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When meeting up take sensible precautions. Meet in a public place and let others know where you are going.

Secret Garden

905 replies

BriansMum · 07/06/2011 21:07

Hope this works, a shiny new thread girls - come on in Smile.

OP posts:
WhatWouldLeoDo · 12/11/2011 08:48

Should say, Whittard code finishes today.

Great to hear that you're all getting some sleep - am I reading it right, is DS2 sleeping on your floor? Our bedtime battles still appear to be over. After Christmas I'd like to start working on getting him to sleep all night in his own bed.

Gigondas - I hated going out for drinks with people when I was pregnant. I could never be a teetotaller - people talk such rubbish when they're drinking and the only way to beat them is to join them Grin. A bit Sad for your friend's DS, what a mean thing to say. I hope you get a nice restful weekend - I'm hanging out with DS today (probably cake baking) and catching up on a few things tomorrow, like buying paint to decorate DS's room next week. We've finally decided to go ahead and decorate even though we'll hopefully move next year. We were going to move him into the bigger second bedroom, but I think it will look better set out as a double bedroom for pics/viewings etc although it is a bit cluttered.

LaG, encouraging news about the viewings. Fingers crossed something comes from it. Did I see that DS2 has had his 2nd birthday via fb pics? Did you all have fun?

Deb, how's things with the Rectory? Do you have any more info about the new builds?

Stitching, I'm sorry to read that there's not much going on the work front. How frustrating for you. I hope something turns up soon, I bet you'd be an asset to any school. Are you still doing the statements?

Well, I suppose I should get DS and I dressed - I foresee a very lazy morning!

Gigondas · 12/11/2011 11:24

Did some Xmas shopping after my rant last night (Blush feel lot better for good night sleep). Big fans of quid co here- you can get some good cash back and discounts so well worth joining .

At swimming with e (if she wasn't so busy chatting and playing the Olympics would beckon Wink), then easy afternoon and dinner out tonight. I might brave cooking with e too Leo but after she has licked bowl her interest wanes.

WhatWouldLeoDo · 12/11/2011 14:03

Lazy day here, just been to get DS some new shoes and ended up getting some boot style waterproof ones (gotta be prepared for the winter weather here Wink) and they were £56! Gulp.

I've used quidco in the past but tend to favour topcashback as there are no charges. Definitely worth using. You can convert cash to amazon vouchers which gives you an additional top up. Right, must finish lunch and do something about my midden of a home Blush!

WhatWouldLeoDo · 12/11/2011 14:03

Enjoy your dinner out Gig!

StitchingMoss · 13/11/2011 12:51

Hi all, just marking my space be back to post later - waiting for gig and dh and dd to turn up for lunch Smile.

StitchingMoss · 13/11/2011 20:20

Back again Grin!

Nearly ended up with a 2nd trip to A&E tonight with DS2 Sad although I can't remember whether I mentioned the first one on here! He fell over and cut his ear open on my friend's coffee table this afternoon - we'd only popped round on the way back from the park to pick something up and he managed to damage himself Blush.

Had a lovely afternoon with gig and her dh and dd. The DC played beautifully together - lots of Fireman Sam and Fireman Penny and "eating biscuits and drinking tea" role play Grin. Don't know where they get that from Blush!

Leo, no more statements - loads of work to do but no money in the pot to pay me Sad Angry. It's the same old story across the whole public sector at the moment. Saw my old counsellor for first time on Friday (I saw her when pg with DS1 to help with AND) and she was great - talked over job options and what I can do to help myself in the next few months. I'm going to push ahead with starting up my own gardening business and see what happens with the teaching. Wish me luck!

disguisedeb · 13/11/2011 23:29

Good Luck Stitching Smile hope ds2 is OK

Gig did you resist the calendar?

Leo, also a fan of top cashback, just shopped from ELC, TOYS gets you 20% off until tomorrow I think and top cashback give you another 5%

Mum's here this weekend, took her to rectory and also to see new houses , rectory was the winner but unfortunately they still haven't accepted our offer.Hoping to speak to estate agent tomorrow about it.Had a lovely day today making it a special Birthday for Mum after my Uncle.we've had balloons and banners, streamers on her bedroom door, cake, presents and lunch out.

StitchingMoss · 14/11/2011 07:38

That's so sweet Deb, bet your mum really appreciated that Smile.

