Finally bitten the bullet and gone through our finances...

[TabithaTwitchEye]

And I'm disgusted. We spend £800 a month on groceries! There's two adults and a three year old who eats nothing! AND we meal plan, and don't eat meat. I'm most ashamed to say that we somehow spend £200 per month on take aways.

Other outgoings (inc nursery mortgage etc) total £1,800 per month

No wonder we have no money

Well at least it's something you can do something about. Stop the take aways for a start and start eating some of that very expensive food that you've already bought.
£200 a week on food for just 2.5 people in an awful lot. Start working out where it all goes.

We just shop in sainsbo's like everyone else! Not friggin harrods!

That amount does include wine. I have a horrible feeling that it's that. We drink far, far too much. Sad as it sounds, once DD's in bed, we struggle to think what else to do. Maybe it's our imaginations that are the problem

I used to shop in sainsburys. Swapped to aldi in the last year and even if I bought twice the amount of food I would normally I'd still spend less than £100. I have been overall very happy with the quality as well.
How much do you pay for a bottle of wine? How much is too much? More than one bottle a day between you?
Do you buy premium brand foods? Expensive ready made products?

Sainsburys is very expensive - we used to do it, partly because we live in an area where there are no Aldis or Lidles. Now we get a morrison's delivery instead, is that an option for you? (I still spend a lot on food but that's because I don't meal plan etc.)

I used to shop in sainsburys too, swapped to aldi 5 years ago and not gone back.

Watch 'Eat Well for Less' on BBC1. There are about 5 programmes on iplayer already. Lots of families who sound very similar to you and me.

Have a look at www.moneysavingexpert.com there's a great tool on there for plugging in how much you spend on uneccessaries. Put in weekday wine and you could probably pay for a holiday a year with it.

Weekend wine is an entirely different matter of course. You need to both want to do it, so plan and have something to look forward to with cash. Also, start saving.

Use leftovers, have a cheap meal one night a week, jacket potato or omelette. Meal plan. Don't throw food away and have a week eating out of store cupboard or freezer.

And start a box set to watch without wine.

On the EWFL programme the other week, the family spent an horrific amount on food. It was things like microwaveable rice pouches that were doing it (instead of measuring the rice out from the bag). I think they spent about £8 on rice for one meal for e.g.

My point is, you can swap supermarkets all you like but a microwaveable rice pouch is gonna cost 10x the real cost wherever you shop so you need to look closely at what you buy.

Tabitha, I used to do the same, three of us, incl toddler. I regularly spent £800-1000 a month on food/wine/absolutely everything.

All fresh, nothing pre made, I used to make massive portions and DH would take leftovers for lunch every day. We called it the 'food factory', there was always a great selection in the freezer.

He works away half the month these days but even factoring that into account I spend less, a lot less these days, probably £500 a month. But of course he buys food while he is away whereas he didn't before.

I didn't actively change anything, but we did have a Tesco open nearby (used to be Waitrose only for 20 miles). I don't buy meat there, go to a butcher but we only eat it two/three times a week at a push.

My shopping is led by offers (but it always was), we never have a take away, live in the sticks and by the time I had bothered to collect it I could have cooked something.

we were drinking too much, so I decided we were going to have one bottle each per week, to cost no more than £5. DH has found it harder than me (he failed to work out that if he drank a whole bottle on Friday night, than meant there was none left for Saturday ) and if I wasn't the one who did the shopping, and refused to let him "just pop out for milk and wine and peanuts and ......", he'd be back up at previous levels of consumption.

But, we started this in May, and I'm not fussed if I buy wine tonight or not. There's half a bottle or so in the fridge (as I was away last weekend, and DH did the shopping), but I'm genuinely not bothered, as one glass will give me a bit of a hangover.

It helps we have a target to save for (next year's holiday is pretty big) so any time anyone says "can we have x?", the rest of us chorus "holiday fund", which helps keep down the unessential spending.

It's 10 quid a bottle, and about seven bottles a week.

No convenience food, I only buy fresh (or frozen) ingredients.

