Medically managed miscarriage

[ginghambingham]

Hello there,

This is my first post - so apologies if I should have posted elsewhere.

We found out last week that our baby had stopped developing. I have to go in for another scan tomorrow to confirm that the baby has died, but they've told me not to be hopeful. I should now be in my 9th week, but it looks as though the baby died around six weeks. It was my first - very much wanted - pregnancy, and I'm in my 40s.

They wouldn't talk to me about my options last week - but I have been looking at what comes next online.

I don't have a great deal of confidence in the hospital, so really don't want surgery. I'd hoped they'd just give me the pills and it wouldn't take more than 48hrs. But I'm not sure this is what happens. I live in South Wales.

Can anyone tell me what happens once they've confirmed it? Will the Epau give me the drugs, or will I have to go to the gp? Is it just one lot of drugs? How long does it take for them to have an effect? Will I have to have them in hospital or at home? (The hospital is 40 mins from where I live.)

The waiting this week has been horrible. I'd hoped nature would take care of things - but she hasn't. Even the spotting that first took me to the Epau has stopped.

I don't know if it sounds weird, but knowing what's going to happen would make me feel less like I'm going mad. It's been a horrible week, and I just want it all to be over now. Any info would be very helpful. Thank you.

Hi ladies how are we all? Well I'm confused as ever... Had d&c in aug first period was nov 13th so would have been due still nothing but I took an ovulation test a tesco one and it was postive?? This was yesterday when supposedly I should be 3 days late... Took a clear blue ovulation test no smiley face I've never had a smiley face with these ones what's up with that.... Getting very frustrated by all this confusion and thinking if I could I'd buy a new body that wasn't all messed up ?? xx

For you all xx

hi ladies,
hope that sounds very frustrating, I don't really know what is supposed to happen with periods after d&c but I guess it is probably not that uncommon for them to because a bit irregular as your body has been through a lot in the last few months. I guess I would speak to my gp if I was worried. I hope you are not too stressed out by it.
I took the pills that was supposed to make me miscarry on friday but I don't think they worked properly. I woke up on saturday morning at 3am with the worst headache I have ever had and took some ibuprophen and lay awake until they eventually kicked in. I didn't really pass many clots or anything so I am worried I will have to have the surgery now. I am going for a scan tomorrow so will find out then.
It's so crazy, I keep waiting and hoping for the period pains to kick in, I have never wanted to be in pain so much as I just want the whole thing over! Especially with christmas approaching and I don't feel in the spirit at all.
Hope you are all ok, am thinking of you all and sending hugs xxx

Hi snowface I get the wanting it to be over... I hope when u go for scan u don't have to have the surgery as I get its just prolonging the whole thing for u. It's so hard ladies and I think we are very strong to share on this page our most intimate feelings... Just remember as hard as it is ur not alone! hopefully together we will all make it through big hugs and good luck snowface!! X

Thanks Hope, I'm really nervous about the scan but it will be good to get it done.
How are you today?

Hi - to OP and others - for what you are going through.

This happened to me 4 years ago and it was a very distressing time (it has ended more happily for us now).

Firstly I had "retained products" after mine - a ghastly term meaning not everything came away. I needed several scans to watch it finally disappear. Don't be afraid to push for this as you don't want an infection.

Secondly, I agree so so much still needs to be done to improve care. I am in scotland and had to wait to obtain the medically managed option for 7 days because they didnt have the resources otherwise. My baby had definitely died but I still felt pregnant and it was so distressing simply waiting knowing my baby was dead.

OP states the RSPCA would not treat a dog this way and I agree. :( I would be happy to lend a hand to any MN campaign.

Thinking of you all xx

Hi ladies
Still no period still as confused as ever... Snowface how did u get on today was thinking of u... Thinking of u all. Hi roonerspism I totally a agree better care is needed When I went for my d&c I was treated so matter of a fact and treated like some like a stupid wee girl I'm 30 and even if I was younger geezo have some respect for my grief! Hope today's a better day today for us all xxxx

Hi rooner, thanks for the thoughts. I keep saying it but It is so helpful to be able to talk to others who can relate.
I am being treated in France so the system is a bit different here so can't comment on the uk system. The doctors have been nice but really casual about the whole thing but maybe they do it on purpose to try to keep us calm. Personally, I have found the information on this forum to be so valuable and I wanted to read it to be prepared.
Today was ok thanks Hope. There is still 'stuff' in there but I've been given the option to take the contraceptive pill for 2 months and have a check up scan after my periods to make sure that it's gone. It's not ideal because obviously, its still dragging on and we can't ttc now for 2mths but since there is apparently no urgency for the d&c, I would have to wait until the ny for it so I might as well try with the pill. At least, I can try and move on for now and get back to work.
has anyone else tried or heard of this method?
So frustrating for you too Hope. Hugs to you all

snow I'm glad to be of any help. No one really talks about it but it is so so common. The stuff I had left they also just watched. It basically came away when my periods restarted. (I didn't take the pill). I think it took 3 months for the whole thing to resolve. (I conceived again 3 months after that).

Take care and stay strong x

Ok thanks, I might start a separate post on this topic. Back at work today, feels good to have some semblance of normality.

That's reassuring to hear that you conceived again so quickly. Thanks again x