How frustrating about the offer on the rectory Sad - hope the estate agent can do something.

DS2's ear seems to have healed nicely this morning thank god. Until next time Blush.

WhatWouldLeoDo · 14/11/2011 08:09

Xmas Grin ooh, festive smileys!

WhatWouldLeoDo · 14/11/2011 08:10

Gah, that didn't work.

WhatWouldLeoDo · 14/11/2011 12:10

Hmm, I'm sure I saw festive smileys on another post earlier. Not to worry.

Stitching - glad that you averted an A&E trip and that you had a nice time with Gig and family yesterday. Am with you on the [anger] at cuts. I've read a few things lately that all point to the most disadvantaged in our our society faring the worst of the cuts. It's quite frightening. I hope you find something suitable soon and good luck with the gardening business (do you cover Scotland Wink).

Deb - did you find out any more about the house today? LaG, how's things with your house situation.

I spotted a rarely available house that we could afford in a perfect area/catchment yesterday but it's only two bedrooms. Now, if we were 100% that our family was complete it would be fine. Sigh. It's in such a good location.

LaGuerta · 14/11/2011 21:13

Only house news is that the buyer who was gazundered has written us a nice letter sounding keen on the house still, but not yet having found a new buyer.

Me, ds1 and ds2 have all got colds at the moment. DS1 has been very sorry for himself for about 5 days, but I think is perking up today.

Leo - the house must be tempting. Any loft conversion potential? Do you have in mind a point when you will decide once and for all whether to have another or not (once the exams are done?), or is it something that is rumbling around in the back of your head?

Gig - coming back to the insensitive "two kids is hard" chat. Two kids is hard, but then one is hard too, and you know that anyway. Your comments made me smile because after the hen do, one of the hens who only turned up for a few hours and I hadn't had chance to speak to, emailed everyone afterwards to say sorry for moaning about how hard family life is especially to the pregnant ladies there! She has a 6yo and 4yo twins, and a husband who has a crazy busy demanding job.

Better post as I am getting sidetracked.

StitchingMoss · 15/11/2011 14:29

That was sweet of your buyer to do that LG Smile. Doesn't help the situation though does it Sad.

House sounds interesting Leo, but what a dilemma Confused. How big is the bedroom? Our house is only two bedrooms but the boys will share until we can afford an extension/house move. I suppose this would be harder with a larger age gap, but not impossible. Any room for extension/loft extension?

Gig, I agree with LG that two kids is harder and not so hard as one. As I said the other day it is all so dependent on what the kids are like. I find it hard being out and about with both my two because DS2 is so unpredictable and such a daredevil, but then by the time your DD2 is mobile DD1 will be much older and that will help.

Btw, I have found a job to apply for! Grin It's a tiny village school which is church aided, not my cup of tea at all, but it's KS2 and it's p/t and it starts in January and my CM has okayed the hours, and I know the HT vaguely! Wish me luck!

Gigondas · 15/11/2011 19:31

Fingers crossed re job stitching . And glad ds2 ok after scare (we' did have a lovely lunch btw).

Lag agree it's nice of buyer. It more positive news would be better.

Leo the house sounds good - can you extend? I don't think sharing bad - baby will go in with dd when she arrives.

Deb any news from estate agents?

Ok - we had our first reading book home and am a bit Hmm as nanny filled the comment but in. Don't get m wrong it's good she is interested but need to find a line between supervising what nanny does (she can be a bit over enthusiastic and i have some minor issues on how she does stuff hence why am not into abdicating all responsibility here) and not being ott. Also how long are you meant to keep books for ? That may solve issue if nanny does one lot of reading then dh or I hear if on another day .

Also anyone else looking forward to new series of the kiliing starting?

LaGuerta · 15/11/2011 22:15

No idea on reading books sorry.

Not seen "the killing" yet but would like to. This week we are enjoying "fresh meat" (student comedy by peep show writers) most night's.

Stitching, good luck for the job opportunity.

Leo - I forgot to answer your question about DS1s sleeping habits. Yes his preference for the last 3-4 weeks has been the floor next to our bed. We had had a few terrible weeks where he wouldn't stay in his room and was screaming the house down at all hours. Then one night he found a pillow that I had chucked in the floor and I woke to find him on the carpet and dh got his duvet. We now pull out a spare double summer duvet and pillow for him so it's like a sleeping bag and each night he transfers into our room. He sleeps really well there and as he isn't actually in our bed we sleep too. DS2 also gets his own room to be noisy in. So whilst I feel bad about it, it seems to be a good compromise for now.

