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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

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Original poster

Missed miscarriage at 9 weeks - what to expect? (opting to wait and mc naturally)

82 replies

TheBlonde · 22/08/2008 11:18

Had some bleeding so got scanned at EPU today only to find it's a missed miscarriage

I've opted to wait and mc naturally but wondering now how awful it will be and how long it will take
I'm booked in for a follow up scan in 2 weeks to check it's all gone

Can anyone tell me what to expect?

OP posts:
Original poster
TheBlonde · 25/08/2008 10:54

Starting to get fed up of waiting now (I'm not very patient)

Hospital leaflet says 85% of women will mc fine without need for D&C but RCOG says only 50%

OP posts:
Mummyfor3 · 25/08/2008 11:12

All the statistics in the world will not tell you what is going to happy to you personally, I am afraid.
IMO you can only take it day by day (hour by hour?) and decide how you feel about things. There is obviously nothing wrong with changing your mind after whatever length of time and opting to go for D+C after all. I have several friends who miscarried at home without much physical discomfort, and personally, I found D+Cs had no ill effects on me.
Hope you are not feeling too rotten and you have lots of support. It is such a sad/confusing/useless thing to go through. It helped my to remind myself that usually there is something wrong with the pregnancy and this is natures way not letting it go on longer than necessary.

catweazle · 25/08/2008 11:38

Sorry to hear you are going through this TheBlonde. I had 2 mmc before I had DD2. They were very much as has been described. I opted for ERPC for both, and got pg almost straight away after each.

I wasn't prepared for how much bleeding was involved. Both times i ended up having to go to A&E because there was so much blood. Pads do nothing- even really thick ones. I frightened DS2 with the second one because the DCs didn't know I was pg and there was this sudden rush of blood which coated the settee, carpet etc.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 25/08/2008 13:00

Sorry to hear what has happened to you, For me, the thought of mc naturally was horrifying mainly as a friend had had a horrible experience and hemmorhaged badly. I was keen to just get it over with - from finding out to being in surgery was about 6 hours. GA isn't pleasant to come round from but it has no lasting effects usually so it's nothing to be scared of. I couldn't have gone through it awake - so I was very glad of it. I was an emotional wreck.
As for conceiving - I conceived 2 months later and lost it straight away. I think my uterus hadn't fully recovered from it, but I'm sure that's not everyone's experience.
The recovery from D&C varies - I had a bit left and ended up with an infection which was horrible - but mine was a 13 week foetus and I mc at 18 weeks so I think it was harder to get out.
Do what feels best for you - I wouldn't hesitate to have D&C again in that position because I'm terrified of heavy bleeding, contractions etc but if you feel that's what you need then you should.

prettybird · 25/08/2008 13:19

I've had two mmc. First one I found out about at 12 weeks (showed 8). Had a foolow-up scan 5 days later (Friday) and the D&C on the Monday.

2nd one I found about at 7 weeks (showed 5 - had actually been a twin pregnancy). Had three+ weeks of the hospital faffing around with repeat scans (mis-reading the sonogrpahers report and kept on telling me to come back to confirm, even though the sonogrpaher queried why I was coming back )

On the last "come back" I had a mini tantrum. I had the D&C two days later.

No sign of any bleeding at any time. The only reason fro the eraly scan the second time around was becasue I asked for one after the 1st mmc.

Original poster
TheBlonde · 26/08/2008 10:13

Thanks for all your messages

OP posts:
Gemzooks · 26/08/2008 13:27

theblonde, I had similar, found out at 12 weeks it had died around 9. I am very scared of d and c and think it may pose risks so let it happen naturally, it took a week to start. It was very painful, like a mini birth, and grim, big clots etc, but in a strange way at least your body's doing it naturally, if you know what I mean, and your body knows what to do. It is very upsetting and horrid at the time, and you must give yourself plenty of rest and be very kind to yourself generally. Hope it goes ok for you..

limey · 26/08/2008 14:47

TheBlonde, sorry to hear about your loss. Same thing happened to me at 12 week scan. Wasn't offered D&C just told to go home and wait. Wasn't told what would happen and I thought it might just be like a heavy period but it was far more like real labour. Be prepared for the pain and the blood loss others have mentioned - I wasn't and that made it scarier. On the plus side, once it was over I felt strangely calm and had a real feeling of closure - like someone said on a previous post - it felt like something I had to go through to help me deal with the loss emotionally. Make sure you've got a bottle of wine in the fridge / painkillers to hand and have at least week off work. Take it easy.

