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Original poster

DIRECTIONS HEARING?can someone explain please

30 replies

7up · 19/04/2006 20:22

i have a directions hearing at court on friday, re access, the judge will have copies of both our statements. i wondered if anyone knew what this is for as i have a welfare officer visiting me at home next week and then she wants to see my ex at my home with ds to see how he interacts with him. i dont understand what the apt is for on friday as im presuming the welfare reports have to be back before he's awarded access?cant get hold of solicitor to ask her, so hoping some kind soul can take away my worries about it please

OP posts:
secur · 19/04/2006 20:26

I understand that a direxctoins hearing is where the judge tells you what is to happen nxt ie orders a welfare report etc so if he has ordered it already and it has not yet taken place then I would have expected it to be postponed, however it may be for some other aspect of the case I don't know about?

Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 20:32

secur, this is what i said to my solicitor weeks ago, that the court date should be AFTER the welfare report. seems really stupid, whats the point of a welfare report (i have to say im really cheesed off about that as im a clean cut good mum as far as im concerned)if its not being reported till after the hearing

OP posts:
jampots · 19/04/2006 20:43

they'll probably direct that hte case be relisted for after the report is obtained :)

Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 20:46

i have offered contact in my statement with my mum supervising him but my mums worried that they'l say contact can go ahead without the report?do you think this could happen?sorry all these questions, im dreading being in the same room as him. i feel so intimidated by him, i know im gona sit there shaking and start blubbing knowing meBlush

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secur · 19/04/2006 21:21

Court is realy intimidating but you ar going to have to appear at some point so maybe you could see this as a "dry run" to get you used to it?

TBH I would have expected your Solicitors (both) to have written to the Judge to ask for a postponement awaiting the welfare report.

You really need to speak to her if you can.

Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 21:29

secur,do you think if i can get hold of her tomorow its too late to postpone it for friday . i have been to court about it before last year but as it took ages i relented in the end and let him have access at my home supervised by me but it didnt last long before he showed his true colours and i showed him the door.

OP posts:
gigglinggoblin · 19/04/2006 21:39

we had loads of directions hearings, nothing ever seemed to happen, am still not really sure what the point of them was.

if you have suggested contact with your mum supervising i think they can make a court order for this if you both agree, it might be worth speaking to your solicitor and asking if you could give this a go while the cafcass reporter is around doing the report. it doesnt have to be how things finish, but is worth trying it now rather than waiting til the end of the proceedings in case it doesnt work out and you want to try something else. they wont make an order regarding access until the report is filed unless you can agree between yourselves. we did have orders made before the final hearing and i found it very helpful as we both knew where we stood

am not a solicitor btw, have just been through court several times with idiot x

secur · 19/04/2006 21:43

TBH I think it wil be too late as would have to contact other side to get instruction then contact court and await a response, but it may be worth a try if you really don't want to go and your solicitor agrees.

However, as gigglinggoblin says it could be a good opportunity to get things started for contact if all are in agreement. The fact is that teh more amenable to cotact you appear the better it shows you up to the court.

secur · 19/04/2006 21:44

oh, yes, also not a solicitor!

Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 21:51

he had refused the contact offered and is still pushing for me to take ds to a contact centre half hour drive away for 2 x 1hour visits a week. my sols and i said no especially as ds is only 18months and has health probs. my mum is worried that they are going to force me to hand ds over to HIS mother, who i dont trust and is a terrible driver AND ds doesnt know her, twice a week

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Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 21:54

sorry for keep asking questions, your answers are really appreciated, thankyou

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gigglinggoblin · 19/04/2006 22:00

that does not sound like a common sense thing to do. courts work on common sense. please try not to worry, very little is likely to happen on friday

i have been in court lots and NEVER has a judge forced me to agree to anything. they have only ever made the decision after the report is done, and then i have always been happy with the result as i was asking for stuff that made sense, as you are!

it does sound like you need to speak to your solicitor for some reassurance, but you have made a very sensible suggestion and i think he is mad to turn it down. stick with your suggestion, all he is proving is that he cant be that bothered about seeing ds as he is turning down perfectly good contact time.

secur · 19/04/2006 22:02

Well the judge could find either way or say that he needs the reports before making a decision, I would suggest saying that you are offering this contact but if he is not agreeable then you wish to await the outcome of the report.

FWIW it is usual that the supervisor is acceptable to both sides and if you are not happy then they would have to suggest someone else, however, if the judge thinks you are just being difficult then he can override that.

