Up to your eyes in debt? Share our glasses and get it into perspective - a does get smaller problem shared

[TalkinPeece]

This new thread is loosely linked to several previous ones on the same topic.

We live in a society that makes it horribly easy to get into debt but makes it incredibly hard to admit you have a problem and even harder to get out of debt.
Everybody is welcome to share problems, ideas, solutions, but not be judgemental please

I am not in debt, any more.
Here is a link to some spreadsheets that might help explain how
SPREADSHEETS-for-Debt-Control-Budgeting-Mortgages-etc

and lots of people use this
YouNeedABudget

The important things to remember are

• yesterday is as past as the Crimean War

( we will not judge how you got into debt, but we will support you on the way out )

• this is an anonymous forum

( we will not tell your employer, family or friends of the reality of your numbers and we are here day and night )

• this thread is about supporting people through the huge mindset changes needed to come out of debt

( feel free to offload all of the feelings that drive you to want to spend, that make it hard to save and that generally make life crap at times, including getting those closest to you to recognise the changes needed )

Join in, bare your soul and come out the other end.
Its worth it.
You are worth it
The long term results for you, your partner, your children, and your friends and family are worth it.

Happy new year!
Name changer here....(was Badders123)
Just to give some encouragement to those of you still struggling...
Our credit card bill is now...0! :)
Our only debts now are our mortgage and my car (hopefully I will be driving this one for 11 years too!!)
We have managed to build up our savings to £2500 and are planning on adding to it each month
This thread really helped
Thank you

I am hugely embarrassed about the amount of unsecured debt I have - so much so I can't bring myself to write it down. I can afford to make the payments at the moment but it still makes me anxious. I am determined to tackle it though. It will take a long, long time to pay off but it starts today. Car loan finishes in 5 months which will give extra per month to other debts. Overdraft and catalogue need to go first I think then chip away slowly at 2 credit cards. Any tips?

Use the tool that talkinpeace suggests at the top of this thread...
Set up standing orders for same amount each month for the credit card etc - amazing the difference not paying the minimum makes!!

Don't be ashamed

But be pro active and good luck x

Hi precious
Welcome to the new you.
Fist things first.
Switch the credit cards and store card to standing orders for whatever you paid this month.

Then make a BIG cup of tea and put the numbers for each card into my spreadsheet (linked in the OP)
and see how much you will save by moving to the standing orders today

Next, work out which of the three (credit card, credit card, store card) has the highest interest rate.
As soon as the car loan is paid off, set up a standing order to each of the cards that add up to the car payment (50:25:25) and that should clear the first one within a year, then hit the next and the next.

While the cards are clearing themselves, download the budget sheet and work out exactly where your money goes
so that this is a once in a lifetime job

but keep posting - we will be here for you.

Checking in. Hello my name is Wheely and I got back in debt after swearing I never would again

I'm working extra shifts to pay it down.

Hi wheely
Well done on tackling the debt.
What are you doing to change your spending habits - do you have a clear budget of what is essential (need versus want) and limit extras to what you can genuinely afford?

Its the weight loss time of year and understanding
deferred gratification
is essential to both money and weight management

Hi all. Hope is ok to jump in and offload. Took voluntary redundancy last year owing to poor mental wealth following breakdown of marriage. Left with nothing. Still not divorced but don't think I'll get much from the proceedings (at a guess, maybe 8K).

Still no job, although I now have a shitty laptop and in better shape mentally so have started applying.

CC debt of circa £6K, plus arrears all over the place of utilities etc. And to make matters worse, my exh 'counter' applied to child tax credits, which of course he wasn't awarded but from some paperwork cockpit they are demanding 5K to be repaid as 'overpayment' (all the tax credits from that year). I'm stressed to the hilt, my hair has fallen out in clumps.

However, I made a very brave (for me) move and tackled the piles of unopened mail etc yesterday and today going to work out my incomings/outgoings and get on to stepchange. Please tell me it'll get better?! From here on in - no more head in the sand for me! Very inspiring reading others tackling their money mountains on here too.

Welcome to the gang calmandbright
Yes, it does get better. But not quickly.
Good call on taking control of your post and bills and the like.

Utility arrears - as a single mum the companies have to offer you a payment plan.
Talk to them and work out what you can afford (offer 1/3 of what you think you can afford and let them haggle up)

Credit card : Standing order time. Stop using it if you can, set up the standing order. Then ignore it while you get your life on track.

Tax credits : Stepchange are your best bet as they really know their stuff and can help you get your current situation under control.

Jobs : possibly look at short term contract work so that you can adjust to the new you in chunks of time rather than all at once.

Thanks talkinpeace. I'm going to hang around while I'm getting back on track, and hopefully absorb some good tips and positivity by osmosis.

