Brown spotting after D&C, how long for?

[KnitKitty]

I had a D&C for MMC last week on Tuesday. Bled for 3 or 4 days and then have had brown spotting since then.

Every time I think it's stopping, it starts again. I didn't have any on Sunday (or hardly any), didn't put a pad in the next day and then made a mess of my underwear. I'll go for almost a whole day with nothing and then a bit more will appear.

How long did yours last for?

I was told not to have sex until bleeding has stopped as there is a risk of infection - I'm assuming that includes this brown spotting, even though it's intermittent?

I found out I was pregnant on February 18th, and was roughly 4-5 weeks along. Started bleeding on and off a few days later, but that stopped after about 2 weeks and then I found out about the MMC on the 7th March and it's been a long, drawn out journey which I am just sick to the back teeth of now. I want my body and life back to normal.

RedRobin7 I can't stop dreaming about giving birth and miscarrying and stuff either. It's horrible.
It's great that your friend has suggested take-away and drinks. I think people are a bit too scared to do the wrong thing around me, so I haven't really socialised recently. It would be nice to let off some steam.

Hi Pips841, welcome to the club. Very sorry for your loss.

CobaltRose Pips841 I think the bleeding is different for everyone. I bled loads when I first came round from surgery but it calmed down to period-type bleeding after the first hour. I had light period bleeding for about 3 days (not much at night at all) and then brown spotting for about another 9 days after that. I think some women get bleeding on and off right up until their next AF, so I hope neither of you have that.

I think the pain is pretty common too. I had mild cramps for a day or two, but again it's different for everyone. Just keep an eye out for any other symptoms or if the pains get worse or different.

And I think it's completely normal to still feel tired a few days later. I was still sleeping 12 hour nights and napping in the daytime 3 or 4 days later. I think it was because my blood pressure was a bit low from the blood loss in my case. They kept me in a while longer than they said they were expecting to the day of my surgery because my BP was something like 60/40 for a couple of hours. When it crept up to 90/60 they let me go home but it's usually more like 120/80 so I felt very sluggish. The anaesthetic can take quite a while to fully leave your system too.

Jessabean that's interesting about the scan stuff. I don't know if it helps or not really, to have some sort of idea why the pregnancy didn't work. I really like the engraving you chose for the keepsake box. (I wouldn't mind the link of where your bought it, although I have been wondering about decorating my own box). And it's so lovely that the cherry blossom tree is in bloom. No, you don't sound like a weirdo at all!!

RedRobin7 was 10+2 when the baby stopped growing? Maybe they got confused with that? I would personally just give the hospital a call and ask for a correction on the EDD; they might even have an explanation as to why is it wrong?

I've not been too bad today. Work is keeping me distracted but I feel like all I think about when I'm not there is losing my baby and I'm getting really tired of it. I need a distraction outside work now, I think.

Also, I've been completely dry up until now, but the last couple of days I've had some CM again, so I'm hoping this might be a good sign that the pregnancy hormones may be going at last and ovulation might be on its way. Due to test again on Tuesday but feeling impatient.

Hope you've all been ok today. It's been beautiful and sunny all day here and I've been stuck inside! Sod's law! Hoping for some good weather tomorrow so I can get out for a long walk.

Thanks everyone. Bleeding is still fairly heavy but pain isn't too bad.

Feeling very down today after several days of feeling pretty okay emotionally. Thankfully work have been brilliant and are letting me take as much time off as I need, but for some reason I still felt guilty not going in today (I work weekends).

I'm also supposed to go back to uni on Monday following Easter break, but I'm not sure if I'm ready yet. Again, I feel guilty for even considering not going in even though it'll have only been less than a week after my miscarriage and surgery. Technically I wouldn't miss anything as all lectures are uploaded online, but still...

Just feeling overwhelmingly sad and guilty today.

