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Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

I am bored of being lonely

27 replies

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 20:37

It is so boring isn't it ? I mean there are only so many conversations I can have with myself.

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avenanap · 15/05/2008 20:40

So why don't you do something about it?

Arrange a coffee morning with some normal mums from school, join a club, do a course. Get out there and show the world the fantastic person that you are.

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 20:41

I don't speak to any school mums really. I used to, but something happened and now I stand elsewhere in the playground.

I am so not a meeting and greeting people type of person.

OP posts:
CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 20:41

I don't speak to any school mums really. I used to, but something happened and now I stand elsewhere in the playground.

I am so not a meeting and greeting people type of person.

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avenanap · 15/05/2008 20:43

Well, if you want to have a converstion with an adult you have to be brave. What about a dance class? I bet there are loads of things you can do. Do you not feel very confident?

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 20:45

Ohhhhh no, not a dance class.

Someone will come along in a mo, and say 'haven't we been throught this already cracker'.

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avenanap · 15/05/2008 20:50

Ok, when you lovely children are older and they are telling their lovely children about you, what would you want them to tell them? About your fun loving zest for life or your shyness?

If you want to have a real conversation with real people you have to get out there and do something about it. Life doesn't come to you, you have to go and grab it with both hands before it passes you by.

Pottery classes are always good for some fun. Or an art class. Find something that you are interested in. Your children will see you in a whole different light and it will encourage them to do things for themselves.

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 20:53

|They'd have absolutly nothing interesting to tell them about me at all if i am really honest.

OP posts:
avenanap · 15/05/2008 20:54

So do something about it then.

Iota · 15/05/2008 20:55

what's happening on the job front, nut?

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 20:56

That would be a big fat nothing Iota. I am still applying for stuff, and still not getting anywhere.

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blinkingthreetimes · 15/05/2008 20:57

Hope you are ok fwiw I am bored shitless too and hate trying to make friends with ppl who already have their own cliques iyswim?

Iota · 15/05/2008 20:58

oh that's a shame. what about the course and the maths/english thing?

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 21:00

The maths course is full so I have to wait until Sept.

I was supposed to start the English tommorow but the tutor rang me today to say he had looked at my forms sent over by the library and his class will be too easy, I need the other class so I have to ring the library again tommorow.

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Iota · 15/05/2008 21:06

ho hum, more delays!

hope you can get on the English one soon, then at least you will be out meeting people

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 21:08

Yeah, i think i might end up having to wait until sept for both though because as the lady who i saw at the library pointed out, they will all be finnishing off and packing up in the next few weeks, as the courses wind down mid june.

I did have some info come today about an IT course, but they forgot to put the price of the course and the enrolement form in my pack, so will be ringing them tommorow.

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Iota · 15/05/2008 21:14

I hope something turns up for you soon

CrackerOfNuts · 15/05/2008 21:14

Thanks

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LonelySingleMummy · 15/05/2008 21:19

Hi I am new to this site and have been meaning to join something like this for ages. I have mum friends but they are all attached and it's different being alone. You're never sure whether you're doing the right thing or if there's a better way... There's just no-one to run things by.
Anyway, I hope you find something soon and chin up, it could be much worse

M x

tortoise · 15/05/2008 21:25

The evenings are the worst time i find. Daytime i have plenty to keep me busy.
Am slowly getting better at talking to others but find it really hard, and can't class them all as friends as they have their own group of friends.

I do have some good friends but they all have dps/dhs so are busy at the weekends.

gillybean2 · 15/05/2008 21:25

It's so hard to meet people I find too. Other mum's in the playground really do seem to find single mum's a threat and even the two good friends I have rarely invite me around because I'm an odd number at their dinner parties and can't afford to reciprocate and have to bring my child with me too...

And the two other recently single mum's at school are happy to chat in teh playground, and one is always saying 'oh i'll go out with you', but is only now just realising taht being single pretty much equals having no money for a social life!

The only solution is really to find ways of filling your time and to find activities you can join which people go too as a single person (even if they are not single)

I do try and keep my days full now, but I still wonder how I'm ever going to meet someone if I can't afford to go out socially and I live in the back of beyond which narrows down the options on meeting someone anyway.

However, I have joined a local lone parent group which has been really good for finding people in my same situation and to have someone to go along to things with and just to have a little adult company once a month and know there are people on the end of the phone I can call now.

What about a hobby or activity you can do at home to fill in your time? Cross stitch, crafting or something like that? Then you might find a local group you can join. Or what about the WI? You might find you're welcomed at your local group as a younger member, plus actually not everyone there is over 80. And it's guaranteed everyone there has come alone so no being the only one not in a couple to worry about! ;)

There's always times when you're going to feel alone though and thus lonely. Accept it as part of your life as a single parent, have you moment of self pity, and then move on to filling your time with more practical stuff. Easier said than done i know.

And if anyone can offer you some practical tips on finding and making real friendships I'll be all ears myself as I find it almost impossible no matter how hard i try.

LonelySingleMummy · 24/05/2008 00:14

Hi Cracker. LSM again.
All single parents out there, get in touch if you want to natter anytime. Also try out : www.netmums.com/h/n/SUPPORT/HOME/ALL/455//

They have a meet a mum local to you page :p

singledadofthree · 24/05/2008 01:47

am bored with it too nutty - tho had the pieasure of being late taxi driver tonight - wow, friday night out parking with the stretch limos in me little escort

if youre an indiana jones fan just shout 'oi, i wanna go to the pictures'. will find a friday night free i'm sure. will keep youre ex muttering for a while

littlewoman · 24/05/2008 01:49

Get your coat, nutty, get your coat

singledadofthree · 24/05/2008 01:49

and ignore the typos - has been a long day/week.

lou33 · 24/05/2008 03:09

nutty, you are one of the few people i feel like i want to make an effort for, i wish i was closer

anyone who says that we have heard it before, is only because we want to help you move on, it is not with malice

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