Oh god. Is the same thing happening again?

[weathervane123]

Hi everyone,

I had a mmc at 6+5 (probably happened at 5 weeks, so very early) the first week of April. I was tracking ovulation and got my first v faint positive at 14dpo, which felt late. I had cramps from 11-14 dpo that were indistinguishable from period pain, except I didn't bleed, they came and went at night, and they lasted four days, which I've never had. I think I implanted late and I've heard that increases the risk of mc. I had symptoms but lost them all quickly and the pregnancy never felt right.

We didn't wait for my period to arrive post mmc, and tried again as soon as I ovulated. I'm 13dpo today and yesterday I got almost impossible squinters on three tests with fmu. Woke up in the middle of the night with cramps that lasted about five hours. Had increased cm (sorry tmi) and once again was sure AF was here early. (Not sure when I'm due thanks to mc, but cycles have been 26-28 days in the past).

I'm so worried I'm headed down the exact same path as last time, and that I can expect a chemical or early miscarriage again. I don't have any symptoms other than the cm and cramps. Obviously hcg is still really low in my system.

Has anyone else experienced two mc's in a row and noticed similarities? Any other late implanters out there with positive stories?

Hi

I had a chemical early April, had strong positives on CB tests and then 3 days later I bled. I also didn’t wait for next period, I tested my ovulation and I had high fertility so...
I’m no what I think 1 day missed period (unsure as days mixed up due to miscarriage and I’m going on the basis I’m now 2 days behind in this cycle) I took a test early last week (too early but I wanted to guage timinings) and it was not pregnant, tested again on Saturday and now shows 1-2 weeks pregnancy. I’ve had very light lower back pain similar to last times cp, but nothing as severe. I’m not going to bother testing again until 2 weeks time. I just don’t see the point in getting my hopes up, I’m just waiting for period but hope so badly this one works out. Best of luck to you xx

@weathervane123

@Che3087 good luck to you too. I wish you all the best and hope you've got a lovely sticky one!

I know what you mean about not getting your hopes up. My current situation is basically a carbon copy of my mmc in April.

I think I'm most worried that I actually miscarry very early (the egg doesn't implant properly or even at all) and my body just doesn't recognise what should rightly be a chemical. So I have this early internal bleed, then this horrid wait to actually release it all naturally for weeks, when it should be a handful of days.

I got a 1-2 weeks on 15dpo. If I make it through the week, I'll test again on Sunday (21dpo) or Monday (22dpo) and hope to see 2-3 weeks at least. I'll be 5 weeks dead on if I haven't bled by Monday. I know when I ovulated but my cycles are variable.

Right now I have virtually no symptoms except the dreaded cramps, cm, and feeling a bit bloated, and I at least had sore boobs last time. So, I think maybe I've already miscarried with those cramps and just not bled. I think my hcg levels are probably really low.

I tested yesterday and freaked myself out with fmu that gave me fainter lines than the day before. Then I tested again with smu, and though I thought the pee was way more diluted, it came up with a comparable line to the afternoon before. That's when I did the CB digi to confirm.

I just wish I could do one positive test with a clear line and not even know to worry.

Am in similar position to you op but barely there positives coming and going between 12dpo-14dpo. Period due today. Cramping last few days. Sometimes a faint positive in pm, sometimes fmu. Never consistent.

I have had about 5 CPs now. I think i have an issue at or after implantation (or poor quality eggs/sperm). After researching, I think I could have something like the low progesterone, possibly a low thyroid and/or some kind of immune response (natural killer cells) attacking the implanted blastocyst as I cannot get past 1-2 days of bfp. I did once but that ended in a mc at 5.5 weeks.

For what it’s worth I am seeing a private consultant and he agreed with my doctor google guesswork - so we are testing for the above issues. Just in case it helps you dig a little deeper. Good luck!

My faint bfps are treading a fine line between definitely faintly visible (my DP sees them) and barely there unless you squint.

@weathervane123

So sorry to hear of your journey. Try just focus on anything you can but the painstakingly days waiting, I know it’s hard and I’m trying to practice what I preach here. . It’s so hard this early on, you just don’t know what to expect and it’s hard not to get your hopes up. I took another clear blue yesterday and it said pregnant 1-2. But I’ve had very slight lower back pain which I had last time, so makes me worry I’m due to bleed and miscarry. I need to leave it alone and test in a week or so to get past the “5 week” mark. Even then it doesn’t mean I won’t still miscarry later. After my chemical in April (4+2 days) i started to bleed 2 days after period due so o want to get to to next week on this time round to “get past” the last dates. So silly but every little step closer is better I guess. I’m very much trying to stay calm and let nature take it’s course.

