I like a guy, now what?

[thesunshinesbrightly]

I am single, out of a controlling relationship, i swore i would never like a man again, but i do, but i dont know if he likes me, i dont know if i want a relationship, but i do like him, do i tell him or leave it be, sorry this is gibberish, any advice welcome, thankyou.

best of luck sunshine

as for advice? i recall talking drivvel the other night - glad it made sense to you

ok, i have spoke to him on a networking site and i'm not really feeling the y'know vibe, so i'm gonna leave it

a networking site - not a mner surely??

as for the lack of the right vibes -

am sure mr right is lurking somewhere - you just have to track him down, tie him up etc...oops - just mean so he doesnt do a runner of course

not not MN

vibes, well they were ok but he was not taking the bait, if you know what i mean.

of course i knew what you meant

you knew what i meant - can see we're on the same wavelength then

i guess the 'hows about it then love' line didnt do the trick - you could always try the old faithfull 'grab your coat, youve pulled' - tho maybe he bats for the other side

i didnt say that!!

he must bat for the other side, if he doesnt want this!!!

i didnt ask him directly, i was flirting y'know as you do, but their was nothing, not fancy a shag![rin] or meeting up NOTHING! just chat!!!!!

just wanting to chat - how dare he not be interested!!!

and i should have warned you - my advice isnt exactly 100% - you should have ignored it.

so where'd you go, if you could loose the kids somewhere? my homepage thingy keeps putting up a pic of a beach - looks inviting

And i trusted you, i am very dissapointed in you Mr Jamestkirk beach - sound's good too me.

i know, as if he's not interested, i dont do knock back's well!! maybe he's just stupid???

god, i can't make it anymore obvious! men such a waste of time

what have you said??

Nothing not you,silly, why do they alway's act dumb ? i'm not used to chasing men, do think i should give up??

didnt mean to me - just had to know how obvious you were making it for him to not take the bait

and tho my record so far for advice is a bit off - i'd say give it up - if he's at all interested he'll make the effort to chase you, cos youre worth it

oh right crossed wires, well i have known him for a long time and only recently got back in touch and he knows i used too like him, but i didnt bother doing anything about it, i was young.

I doubt he will chase he is not the chasing type, i think, i will just leave it, he cant like me if he's not bothered eh?

arghh - can see i'm digging myself into a bit of a hole - didnt mean he didnt like you - and now youve said a bit more - he maybe sees you more as a mate - hence being happy to chat but not wanting to go any further... dig, dig, dig...

Sorry to interrupt your happy conversation but I've been keeping an eye on you two. I have the same issue/problem sunshine, so I have a vested interest in the outcome.

Give us a word by word description of how you made it obvious and why you assume he didn't take the bait. Please?

ooooh a stranger!!!

Hi queenofdenial2009,

well, we were chatting about what he's been up too, he said that he's changed now and not the same as he used too be, and i said he still makes me feel the same as he used too.

really couldnt make it anymore obvious, so he obviously doesnt want too know....

i agree with james he probley just wants to be friend's

Queenofdenial2009,

Tell us about you, cant say i will be of much help, but you never know

Well, I'm not convinced he said he wasn't interested based on that. Two responses that might have given you a clearer idea would have been if you said that you regretted not going for it back in the day, you know saying that you really liked him the way he was then. Or you could say, how have you changed, I'd like to get to know you a lot better because I really liked the old you. That sounds a bit more like flirting to me.

But I'm great at giving advice and rubbish at taking it.

My situation is that my crush is someone who treats me for problems I have with my teeth, he's a specialist at the hospital. I also work in healthcare so we have very good conversations. Everytime I see him (and this has been going on for over a year now), we spend about 90% of the time talking about the meaning of life and about 10% him actually doing anything. I'm always there for over an hour, on occasion somebody has been sent in to pull him out as other patients are waiting.

I too was in a controlling and abusive relationship and he knows about this, as it has had a big impact on my health, yes including my teeth. He has been so kind and caring and I feel like I could really trust him.

He is pretty flirty with me and always seems pleased to see me. But here's the thing - it's completely unethical for a clinician to make a move on a patient and he's also a decent man who wouldn't want to be inappropriate knowing what he does about my ex. My feelings verge towards the extremely unprofessional and I spend a slightly inappropriate amount of time thinking (fantasising?) about him.

Also, on a slightly deeper note, I think being in a controlling relationship really messes with your head. Above all, you can really doubt yourself and all your instincts. That's probably part of the reason we're finding it harder to gauge if they really do like us. Still not sure how to get them to ask us out though .

yes,i have been in a controlling relationship so i totally know how you feel,i agree with you.

cant you change specialist and go for it, or does that matter if you ask him?

i think we should bite the bullet and ask them, but easier said then done, i have spoken to his relative and she said he loved talking to me again, what doe's that mean? he is quite shy, i think.

Am i all alone

why so blue?...

well i thought it was funny - will have to return to ebay and my search for a new car.

very witty, well done

oooooo new car, what you looking for??

damn cant get the hang of dis, bum back