Oh Fandango- I'm so sorry. I know it might seem easy to say this, but it will get better. I found out that i'd lost my baby on the 11th Jan (as you know from other thread). And the first few days were so hard. But slowly it got better, and each day I felt a bit better. I'm still not over it yet to be honest. And it's only been the last few days or so that I have felt that I can get back into some sort of routine.
But I still think about it several times a day. And I still feel sad and angry sometimes.
I named our baby and managed to keep a scan photo, which I look at sometimes. Perhaps you can find something to help you deal with the pain.
In the meantime, if you need to cry, just cry. I shut myself in my room for at least a week, only coming down to eat (very rarely). The quiet actually helped me to grieve.
I'm not suggesting you do that coz it might not be right for you. But just know that I know how you feel. It's a horribly upsetting time. And nobody knows how bad it feels and how it tears you apart until they've been through it themselves.
I took great comfort and strength in talking to people on here loads. There are so many lovely people on mn who have, unfortunatly, gone through the same thing. But are willing to lend an ear and send a virtual hug.
Sorry if i've been rambling, remember you have lots of people to suppport you on here.
Sending you big hugs.
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