I think the problem is, I have an hour and a half commute each way, so out early, back late. So we'll have some wine and then think sod it, I'm to tired to cook and get a take away (expensive ones, which are "healthier").

Could you batch cook and freeze?

can't you find wine for less than £10?

I drink wine that costs about £10 full price but buy it when its on offer at around £6.

Yep, that £70 a week on wine is the difference between 'reasonable-ish but could easily come down' bills and 'Bloody hell, where did the cash go?'

£70 a week on wine! crikey.
I shop in Aldi, not convenience food. I cook enough on the evening for my lunches next day. I buy one bottle of wine a week, it's Aldi Sav blanc which I love & it's under a fiver.

I'm on my own now with DS and I spend around £35-40 a week. I get shampoo / occasional items at other stores about once a month. We have a takeaway treat once a month. I can't afford anything else.

Do you drink red or white wine? Aldi do a cracking award winning red for £3.69 a bottle. My partner and I switched our shopping from Tesco to Aldi as (he has been made redundant so savings needed!) but use Muscle Foods for meat (always buy an offer pack, never full price). Our shopping has gone from £150 or so per week to around £50/60 and that includes 3 bottles of wine per week plus nappies and wipes that we didn't buy before (ds only a few months old). We eat no prepackaged food, everything is freshly made. I meal plan based on Aldi's veg offers and religiously stick to my list. I'm horrified by how much unnecessary crap we bought. We eat really nice healthy meals too. I would say we actually eat better than we used to.

Is the £200 a month on takeaways in addition to the £800 a month on food, so £1000 monthly food spend, on included so £600 in supermarket, £200 on takeaway?

Either way that's £130 a week just in alcohol/takeaway

HelenF35 can you tell me which wine that is? We like red wine, and always find the expensive ones can be better...

No days off the wine? Even Mondays?!

I think cutting the wine down to a £5 bottle & to, say 3 bottles a week is needed. A half bottle for each of Thursday and Sunday and on Friday and Saturday you can have a whole bottle each day!

Saved (£70-£15) £55pw and improved your health!

I'd be worried about the daily consumption of alcohol. Your body needs a rest, at least switch to every other day if you can.
Drinking every day has probably become a habit. I'd go cold turkey during the week and see if you can manage.

Well, spending £70 a week on alcohol is your problem clearly. Plus the takeaways.
Can't you cook double portions every time you do cook and freeze half? That's what I do sometimes when I make a complicated recipe and know I won't be doing it again in a hurry, because it's massively fussy - but delicious.

We spend £150 a week on food, for 2 adults, 2 teens and a 6yo. That includes everyones lunch. We eat very well, only organic meat, milk, eggs. But we hardly ever have take aways, maybe once every 3 months and that costs about £40-50.
We've cut down on alcohol, don't really drink much atm, only when we have people coming round.

Sounds like the wine is what's pushing the bills up in your case - if you're wedded to drinking nice wine on a regular basis (there are probably health and financial arguments for cutting down, but that's really your choice!), you could consider some kind of subscription scheme like M&S do a wine subscription and there are lots of others. We used to get one, and it was good value for nice wine but you do have to buy a certain amount each month and we just weren't getting through it.

It sounds like you both have long hard days and I can see why curling up with a glass of wine and a takeaway sounds like heaven.

However, if you can cut down on wine and takeaway, at least in the week, you'd probably be £250 - £300 a month better off without really thinking. Which could make a real difference to giving you options about how to live and work. Paying off mortgage earlier, being able to take a lower paid job that is less of a commute, saving for a pension...

Having some stuff in that's really easy to cook might make a difference, so knowing you have the stuff for a stirfry in, or a quick pasta dish (lots of storecupboard pasta recipes out there), or a nice ready meal...

'Cook' stuff is really good, and while expensive is, probably, cheaper than a takeaway. And sits there in the freezer till you need it. I don't know where you live, but if you are commuting through a big railway station then pick up a M&S stirfry deal on your way home. £6 for a meal for 2...

Thanks everyone. Yes, I know it's shit. I know we drink too much and spend too much. I'm feeling very ashamed.