If you died, would your 'personal affairs' be found to be in good order?

[Gameboy]

Mine wouldn't... even though I'm mostly quite an organised person...

DH and I were talking about this last night, and commented how, because so much of what we do is conducted online these days, the other probably would have real problems accessing bank account information/ ebay accounts etc.

Do you systematically keep details of all your passwords/ logins for everything?
I sort of do, for some of the more important ones, but it's in a code form which I haven't explained to DH.

REsasonably as I had to sort all this out 2 years ago after my mother died and although she had put a lot of important stuff in one box other things I had to find after hours of searching through lots of mess.

By the way if you are thinking of telling people passwords I think it's better you don't and die without anyone having access because if you tell them for some things like banks then you won't get refunds if there's hacking etc or a risk of that. The last thing we want is people writing down all their on line passwords for burglars to find in a handy accessible file.

Xenia - I agree - that's why I haven't written anything down!

I suppose most banks etc let you access the account once you prove the death, and your role as next of kin etc?

I was also thinking about all the dribs and drabs of investmets/ ISAs/ PEPs and several different penision entitlements too though. WOuld definitely be a nightmare for someone to sift through.

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I don't keep records of passwords, as not a greta idea really. DH knows some of them but doesn't matter anyway. Rest of our affairs are in order and we have wills written with executoers provided. DH is a solicor and specialises in all this, so would go through all the necessary channels and be able to access everything anyway reasonable simply.

One thing I found about 5 months after my mother's death was a hand written note about what she wanted at the funeral etc. Why given she knew she was dying for about 4 months she couldn't have told me it existed I don't know or perhaps she didn't want it and it was written years before. It's worth telling your family if you want a cremation or burial, what hymns you'd like etc. I think my father's made a living will about when and where he'd like to be kept alive but I haven't seen a copy. It's worth telling people if you'd want your end hastened or not so they know in advance and getting an enduring power of attorney signed in case you lose capacity. life policies in trust to save inheritance tax etc

This thread just prompted me to update something in my will and something on life insurance, so thanks. Although expect to die around age 85.

Periodically, I worry about the home porn pics that we did once, when we were young and had time for such things. (Had the developed in Superdrug as well! ) I do worry about parents/offspring sorting through those!!!

Must destroy them!!!

I was very disappointed going through my mother's things not to find any love letters or anything at all risque. I think the main thing that helps the family is to make sure the original will can be found and they know where the deeds of the house are. I sent the older children an email about what there was and where things were last year although I expect they lost it.

I think mine would be in fairly good order
The main thing we have is a list of all the accounts / investments so they can be tracked down

Are you balking at the thought of my home porn pics Fio??? I'll have you know I was thin and gorgeous(ish) when they were taken!!

No, and if i was looking down from above i would be highly embarassed i had been caught out for the slobbish messy fool i am.

Sometimes i actually worry about dying because i don't want my mother to see the state of my house, christ knows what a psychiatrist would make of that pattern of thought.

A will has a specific clause you can have added which puts your wishes re cremation or burial in it.

Good point. Mine does. My mothers details found after death were quite detailed like where she wanted notices of the death posted - we'd done one I think but not the other publication.

i guess this is something i should get sorted, but in trying to be positive i don't really want to think about it.

At the very least make a will particularly if you're not married otherwise things won't go where you want them to go and if your assets are over the inheritance tax limit (most people's aren't) then it's silly not to try to reduce that.

if you are married and havent upated your will since previous marriage does it matter, ie would new dh inherit anyway?

I think about this sometimes when we all go on holiday. What if we all died in a car crash or something and it was left to my mum to sort everything out?

I can't lay my hands on any paperwork when I need it let alone an 80 year old woman. And then the house and the loft and the garage and the shed filled with crap to get rid of.
The years of grease in the kitchen (and the oven eeeek!) and the layers of dust in the bedrooms and all the hair on the bathroom floor. What sort of daughter would I be to inflict that?

I must get this sorted.

OMG, everything is such a mess. No one else could possibly find anything important in this house. Then again, if I was dead, I wouldn't care.

mufti - depends on whether your will was made in contemplation of marriage or not. If not, then your will is automatically revoked at the time of your marriage - so in effect, you have no will.

It is very easy to now be over the IHT threshold, because of property prices. Very easy to do simple tax planning with your solicitor at the same time as your will though.

EPA (enduring power of attourney is also something worth thinking about - even if it does feel to early. means that should you lose mental capavity at any time, you have someone your trust who will look out for you and your financial arrangenents.

painist - you say that, but do you care now if you leave your DH or your children with it all to deal with?

Ours are in reasonably good nick if one or other of dh and I were to go, ie we would both individually be able to find everything/know what was what. If both of us died, then no they aren't very organised. Should do something about it really including updating wills which are still pre-children ( six years on). Part of the problem is we have never been able to agree on who would be the children's guardians.

my paperwork is all in order but DH's is another matter, he doesn't do paperwork.
given that he has a brain tumour it does really all need looking at but if i bring the subject up, well frankly he would be even more depressed than he is now, if however he broachs the subject then we can maybe sort some stuff out.

If you're a single parent with assets it's even more important otherwise your children could be homeless because of the inheritance tax they have to pay on the value of your house.