I didn't have a Menopause

[Anordinarymum]

..as such.

I don't mean I didn't go through it as I am sure I did, but my periods just stopped at 49. I never had hot flushes or night sweats. I did not gain weight or go doolally. I just carried on as normal. When I asked my doctor about it she told me lots of women are the same but you don't hear about them do you?

Just sayin.......

Very glad to hear this. I had an aunt who has told me similar. And I'm not far off it myself.

My mum was the same. She was a bit "angry" and had the rage but mind you she was always like that! I'm 33 now and dreading when my time comes, I've worked with older ladies in the past and it was horrendous for them.

I'm genuinely happy for you. I'm 49 and my periods have just started playing up a bit. No other symptoms. I remain hopeful, Thankyou for letting me know it might be possible to not have a terrible menopause

@Anordinarymum that was my friend’s experience. She’s happy & healthy. In my cohort of friends she is the exception rather than the rule.

Myself, I’m the exception in a different Edward as other than 1 or 2 stray ones I haven’t gone grey ... nearly 60.

EDWARD .... sorry spell check gone nutty ... different WAY.

I’ve always led a very healthy life, slim, never smoked, active etc but unfortunately I developed breast cancer at 47 and have been on Tamoxifen since.
I’m 52 now and really struggle with;
being boiling hot at night
Insomnia
Zero libido
Dry vagina
anxiety

Obviously I can’t have HRT as my cancer was strongly Oestrogen positive. A healthy lifestyle and diet didn’t make any difference to me sadly.

My periods stopped at 41 and ten years later I haven't had one single symptom (was confirmed by my GP I was menopausal).

I'm not the healthiest (disabled) drink, eat meat and smoked until 5 years ago. My mother's periods didn't stop until her mid 50's and none of my sisters have hit it yet.

Think it was my turn to have some good news for a change.

@missyB1 are you sure you can't use Vagifem or Ovestin for the dry vagina? It contains oestrogen but only the tiniest amount, and it's applied locally. Might be worth a check. If you can use it, it's worth it to stop the soreness.

Yes, not all bad. I didn’t notice menopause in my mid 50s as had Mirena in place following awful periods. Highly recommended!

Really interesting op, I'm similar to you. 52, periods just stopped about eighteen months ago. I do get very hot at night, that appears to be my only symptom so far.
I am a vegetarian and haven't drunk milk for 45 years. I do occasionally have cheese.
I exercise for an hour (ish) most days and am a normal weight.
I used to have horrific period pains & awful pmt. so so glad those days are gone. Oh yes and cystic acne, hormones & I never got. Just glad to be rid of them!

Those of you here who didn't notice any menopausal symptoms are the minority. 75-80% of women do. Of those, up to 20% or more have symptoms for more than 15 years - sometimes forever. (My gynae tells me this and they they have women in their 90s on HRT.)

It's worth bearing in mind that the more obvious meno stuff like flushes and sweats can be short term, but there are other things that occur post menopause.

This includes loss of bone density ( 1:3 women have osteoporosis when they are over 50) and heart disease (biggest killer of women, not cancer.) And heart health is directly linked to estrogen being in the body. Also, things like bladder and pelvic floor function can often deteriorate 5 years or more post meno when estrogen falls right off.

I guess this all sounds like doom and gloom but the point is, if you start getting these things a few years down the line, make the connection with menopause and if you are within 10 years of your last period, you can use HRT.

I'm not sure about hormones being in meat- I thought this was banned? Personally I hardly eat any red meat so it doesn't affect me, but I thought the main issue was not hormones in meat but the use of antibiotics especially in factory farmed chicken,

@missyB1

Most menopause specialists would allow you to use vaginal estrogen after cancer as it's such a tiny dose. It's worth asking and talking to your oncologist - or getting them to talk to each other.

@AnotherBiteMe You really ought to consider a bone density scan. Has your GP not flagged up you are at risk from osteoporosis?

As you have an early menopause (before 51) and you were a smoker, that increases your risk.

You won't know you have osteoporosis until it's too late and you fracture something, so please do ask for screening. It's a serious and disabling disease.

@missyB1 I thought there was some research that showed women on Tamoxifene could use hrt? I thought the tamoxifene zapped up the harmful bit of the estrogen re breasts but allowed it to protect bones etc? Might be wrong but have you asked?