I now have a comprehensive picture of my incomings / outgoings (not good! I'm up shit creek!) but I plan to work hard to remedy that. I rang the phone company to see if I could reduce the bill or step down a package and discovered that THIS MONTH is the last of my contract, and the month by month rolling contract would have been extortionate. So I feel like already I've gained a reward by getting my head out of the sand as I can now switch to a cheaper provider and not get shafted

Also rang the dreaded water company. I'm in arrears and have been ignoring the increasingly scary letters and living with a ball of anxiety. But alas, more payoff (literally and figuratively!) in that I have negotiated a cheaper tarif and arranged to pay weekly going forward by DD so I'm not being slammed by unmanageable quarterly bills. Arrears have been put on hold for now (no more scary letters and nightmares of bailiffs ), and I'm hoping to have picked up a job by the time I'll need to deal with it. I will keep in mind the standing order trick for when that time comes.

Still a few more bits to deal with but at least I have partial peace of mind, and feeling really empowered that I'm facing it head on.

Jumping on the job hunting once the DC are in bed - have spotted a couple of jobs online I want to apply for. I'm going to have to shift as my benefits literally do not cover my outgoings (which are all at bare minimum - don't think there's much more wriggle room for decreasing). It's a bit shit actually - how on earth do people live/manage longer term without getting into a heap of debt / problems?!

Thank you for the response

Will get on to step change tomorrow re: tax credits.

Use the standing order trick on the credit card right now ....

If you are paying the minimum on a card by Direct Debit it will take 18 years to clear.
Switch to standing order and that drops to two years
Do it tonight ;-)

And WELL DONE on dealing the utilities so quickly.
If you communicate regularly they will be kinder as court action costs them a fortune whereas debt plans cost them nothing.

Good luck on the job hunting.

Hi everyone

Is anyone thinking about/making long term plans? Or at least trying to!?

Dh and I are 45

I work very pt after being a sahm for a decade. Family commitments and dhs work patterns mean that feasibly I prob won't work full time again - unless I win the lottery and retrain!

I have no pension - I was misold one in the early 90s and the company gave me some money as compensation some years later- I used that to pay for some things for my wedding

Dh has a company pension which is decent afaik

We hope to cut 2 more years off the mortgage in 5 years which leaves 11 years left.

As i understand it in 10 years dh can take 25% of his pension pot tax free and we could use this to pay off the mortgage.

Is that a good idea? We would be 55.

According to the govt gateway website I qualify for a full state pension (i have my doubts about this!!) and dh certainly will (if state pensions still exist by then!!)

We hope to both retire at 65

Thoughts? Advice?

In other news I've opened an Isa for ME and plan to save my paltry wages every month

Progress....😁

mrsreynolds
TBH this thread is more about those with no options other than managing debt.

You would need to do some serious checking as to whether cutting your pension pot by 25% is worth it just for a few years less mortgage.
Better to try to increase earnings and clear it and keep the pension.

What other debt do you have ?

Mortgage
my car for the next 3 years
That's it

Well done : is the car HP or one of the weird rental contracts ?

I've got a management plan in place already with the credit card and currently only pay £1 pm. Once I get cracking with the divorce, I should get enough to clear it all in one go

Hello all

I was a founding member of these threads and thanks to the support and suggestions I am now in a brilliant place compared to where I was - it is possible and I never thought it would be.

Keep going (in a non patronising way) and seriously every penny counts - paid off debt/ not spent that day/ put in a jar etc.

Oh god no it's on HP - like my last one. I had that one for 11.5 years 😁

My sister had one of those weird car contract things...cost her ££££ in the end as her circumstances changed.

Hello Neouf- I remember you! Your story was/is so inspirational 😁

I'm trying to be sensible [hollow laughter] but no doubt we are also in a much better position than even. A year ago

((((( Noeuf )))))))
Wonderful to hear from you and SO SO pleased that you are in a good place

Hello!!!

So my favourite expression that I heard from Gretchen Rubin really applies to being a parent but it works for debt.

'The days are long but the years are short'

Seriously, it will be 2020 soon - before then, so much can be achieved.

Good luck and thank you to TP x

Oh here's an amazingupdate - I'm actually on the premium bonds thread because I have tiny savings!

grin Whoop Whoop dance round the room. WELL DONE

Hello! Watching this thread with interest. Inspired by the debt free stories. Amazing. I posted in similar thread last year but failed to take proper action and started having panic attacks about it all.
Had a rubbish 18 months- bought a money pit of house which took all our savings and then husband lost job. Managed to get through and he is employed again. Have CC debt of shameful amount but am determined to get it payed off. Have moved most to 0%. Have set quarterly targets, chunking the debt rather than trying to view it as large amount. I thought that might make me feel like I’m making some progress? Trying not to spend now and planning ahead to save for expensive months- children’s birthdays, new school uniforms ready for Sept etc.
Am determined. Fed up of feeling sick about it all. I am really sensible with money now, just wished I’d woken up a bit earlier! Need to find ways of making extra income now to get it down quicker!

Anxious
Working out what you owe and planning the repayments really makes a difference.
Are you looking after your head with the panic attacks - yoga / pilates / mindfulness - as anything that reduces your stress levels will help you coolly assess spending needs.

0% cards are cool as you are just hitting the capital. You'll get there.

Thank you TalkinPeace. I did seek help re anxiety and panic attacks. Saw a therapist who helped me with coping techniques. Paid extra off credit card last night. Feeling positive and determined.