any hope for the future?

[sayitwithsam]

I had my follow up appointment today and was told I had Placental abruption. The consultant said there was nothing they could have done and if it happens in my next pregnancy there will be nothing they can do then either. How am I supposed to be able to cope with another pregnancy if they can't offer me any real hope?

He kept asking me if I'd had a severe blow to my stomach or been in a car accident. I think I would have mentioned that! I had to hold back from saying "oh yeah forgot to mention I work in the circus and have cannon balls fired at my belly all day long, is that a problem?!" When I insisted that as an illustrator the most taxing thing I do tends to be changing the ink cartridge on my printer he looked down at the paperwork and said "well there's nothing more you could have done to prevent it then".
Has anyone out there had placental abruption and gone on to have a successful pregnancy? I need to hear something positive!

hi there, i don't know anything about this but just wanted to send sympathy. you don't mention how far along you were though perhaps it's in another thread. so sorry.all of us on this board who have suffered miscarriages feel sort of similar, in that we face every pregnancy not knowing if it will work. somehow the hope triumphs over experience - even if the pregnancies fails, fails, and fails again. if you really want a baby all you can do is do all the research possible, have every test and investigation under the sun; and if none of that gives any information or cause for hope, just keep trying, in case of a miracle. they happen.

sayitwithsam,
so sorry for you loss x

i have no experience of placental abruption myself but a friend of mine lost a little girl to this at 24 weeks 3 years ago, she went on to have a sucessful pregnancy a year later using heparin injections and now has a beautiful healthy daughter.

if i were you id ask to be referd to a specialist who knows more about abruptions.

take care hun x

Thanks LunaticFringe. I saw your thread after I wrote this last night and tried to email you personally about it but it keeps saying your settings won't allow that. I don't really understand this site completely yet. But what I got from reading your posts and the responses is that we are all given pretty shocking care when this happens and left feeling like we're cast adrift. When I left the hospital I felt so alone. I have my husband and a fantastic best friend who picks me up when I think I can't take anymore but medically there's no help at all.

I am taking your advice and going in to my surgery on Monday morning and demanding to see my GP. She's known me since I was a teenager and she was really cut up about me losing my baby. I know she's the one to get things done. But I'll still be on her back all the same!

The consultant said he wants me tested for lupus. I did some research on that last night because he didn't tell me a thing and I'm worried that if they think I might have that then shouldn't I have been told to hold off on trying again right now?

Yesterday was such a farce. The appointment we had booked for Thursday was cancelled with little apology and then when we went on Friday no one at reception knew where our consultant was so they sat us in the unit for pregnant women having their scans (perfect choice there you idiots). The one kind face I did see yesterday was the hospital chaplain. It's been two months since we lost our boy but he still remembered my husband and I and more importantly our little boy.

Thanks again for your replies. Having people out there to listen and tell they're own stories is a massive comfort.

A friend of mine who has had 5 early miscarriages has been put on aspirin. I wanted to ask him about that but he had been so abrupt (rude) with all of my other questions I thought I'd wait and ask my GP.

I want to feel like I'm doing something rather than waiting for it to happen again.

Not the same thing but just wanted to say my life long friend also had early miscarriages (4 with 2 missed) and was referred to St Mary's, was prescribed aspirin and heparin injections and she had a beautiful baby boy around 11 weeks ago. I hope you get some answers and I that you get referred to someone with a little bit more humanity and empathy

I'm in Kent. I just got in contact with Kent sands so hopefully I will be able to get to some of the meetings.
I'm pretty scared now. I wish they'd told me to hold off on trying. I did ask my GP and my midwife before hand and they said there was no reason I shouldn't start straight away. In fact they encouraged it as they said it was the best way for me to heal emotionally.
Forgot about Monday being a bank holiday so will have to wait until Tuesday to book a doctors appointment and talk to her about a referal.
I wish you all the luck in the world for your appointment.

getting a GP appointment didn't go well. They said the very next one was TWO WEEKS AWAY! I know that doesn't sound long but I am so very very desperate to be pregnant again. Have stopped trying now until I get the test done but I'm due on very soon (first month since a couple of years before I got pregnant with Archie that I've not had more than one in period in a month woohooo).
I am dreading my period. I have been in a nightmare mood for days now and am eating EVERYTHING in the house. Including rice cooked in gravy granules?! I don't know, I'm just very very hungry this month.
How did you guys get through the waiting process before you got pregnant again? Is there any way of being sedated until it can happen?