My best mate was the same - periods stopped few nights of sweating then over and done with

I was quite similar. The only symptoms I had were peri-menopausal when I would suddenly flood-no warning, no cramps. That was horrible but only happened 3 or 4 times. I did get the flushes but rarely during the day. I was 51.

I think it's good for other women to know it's not always something to dread.

My auntie makes us all eye roll when she says she didn't have menopause symptoms because what she means is she didn't get whatever she thinks of as traditional menopause symptoms.

She actually had quite a few health issues but she didn't attribute them to menopause and she lost a bit of her ability to empathise with other people and said things that caused upset. Her husband developed a silent apology face as well as an "Oh Christ don't set her off" face.

Anyway, toodle pip. I'm off to find a board to post on about how I never had any trouble trying to conceive and gave birth like shelling peas. Might pop onto the miscarriage board to tell them I've never had one.

I didn't read smug.

Thanks for this thread op. I'm in my thirties so hopefully a way off but I definitely had the impression a horrendous menopause was a foregone conclusion. Good to know it might not be.

That 'just sayin' to me read like 'you whingers are making a right fuss over nothing and my GP agrees

Just sayin ...

Anyway, you omitted a very relevant piece of info as you were on artificial hormones with a mirena. It's not very nice to pretend you got through it with no help and gaslight people who need hrt, when you yourself were on progesterone

Again
Just sayin'

I'm going to be unbearably smug then

Never had any problems with my periods. Regular, fairly light and very little pain - mainly just occasional discomfort.

Very straightforward labours - just over 4 hours with my first and 3 with my second (although I did have a missed miscarriage between the two of them, and both labours started at 36 weeks, leading to a 10 day stay in hospital before DC1 deigned to arrive; similar start to labour with DC2 except they arrived immediately meaning a short stay in the neonatal unit)

Perimenopausal in late 40s. Two clues - periods came later and later and then just stopped. The odd hot flush in the early days, easily dealt with by taking Boots Menolieve, and they lasted for less than a year.

My (mostly) low carb diet helps with that and now, aged 60, I don't have any symptoms.

Crossed fingers that nothing else happens/develops!

I can't take HRT because of the risk to me - my mum died from advanced breast cancer, so it's not advised.

I know a lot of women suffer with the menopause, so I've always been very grateful that I haven't/don't.

Thanks @JinglingHellsBells I think it’s time for a trip to the GP to ask for local topical oestrogen.

My auntie makes us all eye roll when she says she didn't have menopause symptoms because what she means is she didn't get whatever she thinks of as traditional menopause symptoms.

^^ This

There are many many women out there who have loads of health issues but never link them to being post-menopause

insomnia
depression
anxiety
'nerves' as they called it in my mum's day
wetting themselves
fractures from doing something simple like tripping over
sore vaginas, burning vulva
aching bones and joints

Often these are misdiagnosed and treated as other things when in fact it's lack of estrogen.

One thing I'd say is don't try to 'guilt trip' women by telling them all they need is a healthy diet and exercise. Might not be intentional, I get that :), and a healthy lifestyle is really important without a doubt. But....

I had the healthiest diet in the world- haven't drunk for over 20 years , masses of fruit and veg, semi vegetarian but eating fish, rarely eat cake, biscuits, crap, make everything from scratch, walked 3 miles a day blah blah... so when I spoke to my meno dr he said there was nothing else left to do - that's why I started HRT.

My mum is in her 90s and has never got rid of insomnia and flushes.

Thank you OP for posting this. I'm in early menopause due to chemo. I also can't have HRT because of my type of cancer. After hearing all the horror stories I've honestly been dreading it on top of everything else. You've given me some hope and I am genuinely very grateful x

I had no menopause symptoms at all, periods just stopped in my late 40s. No hot flushes, mood swings or anything ... and I don't lead a healthy lifestyle ... rarely exercise, always battled with my weight (nothing to do with my age) until I started following low carb eating (thanks to BIWI) ... but that was many years after my menopause.

My mother was the same ... I think it's just down to luck.

I am glad to hear it. I don't see why people see it as smug, when it comes to childbirth we tell the good stories too, so why do we need to scare the younger women by only telling the bad menopause stories?