Peri menopause confirmed at 40. I'm absolutely lost.

[CassieJumped]

For the past 18 months I've had lots of weird health issues the main one being a period which lasts a day. At 39 I had my bloods done. Can't remember much about it but something was slightly off but I was fobbed off with a 'come back in 6 months'
The way I was dismissed made me reluctant to go back.
For the past 6 months I've been surviving on minimal sleep. I have sweats and flushes and lots of other niggly symptoms and I started to feel like I was going crazy.
The other week when I said that to Dh he said 'we're getting older babe, that's just part of it' I told him he was dismissing me just like the doctor had and I emailed to get my bloods done.
Spoke to the female doctor at the surgery who sorted the blood form out and she was great.
Then had a really low week and wondered if it was possibly depression as well or instead of.

I've just had a call from the doctor and had the diagnosis of peri menopause confirmed.
She said something about levels and mine was 30. I should have written it down. I broke down on the phone and she was great and really sensitive. I felt validated that I wasn't going mad but now for some reason I feel heartbroken. I've got three lovely children (2 teenage daughters who I want to help see menopause the way taught them to see puberty and periods when I get my head round it) Dh had the snip a few years ago so there were no plans for more. I'm still sad. I've had a huge snotty sob on my own in my room as Dh is away and not back until tonight. And I'm still crying whilst typing this out but that kind of eye leak crying.

The doctor has said because of my age she's going to arrange a scan to see why my ovaries are failing (ouch 😢) and do my blood pressure etc.

She's sending a prescription to the chemist for ten sleeping tablets and hrt patches for I think three months.

If anyone has any good informative links I would really appreciate it.
I wanted to know what was wrong but I feel stupid that now I know I'm incredibly upset.

Thank you for reading. I know it was ridiculously long but I know how well informed you will be.

@Hungry675tf

Hi OP, I'm the daughter of a long line of women who went through premature menopause, so myself, sisters and cousins were brought up expecting to get it. It was talked about openly and in quite positive terms which made a difference.

The upshot of it was we were brought up well educated about what might happen, and with the knowledge that if we wanted kiss we should crack on sooner rather than later. We've all now got our careers established and had kids in our late 20's early 30's. No one would leave waiting until 35+ to start trying.

It has been a positive thing for us.

Thank you. I hope to be the same. My mum was 50 when she went through it but had barley any symptoms just had a last period and all over and done with. She's actually been a bit negative about me being on hrt which has hurt a bit.

I don't understand why you need a scan? It's not exactly a rarity to become peri-menopausal at 40. It doesn't mean anything untoward it's going on, it's just a depressing fact of life. That said, it must be somewhat a shock if you weren't prepared for that to be a thing yet.

@CornishGem1975

I don't understand why you need a scan? It's not exactly a rarity to become peri-menopausal at 40. It doesn't mean anything untoward it's going on, it's just a depressing fact of life. That said, it must be somewhat a shock if you weren't prepared for that to be a thing yet.

I also don't understand why your GP has sent you for a scan. what does she hope that will prove or disprove? They can't see anything other than ripening follicles if there are any.

You aren't menopausal just in peri.
If your periods stop before 45 that's called early menopause.
If they stop before 40, it's premature menopause.

You are lucky to have had your children young as they are teens now. Many women are still trying to conceive at 35-40.

Try not to get downhearted. With HRT and your family complete, it's not a big deal as it can all be helped with topping up your hormones.

@CassieJumped

Do. To be forewarned will help you be prepared so you know what could happen. Not everyone experiences it but many do and there are many different ways in which one's vagina can be affected.

I am 35 and my gp has mentioned it 3 times now. I have a family history of early menopause and I think it's started with me. I am going to phone gp up and ask them as my periods are very odd between 35 and 70 days. And I am getting less every year now.

HRT is amazing - totally sorted my sleep out. Hopefully it will address most or all of your symptoms and you'll be wondering what you were worried about.

It's just been agreed that a year's worth of hrt can be included on one prescription so unless you have other regular scripts, I wouldn't get the pass for hrt.

@sansucre

Oh, I should have said, my specialist believes stress can play a huge part in early menopause. I know I was thrust into during an incredibly stressful time in my life.

Sorry to me-rail, but that's really interesting. I went into early menopause at about 41, but I think I was possibly peri for 3 or 4 years beforehand, which coincided with an incredibly stressful period of my life. Everything I've seen online says that stress doesn't affect menopause, but I have often wondered as, as far as I know, no other female in the family had it. My grandmother had her last child at 46.

@CassieJumped your in shock right now but give it a couple of days and some research and you will feel much better about it. Download the Balance App it's a great tool for logging your symptoms and chatting with others who give really great advice.
I first went to the GP at 38 and was basically laughed out the room, here I am at 42 and started my HRT on Tuesday. For me it wasn't a shock just pure relief that I was being listened to and given lots of different treatment options.
The hard thing for me is that I know no one irl going through it and those I know who have gone through it it's been sudden due to medical intervention so again different.
We all need to talk about menopause, my DM has never talked to me about it but I've told both my sisters that chances are they may start early too as one hasn't got children but I know she wants them so she's now got the knowledge that there maybe a time limit.

Thank you everyone. I'm obviously still learning what it all means.
I've brought the girls to their dance class but I'll be home soon and a good hug from Dh will help. I feel drained.

