Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Money matters

Find financial and money-saving discussions including debt and pension chat on our Money forum. If you're looking for ways to make your money to go further, sign up to our Moneysaver emails here.

Inherited but don't know what to do with it. Lone parent on benefits.

117 replies

Prosopopeia · 17/10/2014 11:01

I have inherited around £21,000
I would like to hear people's views on what they think is the best way to use it. I'm worried that if I ask for professional financial advice I am going to be talked into investments or something I know nothing about, I am terrible with money matters.

I would also like to add that I have been to hell and back in recent years as both a lone parent and partner of a DV relationship, I have reached almost suicidal lows and am emotionally traumatised to the extent I am barely functioning theses days, I am robotic in action, emotions, everything really. I feel as if I'm walking the planet as a ghost of my former self.

I am a lone parent age nearly 46 with a 5 and 7 year old. I left a DV relationship with the children's father. He contributes £2.50 a week per child deducted from his unemployment allowance. He does have a cash in hand job but doesn't declare it.

I rent privately and have been here 2 years.
I have however lived at 43 addresses since birth, mostly from my 20s, moving around for jobs, change of scenery, so on. I've moved 4 times since having children already.

I am currently not working. Not for want of trying. I am desperate to work. I am taking training courses, volunteering, and so on. I have also just begun driving lessons.

I realise that once the inheritance is available (currently in last stage of DWP potential overpayment of the deceased's pension credit investigation), it will deplete very quickly, as I lose all benefits and will pay my own rent (£525 month) and everything else. I know there's a benefits savings threshold but it's like trying to get blood from a stone calculating how that affects me, and I've asked every avenue, welfare rights advisors to Jobcentre lone parent advisors to the DWP themselves. Nobody can give me a straight answer.

Obviously although it's my dream, I'll never afford a permanent home for myself and the children, even though they can be bought for as little as £85k do-er uppers. But what's the best thing to do with this money? I've never had loans or credit cards (unusual I know) and have always worked in jobs where I'm living hand to mouth really, so never been extravagant. I have a small amount of debt all from utility arrears, a couple of thousand I should think.

I have thought I should buy a car once I've learnt to drive as that would assist my job hunt, but even that feels like a waste of money as myself amd the children are used to walking everywhere or using public transport.

The children will inherit their father's house and belongings in the future (which are quite valuable antiques and specialist electronic equipment) so I am comforted that they have a future nest egg.

After paying off debts, do I invest in ISAs, premium bonds, etc? Do I blow it on a car and holidays and several pairs of Clarks school shoes for the kids currently in Shoezone-disintegratables? Do I share it out with my stepsiblings? (This is my paternal grandmother who died. She is not blood related to my siblings, and only one of the siblings has ever met her). Do I give some to charity? Do I keep it in my bank savings account?

Any opinions are warmly welcomed. The money should be available very soon and I am scared of it - at my lowest debt point I was pinching loo rolls from the customer loos in stores-and to suddenly see it trickling away and to be back at square one again no job, on benefits, no savings, is awful.

I want to make the best use of it. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity. I want to 'earn it'. I want to feel deserving of money that my grandparents worked for. I spent every weekend with my Gran and she was an alcoholic and physically and mentally abusive to me (and her whole family) but it's still important to me that I use the money wisely. I afraid I might fritter it, because I'm bad at budgeting, or will be talked into investments, and so on.

I hope someone can help me see clearly what is the right thing to do.

OP posts:
TalkinPeace · 20/10/2014 12:28

ReallyTired
She is on benefits, she has £21k before paying off debts : not many worthwhile businesses are that cheap
AND
the insecurity of self employment is not for all though I happen to love it

lisucbgiberiocnha · 20/10/2014 14:21

Sorry I don't understand why it's a silly idea. After paying off debts she might be able to buy a small business or franchise. Surely it's best to try and use the money to make a life change rather then just plowing through the cash till it's gone. Many franchises seem to cost about 16k anyway.

ReallyTired · 20/10/2014 14:26

Talking,
Are you suggesting that someone on benefits who had had a hard life is somehow incapable of sucess in somehow. I feel it would be very sad to remain on benefits for life as benefits are a safety net rather than a way of life.

We know nothing of the OP and where her talents might lie or how a bit of training could nuture her earning potential. Perhaps she could a business from scratch if she had skills like hair/ beauty or catering skills.

Lisu idea is brave rather than silly, but somettimes you need to be brave in life.

TalkinPeace · 20/10/2014 14:35

reallytired
I'm merely saying its a too big first step.
Once OP has got a car and a bit more employment experience under her belt then it might be a fab idea
but as single parent of primary school age children, self employment is not for those without resources

strongandlong · 20/10/2014 14:45

You could try the money advice service. They give free impartial advice.

Good luck.

SkylerShah · 28/10/2014 16:20

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TalkinPeace · 28/10/2014 16:49

nice copy and paste from your website Sklyer.
Reported.

SkylerShah · 28/10/2014 17:23

Ha I'm not selling anything. I don't care for that. Does what I said, both on here and in the article on choice not serve Prosopopeia?

Thank you for taking time to respond to my post.

Skyler.

mipmop · 28/10/2014 19:03

SkylerShah- you've been touting your "life coaching" nonsense all over the forum today. So yes it seems like you're trying to sell something.

mipmop · 28/10/2014 19:07

And here's the definition of "sell" in this context

Persuade someone of the merits of:
he sold the idea of making a film about Tchaikovsky
he just won’t sell himself

2.1 (sell someone on) Cause someone to become enthusiastic about:
I’m just not sold on the idea

3 archaic Trick or deceive (someone):
what we want is to go out of here quiet, and talk this show up, and sell the rest of the town

DerbyDoll · 28/10/2014 19:23

OP, you've had lots of confusing and conflicting advice here. I would advise you to book a welfare benefits advice consultation with CAB who will assist you in informing the DWP of your inheritance, and can assist you to ensure you spend the money wisely and within DWP remit.

