Missed miscarriage: has anyone else been through this?

[Penel]

I had 8 week scan yesterday and were totally heartbroken to be told there was no heartbeat and our much wanted baby had died about a week ago. My body hasn't clocked on to this yet so I have not miscarried. I have been told I may miscarry naturally, if not will need to have an ERPC.

Bit about us. We lost our first baby a year ago at 14 weeks. Baby was very poorly and we were told would not survive. We therefore made heartwrenching decision to have a medical termination and I was induced on 23 December 2009. I then had to have an ERPC in January 2010 as I was still bleeding heavily.

I don't know what to expect next (apart from the emotional emptiness and devastation of course). Anyone else able to advise on what to expect?

How are you feeling Penel? I hope you are Ok and that the op went well for you. e gentle with yourself and take time for your heart.x

Penel, I found out just before 12 week scan that my baby had died at 8 weeks. I was in a lot of pain so opted for the ERPC. Luckily me health insurance covered me, I was in at 7.30am the next day and home by 10.30am. This was a Wednesday and the NHS had told me I would have to wait until the following Wednesday to get booked in for an ERPC as I wasnt bleeding enough to be classed as an emergency, I could however "pop in to A&E for morphine"! For me it was definitley the best option. I had two weeks off work in total, I felt ready to go back a bit before that but in hindsight am glad I didnt. Take as long as you think you need and hope tomorrow goes ok.

Thank you all so much for your kind messages. ERPC went well yesterday - luckily health insurance covered me too, which meant I had op much sooner than I would have done on NHS. We arrived at hospital at 0655, was operated on at 1030 and was home by 1600 and tucked up on sofa. I was expecting to bleed for weeks (I did last time), but amazingly seem to have stopped bleeding today. Am taking things slowly though as mustn't over do things. We are moving house on 14 Feb, so temptation to pack lots of boxes is hard to resist, but hubby is being strict with me. Will see how I feel on Monday, but will try and be sensible and not go back to work too soon. I did last time and was an emotional wreck when anyone asked me how I was (it was just after Christmas, so obvious question was "Did you have a good Christmas?" which was an impossible question to answer as we lost our child on 23 Dec). I have now had op and need to get emotionally strong again. I can't thank you enough for all your support. This last week would have been so much tougher without you all x

Hi Penel, sorry to hear about your sad news. You sound strong. take as much time now to be kind to yourself. I had a missed miscarriage a few years ago but happily went on to conceive a healthy son 5 months later.
Take care.
xxx

Glad you are feeling Ok Penel. Take it easy.

Hi Penel, so sorry to hear of your losses.

I found out 3 weeks ago yesterday that I'd had a mmc. After a tiny amount of beeding I was scanned at 10+1 weeks and baby had died at 7. Had erpc on the Tuesday.

Physically it was fine, but days are still hard. The ladies on here are just great, full of support. It's been a lifesaver tbh! There are a few of who had mmc & erpc around the same time.

Take care of yourself, and take as much time as you need. I only went back to work on Thursday, and wish I hadn't now!!

Hi, So sorry to hear your news. I am in the same situation right now. I went to the hospital last fri and was told I had a missed mc and was told to wait 2 wks and come back for a scan on the 11th Feb and then if nothing had come away then I would be admitted to have an erpc. However today I have started to miscarry and have been told to go straight to A&E if the bleeding gets too heavy or the pain is unbearable. This is now my 7th mc. The hardest bit is the waiting around to see if you will miscarry naturally especially knowing you are still carrying your very much wanted precious baby and still feeling very pregnant. My pregnancy symptoms started to ease this morning and I had bad pains last night and having been in this situation 6 times previously I know what is to come. If you need to ask any questions then please feel free to ask me and I will do my best to answer them for you.
Again I am so sorry to hear about your loss.
With deepest sympathy. carron.xxx

Hi Harassedinherpant and Caz1323. I am so so sorry. I can't believe how brave you are being. Op went well last week but think I was so focussed on ERPC it was only afterwards that it really hit me. I had a low day last Friday and hubby took me out for lunch to cheer me up and we started talking about plans for the year - holidays etc. Normally I love talking about holidays (what girl doesn't!), but I just lost it as we had lovely plans for the year, including welcoming our new baby into our lives in September. I just wasn't ready to accept that those plans had changed and we had to make new ones. We are moving house next Monday which I am actually really looking forward to as it will be a fresh start. We have had so many happy times here, but I want to say goodbye to the sad times and hopefully we will have much luck in our new home. You are all amazing and I am so grateful for your support. You give me strength. Good luck to you all xxx

Penel, there is an old saying which I've seen happen many, many times...New house ~ new baby don't give up and good luck with your move.