Cheer Up OP. You aren't alone. I am just turning 46 yrs on this coming Sunday. Just started HRT after 7 or 8 yrs of Peri symptoms and I feel much better. I know ladies who are roughly my age or slightly younger who left having children til their early 40s. I, 100% sure, wouldn't like to be going through Peri and dealing with yelping toddlers. I have a 21yr daughter and I want to inform her that she may go through an earlier than menopause. I have no idea about my own mother as she can't remember !!

Dealing with Peri symptoms in your late 30s or early 40s, it does make you feel shitty mentally, especially if its NOT happening with friends of a similar age but they'll go through it all eventually too.

The peri menopause can really interfere with your sleep. HRT can really help with that and your other symptoms. Also this is a good website, and they also offer private consultations if you ever felt your doctor wasn’t listening to you. www.newsonhealth.co.uk/
Don’t get fobbed off by your doctor though, if you are, just ask to see someone else.
Do loads of research, arm yourself with knowledge. Also make sure your husband is on board and can support you if you need it.

Thank you. I didn't take a sleeping tablet last night as we sat and had a couple of glasses of wine and talked about it and how I was feeling.
I actually settled better last night. I didn't sleep through but I wasn't awake as often and less anxious so I think just being heard has helped.
I'm picking up the patches after the school run. Do I slap one on straight away? Where do I put it?

Sorry can't help with the patches but I'm just wondering what blood tests they do to confirm peri? I've been having night sweats and my GP did a full blood count to rule out things like blood cancers but said there's no point testing hormones levels for peri as it's not diagnostic.

I've put my patch on my thigh but didn't really think it through!! Cause every time I go to the loo I was catching so I have added some micropore tape round the edges. I would pop it straight on.

@CassieJumped All the instructions for the patch will come with the leaflet OR if you know which brand it is, search online as well for the patient info. They are usually put on your bum cheeks.

It will have been a shock if you weren't expecting it and the fluctuating hormones will have contributed to how upsetting it was too.

The Menopause Doctor has lots of good info on the peri menopause. I was cautioned against the patches as they can sometimes be hard to get hold of, and if you're struggling a little with the life change, they're a constant reminder of it. I use the oestrogen gel instead, but already had the coil in which provides the progesterone.

@Fadette

Sorry can't help with the patches but I'm just wondering what blood tests they do to confirm peri? I've been having night sweats and my GP did a full blood count to rule out things like blood cancers but said there's no point testing hormones levels for peri as it's not diagnostic.

I think they tested my fsh levels amongst other things. Wish I had taken a photo of the form now. I think I might ask if they can send me a breakdown of the results so I can see it.

@glitterelf

I've put my patch on my thigh but didn't really think it through!! Cause every time I go to the loo I was catching so I have added some micropore tape round the edges. I would pop it straight on.

Can you swim with it on? I'm away in a couple of weeks and will be in and out of the water 🙈

[quote JinglingHellsBells]@CassieJumped All the instructions for the patch will come with the leaflet OR if you know which brand it is, search online as well for the patient info. They are usually put on your bum cheeks.[/quote]
Thank you. Plenty of room there for a patch!

@BonnesVacances

It will have been a shock if you weren't expecting it and the fluctuating hormones will have contributed to how upsetting it was too.

The Menopause Doctor has lots of good info on the peri menopause. I was cautioned against the patches as they can sometimes be hard to get hold of, and if you're struggling a little with the life change, they're a constant reminder of it. I use the oestrogen gel instead, but already had the coil in which provides the progesterone.

I think that it was such a shock I just went into emotional melt down. I'm still a bit iffy today but I think because I know/hope that help is coming it's made me less stressed about being permanently anxious if that makes sense? I was going to reply to something else in your post but I've forgotten what it was 🙈😂

@BonnesVacances

It will have been a shock if you weren't expecting it and the fluctuating hormones will have contributed to how upsetting it was too.

The Menopause Doctor has lots of good info on the peri menopause. I was cautioned against the patches as they can sometimes be hard to get hold of, and if you're struggling a little with the life change, they're a constant reminder of it. I use the oestrogen gel instead, but already had the coil in which provides the progesterone.

Ah yes, the coil. I actually had it taken out a few years back because I was such a hormonal mess I could barely function. Dh suggested he have the snip so I could have my coil taken out and it did help. I'm wondering how far back these symptoms started now though!

The patches are out of stock. This isn't good news is it 😞

@CassieJumped I'd not get worked up over that because there are plenty of brands of patches. Which one did you have prescribed?

Was it Evorel sequi?

There are many options for HRT including patches, tablets, gel, Mirena plus estrogen, and also the contraceptive pill Qlaira which women your age take as a type of HRT.

Just ask your pharmacist what the equivalent patch is, or have a look at this table for all the brands and types of hrt.

www.menopausematters.co.uk/perimeno.php

You can also mix and match gel or an estrogen only patch with a separate progesterone, or use the tablet form Femoston.

It was Femseven sequi?
I've just spoken to the surgery receptionist and there's nothing they can do until Monday afternoon.
I'd built myself up to getting sorted and this just feels crap.

I've spoken to the pharmacist at the chemist my prescription goes to and found what patches they do have in stock and passed that on to the doctor. She's going to keep trying to order me the other one in. Not much I can do now.