I did read lots online and here about aspirin in early stages. I’ve not told my epu yet as I don’t see point based on last time, so will ask their advice once I contact in the next week or so

Good luckkk x

@sparrowfeeder I'm so sorry to hear of your losses. It's such a terrible rollercoaster to be on. I've been thinking I have one or more of the issues you mention, plus whatever causes my body to not recognise that it's over in good time.

I'm 38 too, so I'm guessing my egg quality may be less than ideal because of that. We're able to conceive fine - I caught the first cycle we tried and I'm pregnant again on cycle 2, but it just feels hopeless. I wonder about the natural killer cells too as I'm rhesus negative and know I have to have the anti-d jab, but I've been told it's not necessary before the placenta has formed.

I hope you have a sticky baby this time. Will keep my fingers crossed for you.

@Che3087 thanks and you're right. I'm trying for small milestones too. So far I have Monday in my mind. If I can get to Monday without bleeding, I'll be five weeks. Or... not, if I've had a missed miscarriage. I find it incredibly cruel that I can't even be comforted by the absence of bleeding!

On the aspirin, yes. I've bought some and think I'll just take it. The recurrent miscarriage clinic did tell me they would prescribe it if a thrombophilia screen came back positive for a clotting disorder, but since I'm pregnant now I can't have the bloods done (has to be six weeks after a pregnancy). She also said to ask GP for progesterone but honestly I can't get through to them to get an appointment. It's maddening.

One step at a time, for all of us. xxx

Oh and rather annoyingly, I think the recurrent miscarriage clinic went ahead and booked my midwife appt for me. I got a text about it this morning, and was like... I didn't book that. It just feels like tempting fate to have done that so early. All I wanted (and I don't know if I've gotten it) is to book an early scan. Some woman took my NHS number on the phone and told me she'd let my consultant's secretary know. I'll probably email her direct (again) tomorrow.

@Sparrowfeeder sorry to hear how difficult you journey has been.

@weathervane123One thing I would say is wow, at 33 I just wasn’t even remotely aware of what my body can and can’t do. We just were not taught the detail around conception at school. More so .. wear a condom or you will be a young mum. Would like I’m at the very same stage as you, next week will be week 5 for me too. I’m probably going to hold off them until getting in touch with the midwife and EPU. As last time as soon as I found out. I registered at the hospital, booked a call with community midwife and an early scan for 8 weeks and then had to cancel all of them 3 days later. I’m the same as you, if I can get to 8 week earlY scan I’ll start to feel a little better but I think until at least 12-15 I’ll be constant limbo and keeping my feelings down x

Oh and I have also started taking aspirin today 75g

@Che3087 It's crazy isn't it?! I was the same. Spent most of my late teens and twenties desperately trying not to get pregnant without having the first clue about all the things that need to go 'right' in order for it to actually happen! It's criminal they don't teach us in schools.

How are you doing today? I hope you're holding up well.

I'm a little blah. Went to the docs about the cramps and she's prescribed the progesterone and referred me to the epu. Hopefully they'll scan me to rule out ectopic either tomorrow or Thursday. I'm thinking they won't be able to give answers as I'm only 4+5 (on Fri) but if they agree to scan me and my lining looks right, then at least I'll know I haven't miscarried already and it isn't a total waste of time taking the progesterone pessaries. My consultant also said it was fine to take 150 mg of aspirin, even though I haven't been tested. So I guess it can't do any harm.

Look at the pic for my bullshit line at 16dpo! Oddly I'm not even distraught. Just fed up and resigned to whatever will be, I think.

@weathervane123 it’s so frustrating! I’m sorry you’re still so uncertain but glad you’re getting referred to EPU and taking progesterone. Regardless of the outcome I feel the unknown is the worst and the WAITING! I’m very impatient anyway so this is just torture

Me today, as far as I know still pregnant don’t reLly feel any symptoms apart from a little backed up. I’m still trying to hold off until late next week when I should be almost 6 weeks (fingers crossed)
I’m very much the same as you, resigned to “bad luck” but I’m reminding myself this is the journey not the current destination! It will happen, for both of us!

X

Thanks both. @weathervane123 my period cane today so that’s resolved it. This has happened pretty much monthly since January so I am used to the dashed hope now. Getting tests including thrombophilia, nk and mthfr done tomorrow.

Your test is good, not as lame as mine! Not all women have same levels of hcg, providing it is doubling. See table.

(Name changed!)

Good luck both, hope yours stick

Is it possible to have hcg levels which result in positive test but not actually be pregnant and it’s just hormones ? Is that a stupid question...

Sorry to hear @CPsRus but glad you’re getting the necessary test to give you a better idea. ❤️

@CPsRus I'm so sorry to hear that. You sound like you're bearing up well. So glad you're getting the tests now and I do hope the answer is found in those. I'll have my fingers crossed for you that there's a straightforward solution available.