I'm sure my husband wouldn't complain about that. He could play his football game until his eyes went square.

Yes my husband is also suffering. When we first got together (seems hundreds of years ago now) I NEVER thought I'd be trying to bribe my husband into bed!
My GP is a very busy lady and going on holiday for a few days so it's hard to get to see her. The thing is though that she is the only person I trust now so it has to be her. And when I saw the other female doctor a few days before I lost my baby she said my mucus plug coming out was thrush...so I don't even contemplate seeing her.
I'm lucky my aunt is a midwife and she's coming to visit next weekend. She's already said she'll go though everything with me. And she said she doesn't recommend me having the stitch as it would make no difference.
I will join you in the OMW club. Well to tell you the truth I've been there for a while! This is the longest I've gone without a period for a long time. It looks like I'm magically back to my old 28 day cycle which would make tracking my ovulation so much easier. Clearly I am still crossing my fingers that this period doesn't come at all and I have a happy, easy going pregnancy (well we can all dream can't we).

I've just looked through the calendar and realised it's been 31 days since my period...now I know I shouldn't get my hopes up but that's just impossible. I've NEVER gone this long without a period. I bled more then this when I was pregnant...but we all know how that turned out.
I'm very sore around the edge of my boobs where the glands are, I have had a milky white discharge for two days (sorry for being so graphic), I'm finding it really hard to get up in the mornings, have been pooping for England and it's really really sore and I am so hungry every night even straight after I've had my dinner. Apart from the sore boobs I didn't have anything like this last time. So don't know if it's just my menstrual cycle going a bit nuts.

I've done one of those pregnancy dip tests but it was negative. It's probably a bit early yet anyway. Every time I go to the loo I'm petrified there will be blood. But nothing so far. Just a continual food frenzy. Last time I was so worried with the bleeds and everything I lost weight. If I am pregnant again I'll be the size of a house!
Good luck. Hope we both get the outcome we want.

Still no period, still no positive result. Might have to go and get a more expensive test rather than these dip things. Will give it until Monday I think. Fingers crossed.
I will still be able to have the blood tests if I am won't I? When I was trying the first time a very rude nurse told me I couldn't donate blood until I'd had a baby or found out I couldn't have them! But when I was pregnant they took TONS pf blood from me all the time, despite the fact I'd lost so much in those five months already. And my iron levels were good.

6 weeks! I did buy a bumper lot of 35 pee tests because I thought it would be cheaper if took me over a year again. And I know I should test and then wait two or three days before re-testing...but do you think I have the will power to wait and do that?

I did a farmers market today and met some lovely people. A mum buying my bears for her children on one side and a mum to two with another due in a few weeks on the other...who had many many very pregnant friends come to visit and chat about how exciting it was to be due so near each other. I've done quite a good job of avoiding pregnant women since I lost Archie (but I have a sneaking feeling they are stalking me). It was good though. I was thrown in at the deep end and survived without crying. I did feel very envious though. Listening to them chat it all seemed so simple. No tales of horror, or constant visits to the hospital. Why can't it be like that for all of us?

Anyway, the wait continues.

I bet you are. I really hope they have some positive news for you. I wonder if any of them really understand how much it means to the people they see. If so many people in the world have lost a baby then at least one consultant must have been though it too!

I hope Tuesday comes around very quickly and doesn't drag on. Isn't it amazing how time changes when you dread something to when you look forward to it? The night I lost Archie went on forever. I thought the morning would never come. But my wedding day flew past in a flash.

I got a different test yesterday and it was negative AGAIN.
My husband was very randy after almost a week of no sex (I thought I was coming on any day so didn't really feel like it) anyway this morning I had watery blood which is now more of a mucus with blood in it. There's no clotting and it's not heavy. Not by my standards anyway, I am normally very very heavy. But I'm sure it's too much to be breakthrough bleeding or implantation but it seems a real coincidence that it happened after intercourse. Am I clutching at straws here do you think?

PS the hubby and I have been trying since losing our first baby in March and I haven't bled any of those times. I did have a bleed after intercourse when I was pregnant though.