Meet in the middle at the schultuete shop!

[PiratesKnittingTreasure]

Here we are .

Well, there was a rousing rendition of D Ream's Things Can Only Get Better, and the number of Labour Party voters in the vicinity probably increased quite dramatically.

I can understand your sadness about your DF. My mum has a range of issues I struggle with, but I find 'generous interpretations' of where she's coming from is the only way I manage to keep on an even keel with her.

AArgh, my very long post has got lost!!!!!!!!!!!!

Brief summary is... things much better here, been away just me and dh for 2 days to hotel..very nice, met my Mum to celebrate her birthday, day of retail therapy, gorgeous lunch in a proper restaurant with no children's menu in sight, and a bottle of champagne

Back home now , and really just wanted to sympathise with laG, as an only child my Dad has issues with the fact I've ended up a Mum to 3 noisy boys. It's such a different family life than we had when I was a child. When stefan and tristan were only 4 and 2 , my Dad had problems relating to them, and found them difficult to manage. Now they are 12 and 10 he loves to have them for the weekend. Ethan remains an enigma to him, as he is quite needy and whingy.

And yes, Ethan is very tired reception boy. Still using the melamine plates here, bit bigger than the Ikea rainbow ones though. Also have some with a decent rim round which help Ethan as he struggles with knife and fork. Ethan is more little and often than big meals. We rarely buy him a child's meal when out as he wouldn't eat it all.Or sometimes we buy him one and then give half to Stefan.

Must get on with planning now

Quick post to mark spot as still away but will post properly when I can.

Yes we have had sleep regression lag and major meltdowns (crying at the least thing ) so it may be an age thing secret.

Your mil is a treasure isn't she pirate ? How she produced dh is a mystery but I wonder that about my mil.

deb glad you had a break - sounds lovely.

As you Will have seen from fb , holiday (incl Disney ) big hit- bizarrely mini gig seemed to love Disney which is worrying !

I'm glad you got a nice break away Deb. It sounded great!

Also glad to hear you're having a good holiday Gig - well deserved. Pleased to hear that the mini gigs enjoyed Disney, we're thinking of tagging on a day or two at Disney next year when we go back to France on holiday (going back to the gite we've been to a couple of times), if I can figure out the travel/accommodation etc without doubling the cost of our holiday! Annoyingly, it's too early to look at the budget airline flights to regional airports. It would mean we'd end up at Disney on DS's birthday which I think would be an amazing treat for him.

Not that I'm feeling the love for treating him just now. It's very reassuring to read of challenges others are having with their 4 yr olds and that it's likely to be an age thing but grrrrrrrrr at DS! We've paid for a term of mini-kickers which he has so far refused to go to and DS is currently at his swimming class with him and he's refusing to take part. Apparently he's in the water but screaming the place down. Is it too early for ? I just wish he'd hurry up and get passed whatever phase he's going through. Bedtimes are a real struggle still too and I am just so weary of it, 4 years down the line.

Anyway, I bore myself talking about bedtime dramas so I'll move on! What's everyone up to this weekend? A relatively quiet one here - DS is having someone over for a play date later and I need to take him clothes shopping tomorrow. I've had to send him out in trousers swinging round his ankle, so time for some new ones I think!

Deb, glad you had a well-deserved, good break . I think you're right about the dad/grandad thing too - LG, I think your dad may well find them much easier when they're older. I know that doesn't help your feelings now, but there's still time for him to build a relationship with them x

Secret, I'm so sorry to hear you're still having bedtime battles, that must be immensely stressful . I assume you've tried all the usual stuff like sticker charts, count downs, sanctions, exhausting him!? Have you ever sought any professional help? I just wonder whether an outsider could help see what is triggering his bedtime issues? It's not fair on you or dh to have to cope with this every night . Is he like this when you're away too?

We've had a busy weekend at the fireworks, but a quiet day today as DS1 is back to school tomorrow. Dh has just taken the boys for a walk into town to get a babyccino and I'm just back from the gym and off for a shower x

It's Secret with a pre-season name change!