Hi everyone
Glad i found this thread. I had surgery yesterday,baby died just over 12 weeks.
Had some heavy bleeding straight after the surgery, but now only brownish light discharge. No cramps or pain, feel surprisingly ok and want to get back to normal. Went for a walk but realised how tired my whole body was so now back on the sofa.
Is it normal for bleeding to slow down so soon? Is it likely to start again?
Felt ok mentally earlier too, but now a bit down and teary. Going to take time off work next week but also concerned it could make me worse twiddling my thumbs at home...
It’a just shit isn’t it xx

Ithinkthatsenough I'm glad you've found us too, but I'm so sorry you're going through this as well. Everyone is different with the bleeding, you might bleed a lot or not much at all, and it can stop and start and go on for a long time. Take it easy and put your feet up whenever you feel you need to.

I understand your worry of making things worse if you stay at home twiddling your thumbs. There's no right or wrong thing to do. If you want to go back to work, do, but just be warned that you may find it harder than you expected. You will definitely need them to be aware of your situation and have their full support if/when you decide to go back in case you need a moment to yourself every now and again.

CobaltRose I felt super guilty about taking time off from work too, especially as they've been really short staffed with me there so I was just imagining them struggling. And because I recovered quite quickly physically that added to the guilt, but it is important you take some time to come to terms with what you've been through and allow yourself to feel up to it again. When I went back to work I felt ok(ish), but a week in I had a day where I just had to keep hiding away in a cupboard because I kept bursting in to tears. The emotions side of it comes and goes and sometimes completely out of the blue.

Talking of which, I said in my previous post that I was having a good day. I've now been sat in tears again. Gosh this is such a roller coaster!

What set me off was talking to my partner about keepsakes, and we're not really on the same page. He didn't want to upset me and was very careful of his wording, but basically was worried that if I got a bracelet or something it might be too much of a constant reminder of the miscarriage and it was so early on it wasn't like losing a grown child. (Those weren't his exact words btw, but it was along the lines of that) He did say he knew that we weren't dealing with this in the same way or coming to it from the same state of mind - I've wanted to start TTC for about 2 years now and am really ready for a child, whereas he only tentatively came on board about 6 months ago and isn't as in to it as I am, and I went through the physical side of being pregnant and losing the pregnancy. But I felt a bit like he's brushing it aside and not acknowledging that it was a little baby we'd made, even though it didn't make it very far.
I explained that I'd like a keepsake to help me move on. I've been thinking it might help to stop thinking about it every minute of the day; like when you write thoughts down that keep going round your head when you can't sleep to allow your brain to stop obsessing over the same things over and over. He did understand and gave me a big cuddle and said if I feel I need one he's on board, but maybe wait a while first?
Also, to me, we've lost our first child. All that potential is gone, the life I've been dreaming about having with a family got torn away from me, and I don't want to just act like it didn't happen and pretend the next one is the "real" child. Urgh. I just feel crap now.

Having said that, I found a really lovely, comforting quote online, so thought I'd share it with you guys:
"Babies lost in the womb were never touched by fear, they were never cold, never hungry, never alone, and most importantly they knew love."

@KnitKitty thank you for sharing, that's a really beautiful quote. I read one online that resonated with me the other day which was "courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying 'I will try again tomorrow'. Helped make me feel a bit stronger about looking forward.
Sorry your OH isn't on the same page as you grieving wise. Ot can be difficult- as you say they've not physically carried around this being, made every conscious effort/action with them in mind and so already really emotionally bonded with them in the same way as we have. It was the same with my OH especially the first time around. Similarly I was more ready mentally for parenthood than he was- I knew in an ideal world for him he'd rather of waited another couple of years at least. He did kind of except my grief but admitted to me it didn't seem real to him so though he was sad when I miscarried it wasn't as a tragic event for him as I was finding it. I think it's hit him a bit harder this time though as he was more invested in the idea of parenthood this time, particularly last week or so before my exam we really thought we'd made it and were making plans, name ideas etc..
Sure he hasn't meant to upset you though. It sounds as though he was saying it with you in mind- not wanting you to be upset more than necessary. But of course you need to be able to grieve and to do it in whatever way you feel will help & keepsakes can help you move on Vs be a reminder I think- though obviously it's all individual.

@RedRobin7 sorry to hear about that letter. That is really awful. I think you should feed that back to the EPU as that is really poor procedure & whoever has made that mistake in their line of work should really be made aware so they can try not to do the same in the future. It is just so unnecessarily hurtful & insensitive to those in our situation& as you say a bit confusing to your GP reading it too.