I have become quite worried about DS1 over the Autumn. He has become quite anxious as evidenced by the sleep problems and biting not just his fingernails but also his fingers to the point where they are raw (eczema does not help). I don't really know what to do apart from be there for him, be reassuring, and yet stick to my guns with him when he crosses the line. I am assuming he is worrying about house moving and is missing DH who is scarcly around in the week. There is also a sibling jealousy issue too. He also seems less keen on nursery school bu I think he is mostly saying that for attention and because DS2 stays with me.

Sorry, iPhone not really ideal device to be writing this all down, hence why I haven't been into it before.

It occurred to me the other day that he needs more adults who love him around on a day to day basis, and all he really gets is me. Cos he doesn't see dh in the week and all 4 GPs are far flung and come for long weekends now and again. Sad

StitchingMoss · 16/11/2011 16:15

Can't help on reading books either I'm afraid - nowhere near that stage!

LG, Sad about DS1 but I wouldn't be too hard on yourself. My DC see more of their dad than yours do (but not as much since the new job) but don't see much of their GPs and DS1 is having similar issues to your DS1 now. The last two mornings he's been to pre-school (last Thurs and yesterday) he has literally cried the whole way there and shouted at me that he doesn't want to go, don't make me, I won't play, you are cruel mummy Sad Blush. It breaks my heart and the staff have been brilliant about it, but what can I do? He seems so desperately tired at the moment and just wants to be still, begging to go to bed at 5pm Shock and so listless. I even stupidly googled "extreme tiredness, etc" in toddlers and scared myself silly Blush.

I think it's such a tough age for them with so many adjustments - and they're so young for their year group too. I'm seriously thinking about starting DS1 p/t at school nxt September cos I just don't know whether he'll cope with f/t.

Anyway, not helping am I Blush. Re: the sleep thing, if you and him are sleeping then it works! And I think the rest of it will be helped when you move (although I appreciate that's not helpful as you're obviously trying on that front Blush).

Rabbiting now. V tired - boys up us up early and been out all day. Going to veg in front of Mike the Knight Smile.

WhatWouldLeoDo · 16/11/2011 16:38

You should all move to Scotland - then they'd have two years before they start school! Grin

Will come back and reply properly later!

Gigondas · 16/11/2011 17:21

Lag - I think if sleeping on your floor helps ds1 and you all get some sleep then go with it. I have a friend where one of her dc used to come in to them (and still does if unsettled) but grew out of it. I think it likely ds1 won't stay doing this forever but the benefit of sleep got to help.

I assume he is otherwise healthy - I remember he has had some nasty colds so that probably doesn't help. Dd far more clingy when sick.

I don't really have any advice on other things as I think they sound very plausible as to why ds1 unhappy (nursery teacher has mentioned a few times that moving house is profoundly unsettling for kids this age). Is dh able to do stuff with him at weekend? One on one might be best if ds2 jealousy an issue (I am not ignoring ds2 but doesn't sound like he is as unsettled ). Am I right in thinkjng they did kiddy rugby? Swimming and then dare I say it McDonald's or Babycino with dad usually acts well if dh has been away (it does unsettle e and she will be decidedly off with dh if not around).

The reading book (there are no actual words in it ) solved by nanny thread. I am a bitHmm as thought this wasn't until next year (indeed that was implied at talk last week). Keeping her interest in it when she could watch mike the knight or numberjacks will be tricky?

Aibu if I had a star on the chart for going a day without numberjacks?

Stitching - I can see your point re being young for year . I do think there is some logic to holding off and being more Scottish Wink

Will check that prog out lag- its thin pickings for watching when knitting at te minute

WhatWouldLeoDo · 16/11/2011 19:07

Aarrrrggghhhhh, I'm really incensed by a post in Christmas. Since when did how many Christmas presents you buy your child be used to judge your class/wealth/ability to teach your kids the value of things etc etc? Only on MN. Grrrrrr.

I will come back and reply properly to posts later I promise!

Gigondas · 16/11/2011 19:51

Where?

