I am waiting to miscarry - for the second time in a row

[luckywinner]

I am pregnant again straight after a mc on 1st May. Had an early scan two weeks ago which put me at 5-6 weeks as was unsure of my dates. Saw a strong heartbeat and left feeling happy and reassured.

I had another one today and it wasn't so good. The baby had grown in line with dates but it had a really weak heartbeat. Even I could see the difference. The scan lady said usually in situations like this a miscarriage happens.

I am so sad. I can't believe I am having another miscarriage. And even if it is still there next week then surely a weak heartbeat is not good news with regards to the health of the baby.

I don't know really know why I am posting this. I know there is nothing to say. I am just sad. Sad, sad, sad.

[fran28]

yeah...going up first thing in the morning and should know that afternoon...i would really love to get my hopes up...but i cant...even though they said today it looked promising...having a bad day today..bumped in to 2 women i went to school with and both have a well and truly noticible bump!

[luckywinner]

Hey Fran, how did it go today?

[fran28]

hey...hospital just rang...levels are up to 1059 but they made me feel like there is no hope....im so confused right now!

[luckywinner]

Did they scan you? Do they still think its an ectopic? God you must be all over the place.

[fran28]

they didnt scan me...wanted me to come up tomorrow again but i cant..so i have to wait until thursday...one minute there saying if the levels go up by sunday just gone its not ectopic...on the phone today then they said it still could be..i cant take much more...i just need to know so i can deal with whatever the answer is! my back is killing me and now im thinking maybe it is a miscarriage..im snapping at everyone..i just cant help it! ye have no idea how much this site is helping me..thank you..to all of ye!

[fran28]

feeling very down tonight...i know its not gonna be good news tomorrow when i go for the scan...feel like crying but there isnt really any point...not gonna stop whats gonna happen!

[luckywinner]

Oh Fran, it is no wonder you are feeling down. This has been going on for ever. It is so hard to keep hope when it is such a drawn out process. What time is your scan? It is true, it is already decided what is going to happen, but it doesn't stop you from being on this rollercoaster of emotions.

[fran28]

i lost it...i cant believe it...it was ectopic..im so numb....i feel like a fool!

[luckywinner]

Oh Fran, I am so sorry. I really wanted it to be ok for you.

[fran28]

thanks...means alot...sorry..i feel like a right whimp...everyone here is going through the same thing..i just cant believe it....the doctors had giving me so much hope all week...and now its just gone..i was giving the methotrexate injection today...what should i expect to happen?

[luckywinner]

I am not sure as I was knocked out for all my erpcs. Did they give you any other info? Have you got anyone looking after you?

[fran28]

they just said it wont be like my other 2 miscarriages...thank god for that...i was in agony...im just so scared its gonna be like them...my dad and sister's have been great..i still have to go back up to the hospital next week...it wont be over until i can stop going to the hospital..im sorry ..your going through enough!