@Ithinkthatsenough welcome to our group but so sorry for the circumstances that you find yourself here for

@KnitKitty this was the link for the keepsake box also by the way:
www.notonthehighstreet.com/netalternative/product/personalised-wedding-memory-box

Know it says wedding memory box but you can put whatever message on it you like and is nothing particularly weddingy about it! XxxX

Morning ladies, so again I find myself awake so early but this time it's because my husband just came to check I'm still alive after I got so drunk last night I was sick several times on the way home. He's never seen me like that and then I ended up falling asleep on the sofa in my coat. What a mess I am! I did have a good night with my friend though and it was very much needed.

I'm glad you all agree with me that the letter from the EPU should be corrected. I will phone them tomorrow to ask why it says all that and hope they say it's an error they'll fix.

@KnitKitty I've also had some CM too and hope that means things are getting ready for my first period. I'm dreading the day it comes. My husband is also on the same page as yours and it's quite upsetting he didn't see the baby as a baby yet. I had been waiting two years for mine to get on board too so I understand exactly how you feel about it all. I've got my first counselling session tomorrow so I hope to address it all then rather than arguing with my husband about it!

@Ithinkthatsenough I am so sorry you find yourself joining us here but I hope we are able to bring you some comfort. It's massively helped me having these lovely ladies to talk to. My bleeding went brown within a couple of days and was mostly light but I was getting random heavy bleeds and clots which was fairly normal. The more I moved about the worse it got so try not to overdo it.

I also found a quote that I like:

"If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever".

I know it's a sad one but it's a true statement and it's comforting in a way.

I also found a quote that I like:

"If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever".

I know it's a sad one but it's a true statement and it's comforting in a way.

Thanks ladies xx
Spent the morning in bed but its made me worse, so just going to try and get back into a routine with the kids etc from tomorrow onwards whilst being off work. Im usually very active so being so still isnt good for my mind or body! I’m familiar with grief unfortunately....so know how to process,help myself and that it will get better, but can’t stand this limbo, i want to get back to normal in every way but know, its too soon and im too emotional.

Are any of you going to try again? I have kids already, but dont know if i can stand it again especially the worry until the scan... and even then things might go wrong afterwards as i found out

@Ithinkthatsenough So sorry you're struggling. It will be a tough week for you but you will get there. It's nearly been 4 weeks since we found out at the 12 week scan and 3 weeks tomorrow since the op. I've lost friends and family but this grief was different and I feel guilty in a way because it almost seems strange to be more sad about this loss. I was distraught and found the two weeks I had off work were mentally draining. When I went back to work I found it much easier to pretend to be okay and be distracted. I've not cried for a few days and managed to spend hours last night talking it all through with a friend and I'm already feeling stronger than I thought I would. My husband is going to be away all this week so I'm worried I'm going to struggle but I've joined the gym so I'll keep busy and hope that helps.

We have agreed to start trying again in June after we've had a nice holiday. I am very anxious about it though as I'm terrified it will happen again or that I won't even manage to get pregnant again. This whole thing just sucks.

Afternoon everyone. I'm feeling a lot better emotionally today. Feel like I've turned a corner, almost. Writing all of this down has been a massive help, I've found.

Bleeding has slowed down quite a bit. It's like the tail end of a period now. I'm hoping this is almost the end, but I'm not holding my breath just yet.

My fiancé and I have agreed we'd want to start trying again very soon, pretty much as soon as my bleeding has stopped. Well, not actively trying but not actively preventing pregnancy either. I am of course worried about having another miscarriage, but every nurse and doctor we've seen has told us there's no reason why we wouldn't have a successful pregnancy in future. I didn't quite realise just how much I wanted a child until I was pregnant (the pregnancy I lost was unplanned) and now that's been snatched away there's nothing I want more than to be pregnant again.

Advice seems to be conflicting regarding TTC after miscarriage, though. Some sources say you can start right away (as soon as bleeding has stopped), others say to wait at least one period, others say to wait at least two or three, others say to wait at least six months! So confusing! Hence why my fiancé and I have taken the not-trying-but-not-preventing attitude for now.