Original poster
TheBlonde · 26/08/2008 21:12

Thanks both, I tried to contact the EPU today to ask some qu's but didn't get a call back

OP posts:
ladylush · 26/08/2008 21:18

Hi theblonde. So sorry to hear of your mmc Have had 2. Waited out first one and it took 3 weeks to pass. 2nd one I opted for a erpc because I couldn't stand waiting. Preferred getting it over with, but understand why you want to do it naturally.Some women wait and still have to have a d&c though. Hope you get the support you need to make the decision best for you.
By the way, not sure if I have the right person but do you have thyroid difficulties?

daisy5 · 26/08/2008 21:19

Hello

I found out at 11 weeks that my little one didn't make it much past 9 weeks. The doctor and I discussed it and agreed to wait 7 days and then book in a date and see how I felt. I had started to get pains by that stage so I suspected it was going to happen that week. It all came out in a day, on the day of what would have been my 12 week scan. I was really pleased I was at home. I got a bit faint at one stage and perhaps should have gone to hospital but held out because I really didn't want to.

I can however see how a D&C may be great in some circumstances.

Original poster
TheBlonde · 26/08/2008 21:35

ladylush - thanks for your post. I am leaning towards having a D&C now and yes, you are right, I am hypothyroid

daisy5 - I am a bit worried about getting faint etc as I am a SAHM with 2 toddlers to look after

OP posts:
ladylush · 26/08/2008 21:42

Was your thyroid well managed during your pregnancy? I read that the demands on the thyroid are much greater in early pregnancy as the developing baby has no thyroid of it's own until 11 weeks gestation.

ladylush · 26/08/2008 21:46

Another thing, I went for reflexology a couple of days after the erpc and got a huge loss the same night. It was my first session and I really do believe that it helped get everything out iyswim (sorry sounds so horrible but you know what I mean). I thought the erpc would be the end of it, but was told to expect bleeding for another 3 weeks. As I say, it all stopped a few days later but I think the reflexology helped. Or could've been psychological. Take good care of yourself. It's hard dealing with this esp. when you have two little ones. You feel you can't be upset in front of them.

Gemzooks · 26/08/2008 22:04

just to add, it could have been psychological too but I really concentrated on telling myself 'it's all over and your period is coming' , and started imagining cramps, and it did seem to set it off...

Original poster
TheBlonde · 26/08/2008 22:50

ladylush - I don't think I've had it checked since April but can't remember tbh, will ask the GP to check it tomorrow
Thanks for the reflexology tip

Gemzooks - I've been trying to convince my body to bleed tragic as it sounds

OP posts:
sue10 · 27/08/2008 08:42

Hi the blonde,
sorry to hear of you mmc, i had 1 last year and decided to wait for it to happen naturally but after two days i could'nt cope but knew i didnt really want a d+c so took the medical mangement route by taking the tablet, that night it happened, i dont feel i was quite prepared for it but hopefully i wont ever go through it again but if i did i would choose the same route. I have had friends who have had d+c's who say that was right for them so i guess it is an individual choice. Limey has given you good advice and information. Takecare, sending you a heartfelt hug.
sueXXX.

Original poster
TheBlonde · 27/08/2008 20:53

thanks sue10 - my hosp doesn't offer the tablet option but it all seems to be happening now anyway

OP posts:
wook · 27/08/2008 20:59

I hope you are OK, thinking of you

ladylush · 27/08/2008 21:02

I am convinced that my undiagnosed underactive thyroid was the cause of 2 of my m/c. If you get time, have a look at the CKS website and search treatment for underactive thyroid. There is a section for women ttc or pregnant. The dr is supposed to immediately increase the dose of thyroxine and monitor tsh frequently as soon as woman gets positive hpt

ladylush · 27/08/2008 21:03

Oh sorry, didn't see your post. Hope it's not too awful

Original poster
TheBlonde · 27/08/2008 21:06

Thanks wook, I'm waiting for DH to show up with dinner then I will attempt to watch bigbrother or rock of love

OP posts:
ladylush · 27/08/2008 21:08

It must be hard for your dh too. Hope you can support eachother through it.

Gemzooks · 27/08/2008 22:21

thinking of you, theblonde, hope you get the chance to really rest and look after yourself afterwards.

Mummyfor3 · 28/08/2008 10:41

TheBlonde, I hope today finds you well, or as well as can be expected. I am thinking of you.