Yep, we've tried just about everything over the years. Never sought professional help because it's better than it was, and to be honest, he's been a crap sleeper since birth so I think he's just made that way. He's absolutely fine when staying at our parents though! He was absolutely fine last night funnily enough, so hopefully he's starting an ok phase (which he does intermittently). I think he just feels a bit left out when he's in bed and we're downstairs. He thinks it's unfair that me and DH get to share a room and he has to sleep by himself. The other day, when I was telling him that I had to go downstairs to do my 'jobs' (i.e. evening chores) he said that I should phone my office to take the day off to do my jobs, then I could go to bed at the same time as him.

Loved your pics posted on fb this w/e - looks like you had fun at the fireworks and in Brighton. Quiet w/e here. We didn't get organised to go to any fireworks displays unfortunately. There's one tomorrow night in the city but the parking is terrible and it's in an awkward location for us to get to by bus so we'll give it a miss. I'm mostly spending this evening planning my Boxing Day Buffet menu

Thanks Christmas , we did have a lovely time - although the boys were not great when we were at LG's house . Sorry about that LG . I don't know what was wrong with them cos as soon as we left I got a chorus of "I miss Peter, when can we go back?" Grrrrr.

We've never had a problem with the going to bed aspect, our nightmares have always been ridiculously early wakings, but we do seem to have turned a bit of a corner with this since dh gave DS1 a digital clock and he's not allowed out of bed until the 1st number says 7 ! It has absolutely transformed his sleep, DS2's sleep and consequently ours. He was getting up at 5.30 until then and it was killing us all .

Don't know whether this would work for bedtimes? Tell him what the digital clock will read xxx number when it's bedtime and he needs to be in bed, lights out by then? DS1 feels very very grown up with his new digital clock cos he thinks he can tell the time !

In other news, was supposed to be having a lovely grown up lunch with Gig yesterday but DS2 selfishly ruined my plans by getting ill . Gig, am checking diary commitments to try and rearrange!

Got to go - on line Christmas shopping calls .

Yay, for Christmas shopping. I have some to do myself as it happens.. Glad that the clock has made a difference to your early mornings. We have a clock here - it's not really helped.

Sorry DS2 has been poorly - I hope he's much better soon.

Right, off to see what's happening on the election front!

Waves to all (and waiting for those diary dates pirate) - need to do some Christmas shopping but at a bit of a loss what to buy for dh and people haven't yet bought for.

I second the clock helping as big gig was doing the early waking too and it has helped (star charts work a treat here). Am afraid on going to bed , it is case of being tough as big gig will try on most excuses if can get away with it (little gig seems to have turned corner on wanting to keep us company in the evenings).

Am still feeling pretty tired (which isn't uncommon as can take a few months to recover from chemo) and a bit frustrated at myself as would like to be more active . Feel sorry for dh and girls as not nice to have a mum like this. But suppose I am slowly improving (and need to remember this) as did manage to get out and about with them last week.

Just messaged you Gig .

Sorry to hear you're still feeling tired, but it is inevitable given what you've been through both emotionally and physically over the last year x

I've just entered the Moonwalk for next year - definitely need some butt kicking on the getting fit thing and hopefully this will give me the incentive I need .

Secret, real sympathies on the sleep. Maybe try again with the clock? We do try things and then give them up and try them again - this sometimes works .

Had a crap day at work (big CP case ) and counting down the days til I finish now. CM is doing my head into .

Right, reading homework time now - both boys are being monsters, happy days!

Yep- can do that date pirate. Sorry work hard and what's up with cm?

Saw therapist today which was helpful- at the moment I think it is not just physical but emotional shift am dealing with. However I have some ideas of what I want to do (may involve studying again) as I am worried about drifting along "being ill" and don't want to do that.

Have any of your dc had a hearing test? Big gig had one at school and needs a repeat test. They tested her hearing at birth and I haven't noticed any issues (that weren't down to selective deafness) .my dad reckons it was her being bored/in attentive (apparently I was the same ) and my instinct is she is fine but obviously I am not dismissing it out of hand.

DS1 has his hearing test tomorrow - I think your instinct/your dad's may be right, hearing in kids is notoriously difficult to check because they are sometimes just not interested rather than not hearing! Good they are re-testing to be sure.

Studying sounds like a really good idea - any thoughts on what?

CM constantly giving me grief about DS2's behaviour. God, I know he can be a challenge but she is always on his case and I think that's part of the problem . He's the only child she minds now and I think he is really bored - he's a socialable and friendly little kid and doesn't like being on his own, plus he's used to being glued to his big bro and is missing him badly. I just don't think she's handling it very well and I end up with a catalogue of moans at the end of the day . Only 6 more weeks!