Thank you for the table too. Aren't those ranges insane?! I have no idea if my hcg is doubling but as of today my lines seem darker than they were, though I'm desperate to see a dye stealer as I'm 17dpo today (4+3, I think). I got to 2-3 weeks on a CB digital though last time and that didn't mean shit. I guess I just have to deal with the uncertainty of this whole process.

@Che3087 Not a stupid question! Technically the answer is yes, because you can have a positive pregnancy test following a confirmed miscarriage. It took a while for mine to go negative in April, and they ask you to make sure it does within 3 weeks because you may be 'retaining product' - (their phrase, not mine), in which case you'd need medical intervention.

There are also some types of tumour that can cause false positives but as I understand it these are very, very rare.

The GP messed up my referral to the EPU for cramps, so now I have to wait a bit longer for that to get sorted. Knowing my luck I'll have to wait until Monday, and next week I'm slammed at work so can't sneak off for an appointment without causing a fuss :-(

Thanks for clarifying! @weathervane123The medical terms I find so brutal but perhaps easier to digest as not personal.
I’ve not actually tested to see if my hcg levels are increasing... I’ve only taken a CB twice over the last week and as you know holding off until end of next week if I can.
Would you say hcg level testing is better - I guess it is as much more clarity on what’s going on inside. Where do you purchase? X

That said, tracking hcg is only really possible by having repeat bloods done every 48-72 hrs so you know the actual number. At home urine tests are so variable and dependent on what time of day/how hydrated you are/how your kidneys have metabolised the hcg. There's so many reasons a test could have a darker line one day and a fainter one the next.

The only way I think you can be confident something is probably wrong is if you go from having a positive to everything being negative and you also lose all symptoms around the same time. Or, if those damn weeks indicators start going backwards. That happened to me last time and it was horrifying.

I really only trust First Response Early Result. They're very sensitive and can detect 6.3 miu/L. I've found they can be helpful if you do want to look at lines. Here's mine from Monday (14dpo, darker in person) and yesterday (16dpo). I'm in the UK (London) and get them from Amazon. £6 something for a 2-pack.

I also do trust the weeks indicators, though I think there's quite a bit of leeway with the ranges they detect, so it wouldn't make me panic if it didn't align completely with what I thought right away. I'd just keep going until I got 3+.

Whoops, it didn't post the first part of my message! They're too long lol

@Che3087 Yes, I find the term easier in a way. Once my image of a baby has been shattered by the loss, I don't want to think of it in that way. I'm sure many women are different.

I think you're smart not to test frequently tbh, and I admire your strength in holding out. I think I might've done the same had I not worried from the very beginning with the pregnancy I miscarried because of how faint the lines were from the start.

Everyone tells us to hold off testing until period is due, but when you do and that line is faint, it's nerve-wracking! It's definitely why I've been keeping an eye on it this time. I'm not good with surprises at all, either, and if my body is up to something dodgy, I want to know asap.

I’m going to order first response so i can get a different perspective than CB. Keep us posted on how things go, I hope you get EPU booked in as soon as possible to hopefully alleviate all the uncertainty for you.

I feel so bloated and I forgot to say the last 7 days I’ve had the WORST ulcers and sore mouth. I’ve never had it before unless run down so wondering maybe it’s a good sign that things are happening. It’s such a journey, we look for any “signs” and any changes. It’s not a joyful experience, the shit you see on Instagram is a load of bollocks.

I’m in London too, in Surrey. 33 with my partner and dog (originally from Scotland) and this is our first time trying. 2nd month, first CP x

@Che3087 Poor you! Ulcers are so annoying! Have you got some Bonjela in? I was super bloated last time, but not so much this time. It probably is a positive sign because that's definitely a preggo symptom! And yeah, I'm not on Insta, thank god, but agree it's a load of shit!! Pregnancy in my experience is just a matter of physical misery and lurching from one mental health crisis to the next!

EPU rang and let me know they're declining to scan me, despite booking me in for Monday. I had bloods done today and they came back at 74 for hcg. I knew my levels were low because of the faint tests but I was hoping to be in triple figures. I'm going to be scanned when I return from a trip to see family up north in early June.

I did some very suspect maths and came up with the hypothesis that I implanted at 10dpo (5th May), which gave me a shadow on 11dpo and a faint positive on a frer on 12dpo, exactly a week ago. So, I've technically only been pregnant 10 days. Based on that calculation, my hcg has doubled from 0 every 48-72 hours to give me a 74 today. It's barely doubled, though, and likely slowly, and I think a rise of 60% is preferred. So, no comfort there.

My progesterone level is 85 and the nurse seemed very happy about that, but as I've been taking the stuff for the past two days I'd expect it to be up there.

I'm back to exactly where I was a day ago: waiting!