StitchingMoss · 16/11/2011 20:36

Come on Leo, you need to link! Grin

Grin at star for day without Numberjacks! Saw Mike the Knight for the first time today - DS2 was thrilled to have a programme with his name in it Grin!

Right off to post in education for help with my visit next week Smile.

disguisedeb · 16/11/2011 21:42

Stitching, good luck for the job, really, really hope it goes well this time.

Lag, sorry to hear about your worries about ds1, think Gig has some good ideas for weekend time with daddy. Also agree about sleeping on floor, if it means you all sleep then why not.Have you mentioned the nail/finger biting to Dr/health visitor?

Leo step away from the Christmas thread

House - someone else has made an offer today of 280,000, so we either match it and hope that they go with us as we can proceed immediately and the vicar likes us Wink or decide that enough's enough and walk away, I'm reluctant to do this but dh is having wobbles

WhatWouldLeoDo · 16/11/2011 21:43

Grin at all the interest in the Christmas thread. It was just one post really, but it summed up a vibe that's on here sometimes that REALLY annoys me. There's this kind of competitiveness buy-the-least one upmanship that goes on about Christmas presents. Along with a snotty view that people who buy lots of presents are the ones who can least afford it, on benefits, getting into debt etc. I know one or two people like this in RL, lots of 'ooh, haven't you bought DS a lot for Christmas' I only buy DD one or two things from a charity shop. Neglecting to mention the islabike, micro scooter, kidkraft kitchen etc etc that dear old granny buys, or the boxes of brio that uncle whatshisface had in the loft. Anyway the post is in this thread.

Onto other things... Thanks for all the comments on the house. It'll probably have been sold by the time we start looking, but if it isn't then we'll go and have a look at it. Not sure re: extension potential - the loft appears to be split into a small room used as a study and storage space. Not sure why they didn't convert it into a bedroom - could be cost or it might be that there's nowhere to put stairs in. The second bedroom looks an ok size - they have bunk beds in it at the moment. I don't have a problem with sharing but I guess it would depend on how much space there was generally. It's so hard to get something in our price bracket in the best catchments in Edinburgh - it's almost London like that way! Most of the properties are either big detached/semi-detatched at £400K plus or the traditional tenements which can be anything from £300K upwards (tenement flats in Edin are big but expensive on account of location).

Re: the possibility of a second DC, I certainly think we'll give it a bash, but we're giving ourselves a short window of opportunity. It's been a difficult decision for us. There's a lot of sacrifices for us (and more importantly DS) in having a second child but at the same time I do get a bit gooey at the sight of a newborn and I think it would be lovely for DS to have a sibling. In an ideal world we'd have had DS a bit sooner and aimed for a slightly shorter age gap. But who knows, we might not be lucky (something I'm quite conscious of) so we'll see how it goes.

LaG - I'm in the 'what matters is what works' when it comes to getting sleep Grin. DS1 won't sleep on your floor forever. I'm sorry to hear about the anxiety though. Funnily enough, DS has been a bit clingy and cuddly lately - I wonder if it's a bit of a stage at this age but it's been compounded by the whole moving thing for you? If he's jealous of the time your spending with DS2 is there any opportunity to spend more one on one time with him at the weekend?

I was also a bit Shock at your DD having a reading book Gig. I'm quite relieved to hear there's no words in it Grin. I can imagine that lots of nannies do that kind of thing with their charges but I would have thought that would be pre-agreed with the parents.

I watched The Killing Gig. I found it a wee bit long and unfortunately the end was inadvertently leaked to me. The next series only looks like 10 episodes though which is better I think.

Ok, this is a truly mammoth post so I should sign off. Stitching great news about having a job to apply for though it made me chuckle a bit that it was a church school Wink

Gigondas · 16/11/2011 21:44

Tricky one- can you offer and If not accepted go for one of new builds you mention.

What I can't get over on Christmas threads is all theloons enthusiasts doing home made stuff.

WhatWouldLeoDo · 16/11/2011 21:48

Oops, x-posted. Ooh, dilemma on the house. Is that much higher than your original offer Deb? I can't remember if you said how much.

On the home made threads, I have to confess that I've made some Christmas pudding vodka, but that's allowed right? Wink I'm also going to make some other food stuff with DS like peppermint creams etc for him to give to his GPs.