Am not surprised he is bored (and I feel your pain about moaning cm- old nanny used to do this . My favourite was mini gig having tantrums at 6 weeks old ). He is a lovely lively little boy who will try to test boundaries if he is bored.

Gig, Ethan had a hearing test as , and his hearing was down , it was glue ear. It was repeated after 6 months and it had cleared itself so no need for gromits. Could be that your dd's ears are slightly blocked due to a cold, and like Ethan it will drain away.

hello all, off to bed now, just checking in

Thanks for that deb- I am pretty sure it's not a major issue but will involve another test. I should resign myself to getting familiar with all areas of the health service

What is everyone up to this weekend? Am off to watch Lord Mayors show (my idea of hell but big gig excited).

Just realised I haven't posted for a week.

Firstly, Deb, thanks for sharing your experiences with your dad and your boys. It made me feel better to think that I'm not alone in this predicament. We have both sets of GPs coming here for Xmas at the same time so plenty of opportunity for harmonious family celebrations!

Gig - on the hearing front, no test for DS1 yet. DS2 failed his newborn hearing tests and got referred up two further tiers of testing before he was pronounced to be normal. Not really relevant to you, but at the time I did worry a bit. Hey! Congratulations on completing your chemo. Sorry that it's a bit bewildering moving on from it. Studying sounds like a good idea, I will be interested to hear about what you are thinking of.

Christmas. Sorry that bedtimes are still hideous. I babysat for a friend last night who has a 3 yo and a 1 yo who are both hideous sleepers. I have leant her the book I leant you . They have never left the 1 yo before and in the last week his sleep has got even worse. I turned up the 1yo was already asleep and the 3yo had a story and then that was it for the evening, not a peep thereafter

Pirate - don't worry about your boys. I thought they were fine. DS1 was not on great form behaviour wise for most of half term himself. He is much happier now he is back at school.

Not much on this weekend. It is birthday season in our family (3 in a week) so there may be a bit of cake baking this afternoon and present shopping for DH (a photo printer).

Quick post to mark spot. Glad the boom doing the rounds LaG I appreciate all the support on the sleeping front, though typically as always, as soon as I have a moan on here, he's not been too bad the last few days

Gig, studying sounds like a good idea - any thoughts on what yet?

Not much going on here - DH has been away, so had a busy few days trying to entertain DS. Now got a glass of wine and feet up watching X factor!

Sorry not to post about anything else - my brain is like mush. Will try and read again/post properly tomorrow!

Forgot to say, had a classic chat with a smug mother of a boy and a girl today - she commented that DS was very well behaved and asked if it was because he spent so much time with girls (DS is very friendly with her daughter at nursery). I inwardly had a wry smile and thought of you all!

Aha, smug mothers are everywhere! Speaking of which, there was a bit of extreme stealth/blatant boasting on my FB timeline yesterday from someone we all know.

DS in bed and asleep in 20 minutes!

Like Pirate I'm not-so-accidentally fb friends with others, but could probably guess who you're talking about LaG. Am very nosy and want to know though...

Yay for good bedtimes - sadly not for mini gig who felt we needed more of her tonight!

I think I know who you mean - was it related to school activities by chance lag

Oh and maybe I am doing it wrong but tiredness or just a phase has meant that big gig has been very High maintenance this weekend. Novelty of doing reading books wearing off so some coercion needed there.

Also enjoyed being the Boring parent yesterday as took her to watch Lord Mayors show on a boat so was keeping close eye on her . Her cousins were there and as older and parents more interested in drinking, we got a lot of attitude about how didn't need to look after her/ go away etc. probably not helped by fact she would only eat chocolate.

So am defo not a smug mum of girls

Oh, there's nothing more helpful than someone telling you how you should be parenting differently...

I'd be cautious on a boat too Gig. Sorry you've had a high maintenance w/e Gig - I know how that feels!

It is annoying ESP when it is coming from your own child (should have made that more clear ). I could hear myself getting more cross as day went on and was eyeing the longingly by bedtime. Poor big gig .

Ah right, that makes sense. Pesky 4 year olds and asserting themselves!