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single unemployed & pregnant with baby No2 benefits question....

62 replies

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 11:37

My DD is 12 this year and I'm 4 months pregnant with baby No2. I became unemployed not long before finding out I was expecting. The father has run a mile making it very clear that although he has money he'll only be paying what ever CSA make him pay and even then he'll make it as difficult as possible. I had assumed (stupidly )that I would qualify for a Maternity Grant if I hadn't found work before the birth. Given the fact I have an operation next week and may be unable to work for a few weeks after that and the fact that the prospects of employing someone who will be taking a tone of Maternity leave at the end of the year isn't dreadfully appealing to employers I think it's unlikely I'll find a job It turns out that Maternity Grants are only paid for the first child or if all other children are over 16. Well given that DD is almost 12 and almost in secondary school I have non of her baby things and am only just getting by on what JSA and tax credits I get. Is there anything I can apply for to help with towards the costs of basic items like a cot, pram etc... or is my benefits likely to go up at all in the pregnancy? I'm terrified of how I'll afford even baby grows let alone other things without some sort of help. All advice would be welcome.

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PuggyMum · 14/07/2014 11:46

Join all your local Facebook buy and sell pages. You can get bundles of baby gros and clothes for a few pounds. We have a birth to 5 years group and there's a lot of free stuff there. You have to be quick. Or you could put a wanted post on if there's items you are looking for specifically.

We bought our cot off eBay for (mamas and papas) £32. Pram for I baby zezu) £50. Stroller for (m&p) £45.

Hopefully you'll get a few gifts too.

PuggyMum · 14/07/2014 11:47

Oh and congratulations!

StormyBrid · 14/07/2014 11:54

Your benefits won't go up during pregnancy, but once the baby's born you'll get extra child tax credits and child benefit. You can swap from JSA to Income Support at 29 weeks. If you're getting HB that may increase after birth too - a 12 year old DD won't be expected to share a room with a baby DS, but whether she would with a baby DD, I don't know.

Seconding the facebook selling pages, and check them frequently, because you do have to move fast. Charity shops tend to have very cheap baby clothes and toys. The ones round here often have second hand prams too. If you need a caraway, Asda sell them ridiculously cheap.

Congratulations!

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 11:56

Thank you PuggyMum for your advice.

I have no debt but once I pay all our basic bills I'm left with £40 a week for food , clothes, shoes, school trips... I'm not sure I can even afford all of DS's new school uniform. It would take me forever to save enough for things that even cheep or second hand, I also don't drive and I have no family or friends near by. I have always worked and have never been in a situation like this before. My advisor the JCP said i should look up Maternity Grants as I would get £500 to help but it would seem thats not likely.

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StormyBrid · 14/07/2014 11:57

Almost forgot - you should qualify for healthy start vouchers, for you when you're pregnant, and for your baby once it's born. You can use them for unadulterated fruit and veg (so frozen peas and a banana is fine, tinned fruit cocktail with added sugary syrup not fine), and also for formula or cows' milk.

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 11:58

Thanks for the info StormyBrid

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sleepyhead · 14/07/2014 12:01

Try Freecycle as well. I was getting rid of some stuff at our local recycling depot last week and saw a couple putting a whole load of brand new looking baby equipment into the landfill skip - people often have nowhere to store this sort of stuff and just want to get rid of it.

You may also have charities locally that refurbish and recycle baby equipment. Again, these may well be like new and sold for a fraction of the cost of buying new.

If you'd been able to keep your dd's stuff then your new baby would have been using a lot of secondhand equipment - there's no shame in being canny.

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 12:17

Oh trust me no shame in second hand at all just no money for it at all. I am doing ever budgeting trick to hand but after being evicted due to the house we rented being sold the only housing I could get to prevent us having to live in a 1 bed bedsit in the middle of no where that housing offered us was privet rent and I have to pay the gap the housing benefit doesn't cover.We just have no money. I'm only eating 1 to 2 meals a day at the moment so that I can try to save enough for secondary school uniform. I assume I'll be able to apply for a budgeting lone although that will just mean we are worse off while I pay it off. I fail to see why they think that until you child is 16 you keep every little baby thing just incase you find yourself pregnant again! I'm sorry I 'm sharing this on here I feel such a failure.

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BlinkingHeck · 14/07/2014 12:23

OP, can you tell me where in the country you are?
I have some things that I would be willing to pass on for nothing should you be close enough.

BlinkingHeck · 14/07/2014 12:26

PM me if you'd prefer.

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 12:27

BlinkingHeck I'm in Wiltshire

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BlinkingHeck · 14/07/2014 12:28

:-( I'm in Yorkshire so it's too far for me to drop off the stuff.

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 12:43

BlinkingHeck it was a very kind offer any how thank you

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BlinkingHeck · 14/07/2014 12:58

Get on Freecycle and see if you can pick anything up.

BlinkingHeck · 14/07/2014 12:58

And thanks wish I could help.

hedwig2001 · 14/07/2014 13:18

Some schools have a hardship fund (not sure if that is quite the right wording) for those struggling to pay for uniform. Might be worth approaching the school.

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 13:29

hedwig2001 Thanks I just looked into that I get a 50% discount on all the uniform that has to be brought from the school. Thats the PE kit and Jumpers so I still have to find £80 and then the shirts , skirts , bags, coats, shoes and three different types of PE shoes I get no help with.

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titchypumpkin · 14/07/2014 16:28

Hi book, i'm in wilts (cathedral city) if that's anywhere near you? I have some baby things you're welcome too. Pm me if you like

SoonToBeSix · 14/07/2014 16:43

Yes I agree you can't be expected to keep everything for years, some equipment like care seats would even be safe after 15 years! I think they should have made it other dc under five.
I second free cycle , if I was closer I would have some bits I hope you get everything you need op. All that needs to be new is the cot mattress maybe a local charity could help with this? I would ask at your local sure start.

SoonToBeSix · 14/07/2014 16:43

Wouldn't

BookMummy · 14/07/2014 16:44

titchypumpkin We are in Chippenham.

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SoonToBeSix · 14/07/2014 16:45

Also Bookmummy you are not a failure , it's not your fault you baby's father is a loser.

SoonToBeSix · 14/07/2014 16:51

family-action.org.uk they give grants to families

tiredgranny · 14/07/2014 16:54

contact your local council they should give u voucher for maternity clothes buy cot mattress and there are a few other thinks that are on essential list after baby born they will give you vouchers baby clothes.

county council have taken over from dwp for crisis loans

insancerre · 14/07/2014 16:57

Also contact your local children's centre as they may be able to help
Ours has contacts with lots of local firms and organisations that donate lots of different things - from nappies to new carpet s- to families