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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

Baby cries all the time

72 replies

WhoSaid · 19/09/2021 07:58

I'm at the end of my tether - she cries all the time .....

She's 10 weeks. Breastfed. Cries. All. The. Time
Doesn't sleep - naps for 15 mins if I'm lucky during the day and even then it's only if I hold her.

She Screams, goes red, goes stiff and won't settle unless I'm holding her then starts all over again after maybe 5 minutes

I thought it was colic at first - GP said so - but surely she wouldn't cry all the time; I mean all the time.
Ive called them twice and they keep saying it's colic and don't even see me/ her (covid so phone appointments still)

Infacol / gripe water doesn't work
Only thing that gives her sone relief is baby calpol - which just makes her sleep for max 1 hour - then it starts all over again

I don't go out now because what's the point? She screams.
In the car, she screams
Food shopping; she screams

I don't sleep because she doesn't sleep. The 3 hours I get at night is broken, I'm sitting up in bed holding her; then she'll fall asleep & I usually drop off holding her - I know I shouldn't but I can't not get any sleep

I don't know what to do
I can't carry on like this - it's making me wish I wasn't a mum

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

1potato · 22/09/2021 20:41

Oh sorry I missed your happy ending. So happy for you!

crosbyrose · 22/09/2021 20:49

This was my baby for 7 months. Cried all day every day and wouldn’t sleep longer than 20 mins. If breastfeeding cut out all dairy, if formula feeding contact your GP and ask to try a cows milk protein free formula. It can’t hurt to try. Hugs, it’s really really hard x

PerfectPrepPrincess · 22/09/2021 20:53

Cows milk protein allergy?

confettiballoons · 22/09/2021 20:58

So pleased for you OP, came across this thread just now and was thinking what I could suggest and good on you for insisting you get seen

ZoChan · 22/09/2021 21:04

Well done for insisting to be seen and do put in a complaint. If they don't know they've missed you, how will they improve for the next person who is suffering?

Hope you all get a bit more sleep tonight!!

peachgreen · 22/09/2021 21:16

Just echoing everyone else who said this sounds like a dairy allergy. Exactly how my daughter presented and it genuinely almost killed me. Strength and solidarity to you, OP - ask for and accept all the help you can get. I'm furious that your GP and HV have left you to suffer - although my GP did too - "babies cry" were his exact words, and it took another 2 months for him to finally accept that she wasn't just a fussy baby and was in fact in pain all the time. Took less than 2 weeks on the dairy-free milk for her to become a completely different child.

peachgreen · 22/09/2021 21:19

I've actually cried reading this thread because I remember how fucking hard it was and how completely helpless and hopeless I felt. Argh. I really hope she continues to improve. If not, push for more help

Gaviscon helped for a little bit with DD but what she really needed was omeprazole and a dairy-free milk.

Needanewadventure2021 · 22/09/2021 21:25

Same, this thread reminded me of how distressing it was to be around my niece. I remember my brother and SIL were literally at breaking point. They were all unbearable to be around because of her screaming all the time. We didn't have to live with it, just visiting them left me so upset.

I am so glad she seems more settled. I'm actually over the moon for you

Tbird5 · 22/09/2021 21:38

You have described my LO for the first 5 months of his life. The screaming, nappies, no sleep. Had no support either till i got fed up and took him to childrens a&e. He was diagnosed with acid reflux and dairy allergy. Hope you get it sorted and My heart goes out to you x

Original poster

WhoSaid · 22/09/2021 21:54

She's been asleep for about an hour so far; I've put her in her next to me crib and she didn't wake up!
I've managed to quickly sort out the house as I finally have 2 hands back

I am so happy
I've had a HOT tea and a cake to celebrate! Ha ... forgot what a hot cup of tea tasted like

Even just this little time with her and how her behaviour seems to have changed has actually made me like her - if that's even a thing? - I loved her before but now I actually like her

Fingers crossed she stays like this now but if not I have a back up with the other medication they gave me - and if she does get worse again I'll just bypass my GP and go back to the urgent care again because I don't have the faith in my GP to sort this

OP posts:

Dragonpox · 22/09/2021 21:55

Good update! Just please be aware that gaviscon will help the symptom of reflux but cmpa might be the underlying cause. I would suggest going dairy free because if it is an allergy then masking the symptoms won't be great long term.

