What are the disadvantages of being very wealthy?

[Whirliwig72]

Unless I win the lottery I'm never going to be more than comfortably off but I do like to dream! So please tell me, from your own experiences or those of people close to you are there any real downsides to being seriously minted or does money make everything easier and more fabulous?

I have some very wealthy friends, who are kind and generous. Quite often they will host parties, invite a group out for a meal, etc. i feel quite fortunate to be the beneficiary of their generosity, and they know I do not/will not ever take advantage.

On some levels though, it is very difficult to reciprocate their kindness and generosity. I live well, but quite simply. In order for me to reciprocate, it involves them 'coming down' to my level - i.e., have what they might consider an inferior bottle of wine (for example).

It is a real dilemma to find a birthday gift for them, for example. Last year, I found the wife a beautiful and quite special orchid. She received it graciously, but i could see (when I dropped it by their house) that she had several more extravagant ones sitting in various rooms. So, my 'special' gift was not special at all.

They are snobby - they just have expensive tastes (which they can afford) - but it makes it very hard for anyone else to give anything to them, or do anything for them.

Having to constantly reasses where your "friends list" begin and ends

How to help out a real friend without being showey.
How to carefully teach your kids to tread the same line, don't be an arse at school about money.
How to carefully explain to DS that he can't take a small gold bar to school for show and tell (honestly was a strange conversation)

For me money comes with social responsibility, working out how to help quietly in a small community is honestly quite challenging.

they are not snobby -

oh and the ease with which you can kill threads with your reply

I really couldn't cope winning euro millions. It would totally change your life and I'm not sure it would be a good thing in the long term. Having said that if you have your own company and build it up, employ people, give people a chance yet still make a profit that is very satisfying, so it really depends on how the money is made. It would be good to be able to help charities or my choice but it is still such a responsibility.

Oh no, I could cope with the Euromillions alright: I won't tell anyone, will continue living in my house, but will send DS to private school and pretend that his very rich dad (who doesn't pay maintenance as he should) is paying for it.

I have been successful in my job and have become wealthy relative to my relatives, although it has been a gradual thing. The main issue I have had is the one ruby identifies, ie struggling with the dividing line between being a tight git and a flash git. I never know whether it is the right or wrong thing to offer to help people out financially. It has caused some awkwardness.
I do also wonder about the impact on my children, although it is too soon to say. I did not come from a wealthy background and think this gave me some hunger to succeed. I can't quite decide whether I am opening up options for my DCs because they will have a financial cushion so will be able to afford to take risks, or whether the fact that they have become accustomed to a certain standard of living will narrow their options, or whether they will not feel the same hunger making it harder to push themselves to succeed. Ultimately I want them to be happy more than successful so as long as it does not make it harder for them to be happy, all will be fine.
The final thing is that I sometimes end up having to socialise with some very posh, superior gits that I would probably not come across if I were not wealthy.
I appreciate however that we are very lucky and these are not bad problems to have!

I agree WOW, DH and I do remind ourselves that the niggles and a bit of akwardness are still outweighed by the ability to help a local group or friend or family member