is this the right board for CSA/CMS question/support

[DropItLikeASquat]

as the title says, sorry newly here.
thank you

They should set a hearing date regardless. It's better for you imo if he doesn't cooperate as, in my case, the Judges can and do make adverse inferences.

As Lilly said it's not as formal as a court hearing, and nothing to feel intimidated by. And they should be setting a hearing date regardless of whether he responds especially as you are the appellant. It is possible to have a decision made on the day and only have to attend one hearing. You may be told the decision and receive a written copy- or it may follow later by post.

I guess its just a waiting game now then? Ive decided to cross the bridge when I get to it so to speak. Ive done all I can for the min so best to give my energy to other things for now. Thanks everyone for your responses.

Sounds like you are doing the right things. Also do keep calling the court as you want to get it listed for a hearing even if he chooses not to engage with the process.

ok so reviving the thread for some hand holding really. Im so upset. The ex has written a horrible letter to the court stating that I'm everything under the sun, and this is just a nasty vendetta against him. Ive been crying all day. On top of that I have the police coming around tomorrow because he is accusing me of stalking him. The police officer said he has to investigate every allegation going ahead despite the fact that its running alongside a court case. I'm just devastated that this is happening and I feel like giving up. Im so scared that he will make me look like a completely deranged lunatic. he has told the court that I'm obsessed with him and that my appeal is simply to make his life hell. how long are they going to allow all this mud slinging to go on without him sending in any actual evidence. I just feel so low. sorry I have ranted so much.

OP as hard as it is just ignore what he has written it's only words - the tribunal are not interested. (It could all be true what he's said they're still not interested) getting the police is involved is probably just a deploy to try and make him look good, you look bad at tribunal, blah, blah, blah. It's game playing tactics. You getting upset and thinking of giving up for your son he's winning yet again. He has a legal duty to maintain his child just remember that - massive hand hold and fingers crossed for a hearing date soon.

Thanks for your support. I know ill get through it. I don't even know why I'm shocked anymore or why it hits me like a tonne of bricks. Ive woken up today focused and ready to fight. The police couldn't do it this week so thats actually a good thing as I now have this weekend etc to compile stuff into some sort of order for them to look at and better understand the situation. I just freaked out. but thanks for being there

Glad you feel better OP.
Your ex is probably doing all this to try and cover his web of lies, cover his tracks and May be he has realised the st he has got himself in by one simple lie just so he doesnt have to support his child. He's probably s**g it right now - but hey that's not your problem or your son's. If he was honest paid what he was supposed to you wouldn't even have to be in contact with him everything could just flow through CMS. Stay strong keep focused remember this is not your fault, and please come back and let us know how you get on

OP, I know it's not what you want to hear, but I really feel that the best thing to do for you and your son is to move on. You might feel that you are fighting for him, but the reality is that the stress this is putting you under is probably doing more harm to your son than what £70 a week will get him. If this is what you are due to lose just because this is what it amounts to by reducing if for other children, you must already be getting quite a bit from him, likely to be more than 50% of what your son's costs actually are.

The reality is that you fell in love, you wanted him, got pregnant hoping that would seal your relationship, it went the other way around. Whether he is or not with his ex is irrelevant as it seems clear he is not going to come back to you. You need to move on. You got a son you adore out of it and that's a blessing. He will grow up without a father but if indeed you got pregnant 'by accident' when there was no discussion about having a baby together at this time, then you can't be angry with him for not supporting your decision not to have an abortion.

You need to move and turn the page and you'll feel so much better. Look back at what you've done to gain what? You must have paid a lot of money to hire a private detective, you now have the police coming to you, you are totally stressed about the court and hurt with what you are reading because part of you still hope that your relationship with him meant as much to him as it did to you. It really really is not worth it. Let it go and move on.

Swingofthings £70 a werk May not be worth it to you but it would to me and obviously the OP , cos if she didn't the n obvioisky she wouldn't be putting herself through this.
She doesn't have to prove anything.
If her child's father just told the truth in the first place she wouldn't have to be doing this either.

Swingof, im not quite sure what you are implying with your inverted comma 'by accident', it was no 'accident' but rather a failure of my contraception. My coil had slipped and I became pregnant. I was on the waiting list to be sterilised, however we had discussed our views on pregnancy and TOP etc and he and I were both on the same page (or so I thought) that TOP is not something that either of us would do.
I do not by any means believe that he would 'come back to me', nor would I want him to. If the guy turned up at my house tomorrow begging I would never entertain the mere thought of him being part of my life. This is 100% about my son. I don't NEED the money, and no I don't receive very much at all in the scheme of it really. Due to the mounting arrears, refusal to pay the full amount and other factors I receive £21 per week. I appreciate that in terms of other people receiving nothing I am very fortunate but that isn't the point here.
I am going to just let the appeal go through and whatever the outcome, accept it. if he truly is paying the correct amount then the appeal panel will agree with him, if not then my son will benefit. I don't see this money as mine, I see it as my sons.
he is not exactly know for his ability to tell the truth and I hope that that will shine through if and when the appeal date comes around.