Jessabean thanks for the link.
It's good to hear your OH reacted similar to mine. It's not that he doesn't care, but like you said, it's not as real to him. He was really excited about the pregnancy and couldn't wait to tell people, so I sort of expected him to be more upset about losing it, but hey, everyone is different.

RedRobin7 good to know you let your hair down and had a nice evening.

Ithinkthatsenough being active can certainly help you to cope. While off work I was doing a lot of sewing projects and knitting/crocheting interspersed with putting films on and falling asleep on the sofa. I went for a few long walks with my OH and family as well.
People differ as to when they're ready to try again. If you need a few weeks or months, that's fine. It's also fine to decide you don't want to try again at all. You'll know if/when you're ready again.

My OH and I want to start trying again as soon as possible, but we're waiting for a negative PG test first.

CobaltRose the consultant I saw at the hospital said wait until after first AF, but the nurse said you can start as soon as you get a negative PG test. They prefer you to wait until after AF so that the new pregnancy is easier to date, but there's nothing wrong with trying before that. It is a good idea to make sure the HCG has gone from your system before trying though, to avoid confusion as to whether a pregnancy test is the new or old pregnancy.

But like you, we will be not-trying-but-not-preventing too once I get a negative.
(I think the advise is different depending how you lose the pregnancy too, a friend of mine had an eptopic and was advised to wait 3 months so that might be why there's conflicting advice out there?)

Just thought I'd mention that I tested again this morning and it is finally negative, so that's 3 weeks on from the surgery. Crazy how pleased I am to see a negative test. I also can't believe the surgery was 3 weeks ago. I have no idea what I've been doing for the last 3 weeks. Time has escaped me.

I was thinking of you this morning RedRobin. Glad to hear it's negative. I'll be testing too tomorrow morning. Will be 3 weeks for me as well.

Hoping you all have a good day today.

Morning everyone. Bleeding has slowed down to light spotting now, which I'm exceedingly happy about. Hopefully this means it's almost the end, but again I'm not holding my breath. If this is anything like my period it'll be back with a vengeance in a day or so. I hope not, though. Nurse did say I may bleed for up to three weeks, but it's only been five days and it looks like it's on it's way out. Hopefully.

Also, slightly TMI but I'm finally getting some relief from the horrendous constipation I've been suffering for well over a week. Phew!

Pain has pretty much gone. Only really hurts now if I cough or laugh. So, all in all it looks like I'm getting towards the light at the end of this very dark and difficult tunnel

Morning everyone

@RedRobin7 glad your test is finally negative. I did another one this morning but is still faintly positive 🙁 rang EPU just as didn't look that different from the one I did 10 days ago but they reassured me as long as physically things have settled down-which they have completely now to be honest- then it can still be normal & probably just my levels were really high at the time of the miscarriage. Said if I don't get a period by about 6-7 weeks post surgery then to see GP then to get bloods done & are what's happening unless I get any physical problems in the meantime - go back sooner. Hopefully my body will have sorted itself out by then though! I guess it has been the FRER tests I've been using as well which are really sensitive.
Still frustrating though.

@CobaltRose glad your symptoms have been settling down. Hopefully that's the worst of it now then.

RedRobin7 you soulnd a lot like me... i’ve found being sat in the house torture and just going over things in my head. Ive been out on the farm helping today, nothing strenuous but im already feeling more positive and myself. Haven’t cried yet but there still time! Having a day out with DH tomorrow just us, will be nice hopefully. Work in at the back of my mind but i have a fab colleague who is covering for me, she’s the only one who knows atm... i think like you redrobin i’ll find the distraction if work helpful when the time comes.
My only “worry” is my lack of bleeding...great if it means it has stopped but im not convinced...we’ll see ,still early days. Glad some of you are feeling better in yourselves as the weeks go by xxx

Aaaand just like that, the bleeding has come back! sigh

Afternoon ladies.

So, bleeding has stopped completely. For now. Haven't had any bleeding since last night. Pain has gone, which is a bonus.

I wouldn't be surprised if bleeding started again though, I've heard that's pretty common.

ColbaltRose. I hope your bleeding doesn't start again, but like you said, it could do. Glad your pain has gone!

I did my 3 week pregnancy test and it's still positive. Rang EPU who said test again on Friday and ring back if still positive. I expect it will be because it's not even a faint line. jessabean was your positive a very clear one or was the line fainter?