Your solicitor will know far more about this than me, just get clear in your head what you want the outcome to be, what things you are prepared to compromise on and what you are not and make sure that your solicitor understands those things - and your reasons for your decisions. She will do the talking anyway make sure you are going to have a good chat with her before hand and a debrief after if possible you are allowed to whisper to your solicitor in court so if you have any questions ask her quietly for clarification - she may say it can wait or ask for clarification from the judge.

Finally remember that the court and judge are not out to get you and your exp cannot do any more than give you dirty looks!

Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 22:04

thankyou gg, im so worried about it. it just seems that friday will be a waste of time and more stress that i dont need right now. il try my sols AGAIN tomorow after work and hopefully she can reassure me. one last question!do i HAVE to sit before the judge with HIM also, or can i ask to see her seperately. shes a lovely judge and was v.understanding about ds health last time i met her

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Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 22:07

thanks secur, ive got ds latest hospital reports so hopefully they will agree that contact in his home with his grandma there supervising (ex hasnt asked for unsupervised) will be in his best interests and not to be traipsed around in a car and dumped in a contact centre with loads of strangers and a strange man!

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gigglinggoblin · 19/04/2006 22:12

im afraid i dont know if you can get away with not going in front of the judge. my x was violent and i felt very intimidated but i always go dressed up and sit straight, pretending to be confident makes you look confident so you start to feel more confident! you dont have to look at him, just keep your eyes on the judge, speak through your solicitor and you will be fine. if you are concerned about going in or out, ask your solicitor if you can walk with her or see if she can get you out of the building before him - i have not been told this officially but i think in the past my solicitor has persuaded xps solicitor to keep him back so i could escape! good luck for friday

secur · 19/04/2006 22:16

TBH I don't know that you can see the judge seperatly, logistically it would be a nightmare for them!

I agree about the health POV it would make more sense for your child to stay at home and Dad to come to him.

I know it is stressful but it is a process you are committed to so you have to just take a deep breath and keep going!

Good nluck anyway - I would liek to hear how you get on, if you feel like sharing. Smile

Original poster
7up · 19/04/2006 22:19

thankyouvery much gg and secur, il post on friday and let you know how it goes.x

OP posts:
secur · 19/04/2006 22:27

Will be thinking of you xx

gigglinggoblin · 19/04/2006 22:34

me too, try not to stress too much 7up, it will all work out xx

secur · 20/04/2006 18:33

Good luck for tomorrow 7up, hope you had chance to chat to your solicitor today.

Sending all that positive stuff your way smile]

Original poster
7up · 20/04/2006 18:37

thanks secur, gave up trying to get hold of solicitor!spoke to her secretary, my sols not representing me tomorow now, ive got a barrister who ive never met before and got to meet her half hour before court time, not too happy as she doesnt know my history although im sure shes read my statement etc.

apparently tomorow is also about whos to pay the costs for the court date at end of january that my sols didnt inform me about and hence i didnt turn up. sols accepted it was her mistake, but my ex has really used it against me. saying im a court refuser. the secretary said "dont worry, im sure your legal aid will cover the costs"????bit wrong in my opinion, i think the sols should pay. never mind, roll on 10.30 tomorow and itl all be over till next time. thanks

OP posts:
secur · 20/04/2006 18:41

Shock do you have it in writing that it is her fault? that is appaling - and if legal aid will cover it why the court appearance. She dosn't sound to good dropping you at last minute either! I would be very Angry Still you might find the person with you tomorrow is an real whizz and just what you need - it can be that way!

Anyway good luck, just wanted you to know there was soemone out here giving you some positive energy!

Original poster
7up · 20/04/2006 18:44

thanks again secur, yea ive got a letter apologising from her that it was her fault. ive got that ready to take with me. at the time i also wrote to the judge apologising and saying it wasnt my fault, the sols is aware of this so praps thats why shes not going tomorow. i think its a bit wrong to use the legal aid for their cock up tho. il post tomorow aftnoon when i get back from mums and let you know. really nice to know someones thinking of meSmile

OP posts:
Freckle · 20/04/2006 18:45

A directions hearing is really just an opportunity for all sides to appear before the judge to decide what needs to be done/provided so that everything is ready for the final hearing.

I don't know what your ex means by a "court refuser". The phrase doesn't exist. If you aren't told about a court date, you can't attend. Simple as that. Your barrister will make it clear to the court that it was an error on the part of your legal advisors and not any action on your part. I suspect that the judge will order the solicitors to pay the costs as the public purse shouldn't have to pay for their negligence. At any rate, it's not down to you.

Good luck. Hope it's not too much of an ordeal for you.

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