OK, fair enough and indeed, £21 a week is outrageous, but I don't get then how you would get an extra £70 just by proving that he is living with his wife and other kids.

Or is the appeal about more than just this but also proving that he earns more?

yeah its not just about the living circumstances, there're other factors too, I have already partially won the appeal as he was claiming to be paying for another child too who I knew wasn't his child. That part of the appeal was already ruled in my favour. In-fact the CMS backtracked and adjusted the claim in my favour without it going to the appeal date as it was such a blatant lie. each time something is found in my favour they re adjust the claim and the appeal gets redone to exclude the point already addressed. Im 18 months in now and TBH while it is incredibly stressful at times, I know what I am doing is the right thing for my boy. x
thanks for all of your responses. x

With 8 kids you don't have time for stalking

Hi Fuckingit, thats what I told the lovely police officer on the phone. Between shuttling the kids around without a car (hilariously he said he has seen me driving past the house lol), running a home, studying, working etc I barely have time for a wee, let alone stalking pmsl

I'm assuming the 8 kids is a joke? :)

No, OP has 8 kids. That's why I remembered her name, because it's not very common to have 8

its not a joke I have have 7 kids from my marriage and then son with my ex BF.

UPDATE: the police came to see me today and told me the case is not going to go any further. The police didn't even take a statement from me, they just asked what my side of the story was, then asked if I intended to go near him and I said no of course not. That was it and as far as they are concerned the case is over.
I feel so relieved.
Thanks for the hand holding, and practical advice. Police officer concluded in saying that it is right for me to pursue what I believe is right for my son.

and as long as my actions are not exceeding that then I am doing noting wrong in law and the case remains a civil one.

good news OP

UPDATE!
its a long one- sorry guys..
living in my town became unbearable and he just kept on intimidating me so I moved a long way away to another town with the kids and have the support of womens aid with my relocation. It was horrible, I've been so low and all I have had the energy to do is support the kids, hence the silence for a while.
so, my appeal went through but...... before a hearing could go ahead the appeal was stopped because the DWP financial investigations unit had been doing surveillance etc and found that he had lied.
The award was recalculated in my sons favour and was backdated almost 2 years to when he was born.
BEST NEWS EVER!!!!!
however, I found out today that ex-BF is now exercising his right of appeal so back to court we go.
Its just not going to end, he has the right to 3 tiers appeal so were talking years. It took 20 months for my appeal to almost reach a stage that it was going to a hearing so god knows how long his will take.
I have had so much hand holding on here so thank you.
onwards and upwards and here to my new life with the kids!!
Im no longer scared to go to the park or go swimming/ football/gymnastics with the kids for fear I would see him.
Im scared of what my future will bring but so relieved at the same time.
Finally we can just build a life.

Hi OP goodness gracious what a few months you've had. Glad you're feeling better in your new location - that must be great for you and the kids now - not saying the move was easy but you can have a life now.
So with regards to your CMS if the Financial Investigation team have worked correctly what they have put in place should be pretty robust. Yes he was always going to challenge it - he has to have a mandatory reconsideration first, then appeal like you did and wait for the hearing. This is known as a First-Tier hearing. If they agree with what's now in place, it is very likely that will be the end of the road for him. He'll then have to cough up and pay !!
There would only ever be an Upper Tier hearing if the first tier tribunal changed the decision, and there would have to be a very good reason for an upper tier hearing to go ahead, in no way does he have an automatic right to a second tier hearing, in fact the tribunals service have to grant permission to allow this.
Furthermore, there is only a very small % of cases appealed which are then appealed to the Commissioners Office (which is what I'm assuming you mean by 3rd tier). These are usually highly complex and high profile cases. So i wouldn't worry to much about that.
Make sure you ask for your new address to remain confidential from him.
It's a long and frustrating process, if he's not paying regular keep on at CMS about collecting your payments.

Hi @Fizzymama
he's done the MR already but couldn't provide any new evidence so the decision stands which is why he is going to appeal.
he says he now has evidence to prove he's not lying and that the FIU investigation is wrong. He claims that the reason he was there at her house is because his children were poorly so he was being a good father and stayed to look after them. he said he has evidence of doc appointment and a hospital appointment too that he was attending with the kids which is why he never went home to his alleged address and spend 2 consecutive weeks this alleged exP address.
Its just a huge mass of lies but I just hope the judge can see through it. Trouble is that I now live 500 miles away so wouldn't be able to attend a hearing. do they consider that, would they do a video link etc?

Hi OP - a video link can be considered. You need to contact the Tribunals Service and request this. It probably won't be offered automatically.
So is it DWP or CMS that has done some surveillance ? and I would hope that it was over a longer period than 2 weeks.
Anyway don't forget you have all your original information that you had when you submitted your appeal so you should send this as further evidence to the tribunals service once you have received the appeal response from CMS. You can always contact CMS appeals - you're still a party to the appeal and ask for some advice if you wish. If it was DWP that investigated rather than CMS you could as the Tribunals Service to consider asking them to be a Respondent to the appeal as you won't have been privy to their information gathering (only the outcome) the Judge may or may not consider this.