Lady I spoke to said it's a good sign that I've no pain or bleeding and it can take a while for hormones to go back to normal. But I think they'll book me for a scan if it's positive on Friday. Sigh

Sorry @KnitKitty that you're still testing positive as well. 🙁 this sucks doesn't it. Is a definite positive but still a faint line Vs control of that makes sense? Looking back at my tests when I became pregnant was similar appearing to when I was testing positive with the FRER & clear blue was saying not pregnant and then 1-2 weeks so I guess that means levels are pretty low. Will attach a pic of line strength I mean (sad that I still have preg test pics from beginning of the pregnancy) as is probs easier than describing. Is good that they are erring on the side of caution. As you say fact that you've not got any pain or bleeding is good & am sure scan will be fine & will be hormones settling. My EPU weren't interested on how positive the test was or anything else after I said physically things are fine. That and they're reassured that they scan as they do the procedure to make sure they've got everything. I think from what they said it can take a while for the hcg to come down & it's really quite variable depending on how high it was. Hopefully it will hurry up & come down soon though! I hope your test Friday is negative though! 🤞

@CobaltRose sorry things are quite as straightforward as you were hoping bleeding wise. Is still quite early days and normal at this point I think. Hope the bleeding settles for you soon.

Thanks for sharing Jessabean.

I'm just looking for any sign that my hormones are getting back to normal right now! I can't really compare my tests to the first ones I did because I used a different brand. FRER are so expensive, I had to down-grade.

Are you going to test again or after what the EPU said to you are you just going to wait for AF now?

If you don't mind me asking, are any of you having sex again? And are you using contraception at the moment?

My partner and I are both keen to have sex again but I think we may have to buy some condoms. Haven't used them in about 6 years (the one pack we found the other day were out of date by over a year) and back then he had some performance issues when we used them so not sure if it's worth it or if I should still just hold out for the negative PG test.

I've never wanted AF to arrive more than I want it to right now.

So, woke up in excruciating pain last night. Very sharp pain in my groin and right thigh. I went to the loo and had quite a bit of red blood, but the pain is better this morning and the bleeding has slowed down again.

I dunno if the pain was related to my miscarriage/ERPC or constipation, as I am still quite gassy/bunged up. No idea.

@CobaltRose sorry you're still having a bad time with the bleeding. Are you passing clots/bits of tissue at all? It may be worth giving the EPU a call if so as they may want to check & scan you to make sure there isn't anything left behind. If it's just fresh blood though it may be fairly normal at this stage I think - I didn't have much bleeding but was warned that I may have fair amount of bleeding and pains on and off for a few days. As you say pain could be constipation or to do with the miscarriage it's hard to know- is so much going on in there!

@KnitKitty not really sure whether to test again now or not as EPU have essentially said they wouldn't want to see me regardless of result unless I'm septic, bleeding or in severe pain! And I don't think there is anything left behind really- I think I'd feel worse/have more symptoms if there was. Same time like you I just want to see evidence that things are moving on though so I can start to look forward a bit.

Don't mind at all although hasn't been anything I've had to deal with yet since the surgery though as my OH has been away. He's back tomorrow though. Had thought about it and think I'm going to suggest using condoms this time. I will probs ovulate soon ish if I'm going to this cycle (whenever/if that starts!) & I don't think I could handle falling pregnant straight away again at the moment- would be too much of deja vu to last pregnancy & feel I need another few weeks to get my head in the right space.
Will stop using the condoms and start trying again after my first period is the plan though need to talk things through with OH & check he's still on board with this obviously!

Is a tricky one in terms of protection. We're used to condoms as was the protection we were using for about a year prior to TTC (didn't get on with any form of contraception apart from oestrogen based ones which i can't have because of migraines) if you're not comfortable though not sure what to suggest. I would personally not have unprotected sex before the negative test as whether you fall pregnant straight away or not it could create weeks of uncertainty and anxiety as to whether this is new pregnancy or the miscarriage. I know it seems stupid to use protection when all you want is to get pregnant though. And that this wait for things to normalise before being able to start again feels unbearably long. It will pass though & we will get there eventually!