Recurrent Miscarriage Support - tests, treatment, trying again - thread 9

[bakingtins]

Welcome everyone - pull up a chair! A thread for anyone who has suffered multiple miscarriages and is in need of information, moral support, tea or sympathy. Newbies very welcome.

Can we start the thread with a recap of where we are all up to again, please?

fingers crossed, tiny

Hi, I hope it's ok for me to join this thread. (I've never posted before)

I've had 2 miscarriages, one at 5 weeks (happened yesterday) and one at 6 weeks. I'm feeling bit low wondering if I'll ever get any further than this and not sure whether it is just bad luck or whether I should be trying to get some tests done. I'm 36 and beginning to panic that my age is against me.

I'm so sorry to read about people's losses. Congratulations to those with a bfp and fx crossed they progress well.

Sorry this has happened to you again Hongkong5. Most places will only do further testing after three consecutive miscarriages. In my case I had to shout and scream at my GP to get a referral to the recurrent miscarriage clinic after six and even then no appointment came through. When I moved house and changed surgeries they asked me! I got an appointment really quickly then. For the first two I got the 'just bad luck' but the thing is that for many women that is the case otherwise they wouldn't say it. Early miscarriages are usually due to the baby not being genetically able to survive and the body rejecting them as a result. The statistics for miscarriages and the most common are before 12 weeks is one in five pregnancies but my Aunt who is a midwife says it's more like one in three but a lot of women don't even realise they'd been pregnant at that stage. Not something any of us could do because we are all acutely aware of every tiny change in our bodies now! I really hope that for you it is a case of the next pregnancy going smoothly.

St Marys will do the shirodkar stitch tinytear. I've got a consultation in March where Prof Regan will talk me through that in more detail. I'm really hoping it is something that holds my cervix completely closed until I go in for delivery rather than the cerclage I had before which did nothing other than tear my cervix. Anyone on here had the shirodkar?

Thanks aMuminwaiting. I think I am probably just feeling emotional today and overthinking things, I'm a natural worrier and always assume the worst!

AMum so sorry to hear your story and very sorry about your uncle. Glad St Mary's are sorting you out though.

Tiny FX for you. I had a false AF alarm and (thankfully) took my aspirin just in case - a few days later I got a BFP. :) All sorts of things like pee dilution can change things (I wonder if that's why people get symptoms e.g. sickness at different times too?).

Hongkong Hi, sorry to hear you're going through another tough time. :( The 2nd loss is often the toughest as you're not eligible for tests yet but so fearful - nevertheless the vast majority of women are successful 3rd time, fx that's you. St Mary's do test privately if you feel you cannot wait.

Thanks squizita. Just feel bit sad today so really appreciate these messages and advice.

Quick question - latest worry from me! About a year before TTC I had slight bleeding on intercourse. Got it checked out by gynies at local hospital, several colcoscopy thingies and bit of lazering/freezing cells: nothing serious, they said it "cervical erosion" (which also comes up as 'ectropian' online) probably caused by hormones after coming off the pill. Interestingly I had similar bleeding after my partial molar recovery (when similarly my hormones were falling).

Should I ask about this at St Mary's? Is it dangerous to pregnancy? My understanding is it's just the skin on the outside of the cervix affected and not its integrity... is that right?

Welcome hongkong and sorry you are suffering another loss. I agree with squiz that the second loss is emotionally very tough, as it's hard to swallow the 'bad luck' line again but you are not taken seriously wrt referral for tests etc. The figure normally used for MC is 15% of confirmed pregnancies (where your period is late, so if you include chemical pregnancies it would be a higher figure) so about 2% of women will have 2 in a row purely through bad luck. It's about 1% of couples that will go on to have three in a row and of those they will only find a cause in half the cases that are investigated, which is why three is the cut-off for starting tests. You can go privately to get tests done, you need to weigh up whether you can face trying again or whether you want it investigated now. It costs about £200 to see a consultant privately. I went private after my third miscarriage, but it was not 3 consecutively so I didn't 'qualify' on the NHS, and the consultant advised tests which my GP was then happy to perform. You can normally contact a consultant to discuss a referral, if they would not do anything after 2 MC I'm sure they will tell you that. My situation was a little different as I had 3 losses at 8-10 weeks after having seen a heartbeat, which is unusual.

squiz I'm pretty sure a cervical ectropion is an annoyance and makes you more prone to spotting, but doesn't affect the function of your cervix. Ask at St M's anyway though.

Ectropion or erosion is not harmful to a pregnancy in any way. It's the cells of your cervix growing outside the wall. The protrusions are sacks of (tmi coming your way now) mucus and are really tender so can bleed really easily. They're due to hormones so can feel worse when your pregnant or having a period. My GP sent me to the hospital to have mine removed because she thought the added worry of bleeding from that in my next pregnancy would drive me nuts and possibly mask bleeding for another reason. However I do still have spotting and when last examined the doctor could still see the ectropion (so not sure what the consultant removed?!). Anyway. It's an annoyance and very scary to see blood when pregnant so an incredible worry to have on that score but unfortunately the more times you've been pregnant the more chance you are of having it.

Thanks bakingtins. people seem to recommend St Mary's and I saw that Zita West has a clinic that will see you after 2 miscarriages. At the moment I feel like I need to do something but at the same time it really could just be bad luck and I am overreacting. Having read this thread you realise all the things that can go wrong and I'm so sorry for everyone's losses.

Thanks amum and baking! I will ask but it's very reassuring to hear it's just an annoyance not a risk.