PPs are correct that any means tested benefits are unaffected by savings of up to £6,000. This is the lower capital limit. The upper limit is £16,000. At £16,000 all entitlement to all means tested benefits will cease. Between £6000 and £16000 for every £250 you have in savings, the DWP will deduct £1 from your means tested benefits.

Hope this helps (this is an area I work in, although not for DWP)

Good luck!

NameChange30 · 28/10/2014 20:58

Definitely talk to the Citizens' Advice Bureau and/or the Money Advice Service. They will be able to give you the best advice about debt, benefits and savings.

I think the sensible things to do, in order of importance, would be:

  1. Pay off your debts
  2. Open a Cash ISA and put in £6k (if that's the maximum you can save without affecting your benefits)
  3. Find a counsellor. You might be surprised I've put this so high on the list but I think it will be such a good use of the money. If you find the right counsellor, it will give you crucial emotional support, help you cope with the things you've been through, and give you confidence to find a good job. You can look up qualified counsellors at www.itsgoodtotalk.org.uk/therapists
  4. Carry on with the driving lessons, see if your instructor will give you a discount for paying for a block of lessons in advance. Aim to pass your test so you can add that to your CV :)
  5. Take a training course, but there are free or low cost courses for people with low incomes, so don't spend more than you need to
  6. Buy a smart outfit for job interviews, it will help you feel confident :)

Things I wouldn't do:
Don't buy a car unless you get a job that makes a car essential. They're expensive and not worth it unless you have a steady job and income!
Don't give the money away (to your step-siblings or to charity) I think there might be a risk as far as benefits are concerned, but even if there wasn't, you deserve that money! It's a chance to make life a bit better for you and your children :)
Good luck and let us know how you get on xxx

fluffapuss · 28/10/2014 21:50

Hello

I am sorry to hear about your loss.
I hope that you will take some time to decide. So that you will make yourself & your family proud by the decisions that you make in the near future

  1. Agree pay debts

  2. ISAs are tax free savings. They remain tax free forever if you do not withdraw the money. You may need to get the bank to move them to a new ISA once the old ISA has run out eg once a year
    www.moneysavingexpert.com/savings/ISA-guide-savings-without-tax?_ga=1.251728714.2139343262.1403957121

  3. I believe you can make money gifts to other people including family see here www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/en/articles/gifts-and-transfers-exempt-from-inheritance-tax
    Do research first !

  4. Suggest take time to decide what you want to do with the money. This maybe your one chance to change your life for the better. What will make the biggest difference to you in 5, 10, 15+ years time ?

  5. Do some research about starting & completing a college course or online course or start some voluntary work that will provide you with some positive benefits or qualifications to add to your CV

  6. Buy a bicycle or a moped second hand (cars are expensive to maintain & petrol is expensive) However being able to drive a car is good, especially if you have a job with a free car in the future

  7. Buy some premium bonds each person can have up to £40,000 worth per year. If you win a prize it is tax free. If you dont win you still have your money in bonds which you can cash in at any time

  8. I see that you have moved house alot. Is there one place that you would like to be ? I have seen some house schemes where you buy part & rent part of the house. You could use some of your savings for this - do research first into housing associations

Best wishes & Good luck

SkylerShah · 29/10/2014 09:32

It's great to see so much concern for the benefit of others here.

To 'mipmop'

"you've been touting your "life coaching" nonsense all over the forum today."

Thank you for speaking out, the best results often come from mass input. Can I ask, what makes what I've written nonsense?

"And here's the definition of "sell" in this context"

Persuade someone of the merits of:
he sold the idea of making a film about Tchaikovsky
he just won’t sell himself

(Is this not what offering advice does?)

"2.1 (sell someone on) Cause someone to become enthusiastic about:
I’m just not sold on the idea"

There is no goal other than to provide another way of thinking.

"3 archaic Trick or deceive (someone):
what we want is to go out of here quiet, and talk this show up, and sell the rest of the town"

I'm not sure that this is applicable, but I would love to hear why you believe it might be.

At no point have I, or will I tell people what to do. Almost always people have their own answers, and those will be right for them.

Love,

Skyler

Lottegirl · 13/01/2015 17:15

speak to a lawyer about how you can protect the money. call a small high street form that deals with family matters - a lot of places will offer you advice fre of charge. call round to get someone you feel comfortable speaking with - there are ways around this so your benefits will not stop. call ASAP to get this advice - thats what lawyers are there for.

Lottegirl · 13/01/2015 17:19

also - you will not be required to spend all the money before you can receive benefits again - the threashold is 16k, and it is a sliding scale.

i agree with the above that you should pay off any debts, then put it in premium bonds, some in a cash ISA etc, which will give you more overall income.

as i said, please speak to a lawyer from a firm on the high street - they will be happy to advise or refer you to someone who can.

Viviennemary · 14/01/2015 11:51

I also thought the threshold for a lot of benefits was around £16K. Certainly pay of any debts first especially credit cards. You could buy some new good clothes for yourself and your DC's. Larger purchases such as a car could also be considered. Are you absolutely sure you don't want to buy a property because this would be the ideal time now you have this lump sum. And if you did work even part-time you would probably be better off financially with tax credits and so on.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page