer in the evening is the only way I can destress from our money troubles. And it’s the only thing I have to look forward to.

Not woe is me at all, just pointing out that for some people alcohol is their way of coping with how shit their lives are.