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Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.

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Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

I think I might be having a miscarriage

67 replies

verysadtimes · 29/05/2015 14:59

No sure why I'm posting really - have name changed anyway.

I am 6+5, very early days. Have had niggling pains in my lower abdomen for the last couple of days, this afternoon I found a good smear of bright red blood when I went to the toilet. None on pants (yet), only when I wiped.

I called 111 who directed me to call my GP who directed me to call the EPU at the hospital. EPU didn't answer but I left a message and am waiting for them to get back to me. Don't really know what to do. If they don't call me back should I just carry on? If I get a lot more blood do I need to be seen or will it just happen on its own? I'm very scared and sad.

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verysadtimes · 01/06/2015 14:43

I understand that no one can tell me anything for sure until the baby or babies grow or don't grow at my next scan - I just wish I could know. Hate the uncertainty...

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Adventuregame · 02/06/2015 14:42

Verysad how did DH take the news of the 2 hearbeats ?

verysadtimes · 02/06/2015 15:04

Not great actually. I'm annoyed with him because he's usually a pretty considerate guy and very equal partner. He does have a bad cold at the moment so came home from work grumpy and tired. I told him what had happened and he barely reacted and then took himself off for a nap for 2hrs, I needed his support and was upset. He apologised later but still wasn't great. He's terrified of the idea of twins I know - so am I though.

I'm feeling really really mixed up today. I don't want twins, I've never wanted twins, I don't think we can cope financially, physically, emotionally with twins. It would be terrible for DS, terrible for our relationship. But then I think of that little flickering heartbeat and I feel guilty for even thinking like that. So so hard. I don't want to start thinking of and planning for twins when we might lose one but I feel guilty for thinking like that and wondering if that's for the best. Then I have the fear that we might loose both. A week seems a very long time to wait.

Sorry, went off on a tangent there.

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Adventuregame · 02/06/2015 15:27

No problem - all totally understandable points. I spent a long time when I was pg debating if I wanted a baby, if we could afford it and if we wanted to change our lives so drastically then just as I got my head round it and started to get excited we found out about the mmc. I didn't let myself feel bad for thinking that way as I was told it's normal to panic even if you've been longing for a baby for ages !!

You'll find a way to cope if you end up with twins and if you don't it won't be because of any thoughts you may or may not be having ! Rant them all out on here and it's not like you're saying them out loud !!

Will DH be able to come to the next scan with you ? Is it on Monday next week ?

verysadtimes · 02/06/2015 16:34

Thank you. You are very right that no matter what is going on in my head it won't actually affect the outcome. That is a comforting thought. I am actually trying not to dwell on anything until next week when I have the scan. We both desperately want a baby - but two babies scares us. At least we will have 7+ months to get used to the idea!

Scan is on Tuesday morning. DH could come, and has offered to come, but would need to take the morning off work (he works an hour away so would need the whole morning realistically). His day's off are fairly precious, he's only got a couple left this year so I'm reluctant to ask him to. Will discuss with him again tonight (hopefully he is in a better mood!)

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Raffertys · 02/06/2015 19:54

Have been thinking about you today, op. Hopefully your dh will be in a better place to support you soon. And no matter what happens, everything will be alright in the end

verysadtimes · 03/06/2015 08:58

So DH was in a far better mood last night, tbf I guess he needed some time to get his head around it! He is much more positive about the idea of twins than I was expecting, still would prefer one but calm about how we will manage.

Lots of twinges but no more blood here at the moment. Am trying to decide whether I can hold out for Tuesdays scan or whether to go to the EPU on Friday. I'd like to know what's going on but don't relish the idea of another 4 hours in a warm room trying to keep my toddler quiet - especially as it might still be inconclusive. Better to wait till Tuesday but it's such a long wait!

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Adventuregame · 03/06/2015 10:12

Do you have a set appointment for next Tuesday ? I'd be tempted to go Friday as well I think. Could you turn up super early and be first in the queue ?

verysadtimes · 03/06/2015 19:54

Yes I have an appointment so should be much quicker. I think I'm going to play it by ear for Friday, see how I feel tomorrow.

I'm feeling much calmer and more in control today. I'm realising that if it's twins we will cope, if one dies and we keep one it will be sad but we will be ok, if they both die it will be devastating - but we will survive. I'm feeling peaceful.

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Adventuregame · 04/06/2015 08:24

Verysad sounds like you're being very brave !! You're right the booked appoinment will be quicker and probably less stressful. In reality going in tomorrow won't change anything and you'd still worry over the weekend even if they told you everything looked fine. So try and enjoy the hopefully sunny weekend and see what next week brings !

verysadtimes · 08/06/2015 19:32

So I don't know if anyone is still following this but tomorrow is my scan. Predictably over the last week I've done an about-turn and now desperately hope I am having twins, I want both my babies.

I've been spotting, fairly continuously dark brown for the last week, I'm no longer having pains, I have had a few clots. I guess I'll just have to wait and see, I'm trying to resign myself to the fact that at least one of my babies will have gone, possibly both. It's been an endless week.

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Lahottiereturns · 08/06/2015 19:38

OP I will be waiting to hear how it went when you get back tomorrow. The emotions you have had over the last week are so utterly natural (and you describe them so well). The very best of luck, and please do let us know....x

impatientlywaiting · 08/06/2015 19:41

Good luck very I'll have everything crossed for you.

TerryTheGreenHorse · 08/06/2015 19:44

Best of luck for tomorrow OP.

JugglingLife · 08/06/2015 19:45

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. Keep strong.

Yikes123 · 08/06/2015 19:48

Hope all is well xxx

MomentOfWonder · 08/06/2015 20:03

Best of luck, will be thinking of you x

verysadtimes · 08/06/2015 20:08

Oh, thank you all so much! It's nice to have some support, I haven't told anyone IRL because of how unknown things are and have been desperate to talk about it - this thread has been my outlet.

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306235388 · 08/06/2015 20:13

Good luck for tomorrow OP

charlie0123 · 08/06/2015 20:28

Good luck op

AMcoffeeLover · 08/06/2015 20:40

Everything is crossed for you

hullabaloo234 · 08/06/2015 20:46

wishing you the best of luck for tomorrow OP

daisydalrymple · 08/06/2015 21:10

Best of luck tomorrow op hope all goes well and please update us. Will keep everything crossed for Two strong heartbeats xx

OllyBJolly · 08/06/2015 21:25

Hope it goes well for you tomorrow.

I had a twin pregnancy, miscarrying one at 10 weeks. Remaining one was born a healthy 9lb 12 oz and is 23 next week.

verysadtimes · 09/06/2015 10:26

Just quick, will post more later but BOTH BABIES OK!!!

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