SingingInTheShithouse · 22/09/2021 22:18

Fantastic update. I'm so pleased you both finally have an answer & help

LemonDrizzles · 23/09/2021 02:35

Have you tried eating porridge, avocado, walnuts type of food before breastfeeding to "bulk up" your breastmilk? It might be worth a try

Source:
www.medela.co.uk/breastfeeding/mums-journey/breastfeeding-what-to-eat

and there are other sources as well

EL1984 · 23/09/2021 08:31

Woooohoooo so glad you got the support you needed and hopefully you now have a happier baby!
How did you all sleep last night?

As others have mentioned there will be a reason behind the reflux, often they are uncomfortable with dairy so I would recommend trialling cutting dairy out of your diet for a few weeks. Sometimes reflux meds can have side effects like constipation so you don't want to be too reliant on them forever.

Original poster

WhoSaid · 23/09/2021 10:57

They did say she may be constipated and to give boiled water after a feed; but I have found it to be easier getting the gaviscon into her if it's mixed into a bottle so think I'm going to have to start expressing or move to formula as I'm fighting with her and a spoon otherwise

I have stopped dairy from yesterday so we'll see how she goes - but I don't think I can quit dairy forever so maybe I will move straight across to formula going forwards if it isn't working for me doing no dairy

We had an amazing sleep! She stayed in the next to me crib from when I put her down last night :-)
Up twice as normal for feeds; but she slept in until 9:45 which is unheard of and has been so happy this morning - no crying at all

OP posts:

GrandmasCat · 23/09/2021 15:23

Interesting that they mentioned about possible constipation, my dairy allergic baby was always constipated (and had a bloated tummy) until we removed dairy so, it may be the problem resolves itself now you are taking dairy out of your diet (it will take 2 or 3 weeks for you to see a difference after you remove a possible allergen so do not get disappointed if restricting your diet doesn’t make much difference in the first few days )

Starlightstarbright1 · 25/09/2021 20:29

So pleased to read your update.

See how you go.. just be aware formula can cause constipation in some babies..

Hopefully you have another good nights sleep tonight.. try and catch up on sleep not just the cleaning.

Knockoneofftheshelftowin · 25/09/2021 20:43

I have nothing to add but I am thinking of you. I am so glad your baby seems to be getting better, the poor thing must have been in such pain.
It must be so hard doing everything on your own, well done and good luck.

Original poster

WhoSaid · 26/09/2021 13:12

She has been an absolute dream this weekend ... I've managed to go out both days to different events with her & travel in the car without having to stop!

Bought some more MAM bottles and have also been expressing as well as using aptimal milk - she still isn't keen on the bottle if someone else tries to feed her - but it's easier to get the gaviscon into her so between me and my other Dd she's been getting the medicine. Also has some top ups from breastfeeding still but I think it's more for comfort rather than actually being hungry.

I can't believe how much she's changed over such a short space of time. Almost makes me upset that we both struggled for them first months not being listened too because we'll never get them back now

OP posts:

em831 · 27/09/2021 20:17

@WhoSaid
I am in exactly the same situation. I'm on my own with a baby the same as yours. She's nearly 5 months. It is so exhausting. I BF too so I've cut out all dairy as she has a suspected allergy. She has been on two different meds for reflux. I've tried the usual gripe water m/Infacol etc. I've excepted the fact that is is just what is called a 'high needs' baby. It really is soul destroying sometimes. I'm here if you want to chat some more x

1990b · 27/09/2021 20:51

Hi, OP

BIG HUG from me to you. This brought back memories of my daughter, she was a crier and l was so close to just giving up. I wasn't a single parent but husband worked long hours and zero family support.

Can l suggest that you try Dentinox for your little girl. Also if she is truly crying that much then please take her to A&E.

Its better to get her checked out even if they tell you everything is OK.

Also l would assess what your eating as this could potentially be causing the issues with poo.

My daughter is now almost 7 months, those first 12 weeks were the worst 12 weeks of of my life at that point. I shudder when l think back to what she was like

It does get better. You are doing a good job

Itsbeen84yearss · 27/09/2021 21:22

Oh these are lovely updates ❤️❤️

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