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Original poster

Father not looking after child correctly

56 replies

Dolly1991as · 26/10/2022 12:51

I don’t know what to do. I’m not with my child’s father and he isn’t looking after my child correctly.
My child is 5 years old. he doesn’t brush her teeth. Brush her hair and the clothes are never ironed. She comes home with food on her face. It’s a serious problem

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liveforsummer · 26/10/2022 17:24

Towelling · 26/10/2022 17:16

I’m surprised by these responses. Imo not washing a child/brushing their teeth does amount to neglect. Obviously a 5 year old is not going to/should not be expected to do this independently. Can you have an informal discussion with NSPCC about it? Or talk to a solicitor about reducing contact?

Because I've been there and if not brushing teeth was the only thing I had to be concerned about I'd be happy. I can assure you courts and SS don't even have that on their radar

Ted27 · 26/10/2022 17:33

@Towelling
I'm.an adoptive parent whose child was removed from his birth family because of neglect.
I can assure that brushing teeth was the least of his worries.
OK so it's not great, but she is clean and fed.
NSPCC would not be interested in lack of teeth cleaning.

Of more concern is the meltdowns - what is causing them?

WeeblesWibbleWobble · 26/10/2022 23:30

At 5. Clean own face.
Can most likely brush hair even if not properly. Dd does and shes younger and has hair to her hips. Some brushing is better than none

Same with teeth. She should do them even if its not properly. Its better than nothing. And a kid mouthwash.

Ironed clothes no issue!

I think you're being a bit ridiculous tbh.
You can't control what he does likewise he cant control what you do.
No safeguarding issues so let it lie

Justmeandme19 · 27/10/2022 11:27

These are totally minor things even brushing the teeth. From a parent who's children can not see their father due to safeguarding conserns. (No contact order).
Please think long and hard about choosing your battles. Your child will be negatively affected by the animosity between you both. This is a bigger consern than not brushing teeth. Also I the eyes of the law parenting only had to be "good enough".
Take a deep breath, brush the childs teeth well before they go, don't sweat the little stuff. As it could be so so much worse.

comical2023 · 18/12/2022 15:34

How do you know she’s not cleaning her teeth?

rest sounds annoying but she has clean knickers which is always a win in my book and her clothes are clean. Ironing is unecessary

Mumuser124 · 18/12/2022 22:57

I do not know a single person who irons clothes but he needs to be brushing her teeth.

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