Menopause and feeling utterly lost - any tips and advice to feel like me again?

[BreathingDeep]

I'm 48, menopausal and to say I've lost my mojo is a huge understatement. I feel utterly lost, exhausted, overwhelmed and I'm living with a constant knot of dread in my stomach - a feeling of impending doom and it's really hard to carry on with life as normal. I feel like I'm made of the most fragile glass and could shatter at any moment.

I've recently started HRT and on my practitioner's advice, have upped the oestrogen element in the hope it will make things feel better, but right now, I'm feeling so out of sorts and I'm really struggling.

I have a really busy life and stress is high. I run a busy business (which was battered during Covid and we are still in survival mode, trying to repair the damage and get back on firm ground) and as a result my work can often be intensive and pressured. I have children who need my attention and need me to be on form, not forgetting things left, right and centre or so tired I can't keep my eyes open. I feel like I'm saying 'yes, of course, but give me a minute' ALL the time to them, before promptly forgetting whatever it was that they wanted me to do.

My friends, lovely as they are, are all dealing with their own lives and I'm trying to keep all of this inside and as a result, I feel like I've hit a wall and just can't cope. My husband is very, very supportive, but only understands so much. Plus I have zero libido.

I've put on weight too and I know I need to tackle it, but I feel too exhausted and time-poor to attempt exercise and the lure of comfort food is too high. Making an active decision to take care of myself feels a step too far right now. As a result, I feel worse about myself - I'm bigger, I have limited clothes that fit and look good, my hair doesn't look great, my make up doesn't seem to work the way it did and everything feels just... off.

I know I'm far from alone and I would be so grateful if any of you could share your words of wisdom. If you've been here, what helped you get your mojo back? I know I need to give the HRT time, but is there anything else I can be doing to help myself?

@Dawn1331 I honestly have no idea if these supplements work but when I stopped menopace plus for the regular one I had 3 nights of repeated waking and feeling red hot. Moved back onto the Menopace with 2 tablets and that has stopped again. I don't know how much worse my anxiety would be without though.

I've had plantar fasciitis too in one foot. I use a roller and try not to walk round barefoot and find that has really helped. Had no idea it was menopause related, it really is the gift that keeps giving!

@BreathingDeep I felt compelled to reply to your thread as I can relate to your post and it's so hard isn't it when you know you aren't able to be your old self. I don't run a business but we both work full time and have young ish DC - I just can't keep on top of life if I am not at my best!
Hopefully the HRT will help as others have said it takes time and you must tweak it if things don't improve.
What has helped me is self-care which I used to be rubbish at - I am very careful with my diet now (I had to lose a Lot of weight in 2020) I don't drink in the week at all, prioritise sleep - it feels quite dull at times but is necessary.
I have got an app to keep on top of the family diary / to dos / meal plans - DH is actually using it too and it has eased the mental load a bit - definitely reduced my worry about forgetting things !
The thing that is most pleasurable is I have taken up daily (ish) yoga and that seems to give me some Me time / calm every day . It's only 20 Minutes a day to squeeze in and I am absolutely addicted to the Benefits. I am going to look at some Of the vitamins on here Too. Good luck

@PantyMcPantFace i didn’t connect PF to peri - just assumed I had pushed myself too much running when I could feel pain! Oestrogen is interesting. I was prescribed one pump which alleviates physical issues, but I feel mentally better on two - however two gives me physical PMS type symptoms like bloated tummy and sore boobs. I’ve stuck at one but might play around with it a bit.

I found the boob symptoms eased off. Definitely a "wham" when I increased oestrogen initially - but then got better and then disappeared.

The other thing to remember is sore boobs can be a sign of high OR low oestrogen. As can so many fucking peri symptoms....so you can find yourself whirling round in circles trying to work out which way to go.

I have had PF (crippling) twice. Once when undiagnosed underactive thyroid. Went (without any other interventions) when started treatment. Almost immediately. As did a major hip pain linked to inter-tibial band issue (yep...a tendon) - again...disappeared completely once levothyroxine started.

Second time - when peri and not on HRT.

Oestrogen (the right kinds as there are various types) is key to tendons and shite...which is why we are told to be careful lifting etc during pregnancy. So makes sense that not enough = tendony issues.

It maybe worth "working through" the boob issues for a few weeks to see if it goes - as one pump is very low dose. (Caveat...not a Dr)

The anxiety is horrible. Plus random zapping pains in the old ovarie. Brain fog is horrendous at the moment x