I had surgical management on Friday and the hospital confirmed they'd taken tests from the foetus / placenta (to be honest not entirely sure as wasn't really taking much in). Not sure when I'll get those results back.

Made the mistake of drinking done alcohol yesterday in an attempt to get back to some form of reality and that just ended with hysterical crying for two hours. So thankful for having an incredibly supportive and sensitive boyfriend.

Congratulations on all BFPs. I can't work out how to highlight names as I'm on my phone.

So sorry kirinm. There's tons of tests they can do, chromosome testing as well as checking the functions of organs depending on how developed your baby was. I had a whole list of test results for my last baby, including looking at her organs and she was 17 wks. They usually don't bother going into details, you just get 'normal' or a medical explanation of things that aren't right which I normally get my Aunt to decipher for me. Evie's tests all came back normal apart from signs of preeclampsia which was put down to my waters breaking early. It's such a horrible feeling isn't it? You want them to find something that can explain why it happened and something that can be put right next time. Finding nothing leaves you in limbo land. I always feel so empty. Physically, because my baby's gone from my body but also mentally. You invest so much hope that it just leaves you so raw. Glad you've got a supportive boyfriend. My hubby and I were shocked at how both friends, family and the medical profession forget that the baby is not just a woman's. He still gets ignored at the hospital like it's nothing to do with him. OR has to ask if he can come into see consultants when he has just as much right to be there as I do.

First trimester miscarriage they are normally testing chromosomes to see if there was any genetic defect. They will also be able to tell what sex the baby was so worth thinking whether you want to know or not. It takes about 6-8 weeks to get the results. They may also look at whether the placenta was normal. It will probably give you some closure to have a reason for the loss, or if the embryo was normal it's a spur to getting something done in terms of pursuing the cause of the miscarriages.

Muminwaiting - so sorry to hear about your loss. I feel devastated at 11 weeks but by 17 weeks I can't imagine how heartbreaking that just have been.

I have to say my friends and family were really good and acknowledged my BF feelings in this. We did have a great midwife.

Baking - we've decided we'd like to know the sex. I think it will help with some closure. I have to say I was quite impressed that the referral to the RMC was dealt with so quickly. I didn't expect it. I guess I'll have to wait and see if the process is as smooth as they suggested.

hongkong so sorry that you are going through this. I did find my 2nd miscarriage difficult to deal with as you are not entitled to testing under the NHS. If it's any comfort I know a few people who've had 2 and went on to be absolutely fine in the next pregnancy with no treatment. Having said that I did do some of the basic tests after my 2nd. As the others have said you would Prob need to pay for those privately. Wishing you all the very best whatever you decide to do.

amuminwaiting so sorry to hear of your losses, I just can't imagine what you've been through. I hope that St Mary's are able to give you the help & support you need. I am a patient there and do find them really good.

Katie I am sure you can go to St Mary's as an NHS patient. The waiting list last year was 3 months which does seem like a long time. You can see Raj Rai or Professor Regan at their private clinic too which of course is much quicker. Their private secretary is Mary Stanton. I can find her email address if you want. If you are doing tests now it's probably best to wait for those results first so that you have those to talk through with them. They will want you to have had a period after your miscarriage before you go anyway. I think the only benefit to going privately is to speed things up as you get all the same tests under the NHS anyway. They don't test for NK cells (either privately or under the NHS)

I wonder if any of us see each other there and never realise. I met a lovely young woman when I was waiting on the ward to be shown to a bed. There was a group of six of us all waiting in the hall to go up this narrow flight of stairs and we all looked like we were going for an exam…which we were really but you know what I mean. I know the woman I spoke to was also seeing prof Regan. She was asking about the clexane injections because I've had them in two pregnancies and she was a bit nervous about doing them. Maybe we should have a special look or nod we can give each other!

I went to St Marys between February and June/July 2011, did anyone go around then?

I went Sepember-October 2013 and then last week (Weds) in the morning! (I was the one who blubbed before my scan and then came out all relieved).

Hi Ladies wow it's been busy on here sorry I've not been around!

Welcome to all the new ladies but so sorry you all find yourselves here there are some really sad stories :(

Congratulations on all of the bfp's! :) sorry I can't name check as I'm on my phone but I'll catch up when I'm not at work.

I'm feeling really anxious again especially the last few days I'm not having my scan for another couple of weeks but im worrying something is going to be wrong. Im paranoid my uterus isn't as big as it should be I can feel the ridge low down but nothing higher up I looked at my notes and last week the midwife wrote =D so I suppose that means its ok but Im. so worked up! Im having acupuncture tonight so hope she can chill me out. Have any of you pregnant ladies had or having the flu jab? The midwife said to have it so I'm booked in for thursday but surprise surprise Im worried about the risks. Sorry I'm a paranoid wreck.

butterfly I had the flu jab in my last pregnancy.

it was hilarious, they opened the clinic at 11 so at 10h55 there was a GIANT queue outside the GP of OAPs and 2 pregnant women

Lol Tanny :) was that pregnancy successful if you don't mind me asking?

Signing off for a few days, ladies - lovely hubby is taking me off for a 'dirty weekend' and Grandma is looking after the boys.
My Dad has had the all clear after his tests, they don't know what is wrong with him but he doesn't have bowel cancer
Will catch up soon...

Oooh enjoy Baking :) great news about your dad!

Oh baking what a relief re your dad. Hope whatever it is is quick/straightforward to treat now!
Enjoy your weekend!!