A bit of background. I'm 46, have a mirena coil fitted so no idea when I am pre menstrual.
For the last year or so about a week before I would have a period I would start crying for no reason and struggled to get myself to stop.
I've had a shit few months in that I separated from my partner and sold our home, my brother passed away unexpectedly and I got made redundant in a week. I've not grieved for my brother for to me having to be the strong one for my family.
This weekend was my pmt time I think. Crying for no reason, then I start thinking about my life. I've gone from a beautiful home into a rented property, I literally have nobody that cares about me. My family are crap and don't give two hoots about me. They also live 400 miles away. I've no job and the job I do means I'm not allowed to work anyway. My son has been at his dads for 3 days. I started to think dark thoughts on Friday that if I wasn't here. Who would actually care. I thought how easy it would be to hang myself. The only thing that stopped me was it would be my son who found me. I can't do that to him.
Everyone thinks I've got my shit together and I haven't. In just good at putting on a front. I'm lonely. So so lonely.
I know it's partly the start of the "change". But I just don't know what to do. I've no motivation to do anything. I'm eating rubbish junk food and putting on weight. I just need help.