How can someone reject their own flesh and blood?

[Mum901]

I will never understand. Ever!
I made a post on here a few days ago detailing recent events that have happened (social services removing DD after I witnessed a suicide which triggered an unstable mental state)
Well yesterday the social worker rang and asked for DD father's contact details. (We broke up once I became pregnant because I refused to have an abortion, haven't seen him since and he's never met DD) I've tried several times in the past to contact him but he always blocks me and remains adamant that he wants nothing to do with either of us.
Yesterday the social worker asked for his contact details so that they can see if he'd be willing to offer any help and support with DD. I tried to call and I WhatsApped him from my new number, telling him that I need to speak with him urgently regarding DD and that the authorities will be contacting him and he just blocked me again..of course he did smh
While I accept that I can't force him to be a part of DD life, I just can't believe how he can live his life, knowing that he has a child and not give two s!! I consider myself to be an open minded person and I really try not to judge people but there are a few types of people in this world that I will never understand and one is people that reject their own innocent children. It's one of the most cold hearted selfish things you can do imo.

not wanting anything to do with her is a moot point.
he is her father, legally. therefore ss need to explore if they can place the child with their other legal parent. he is her legal next of kin.

op I hope you feel better soon and will be able to welcome dd back home.

Presumably he isn’t on the birth certificate, therefore hasn’t got any parental responsibility. So legally he’s nobody. Biologically he’s her father but not for any meaningful purpose in a legal sense.

I think SS are looking to see what kind of wider support network you will have, to assess giving your DD back. I'm a single mother, same circumstances as you, and I was asked about this by my midwife.
I reckon it's worth you contacting SS and being proactive. Saying you will be joining mother and child groups/playgroups to actively widen your support network.

She witnessed a suicide and had a menta breakdown. She contacted SS herself because shes a responsible and loving parent. How dare you victim blame her.

I was wrong!! DD has not been "removed" from my care but actually been placed into voluntary temporary foster care, which is a totally different thing!! Thank God!! I called up the Family Rights Group a few days ago and explained everything that's happened and they gave me clear clarification of what is actually happening and what my rights are, which was later confirmed by the social worker.

I'm so relieved!! I think that sometimes when things happen, we panic and think the worst and that's exactly what I did, but I'm so glad that I have a clearer understanding of what's going on now!
The fact that she's in Voluntary Foster care means that I could actually request for her to be discharged, however if SS don't feel that I have the right support in place etc they can then apply to the courts to keep her in care until they truly believe that I'm in a stable enough position to independently care for DD. I've been liaising with SS and I've asked them to provide me with a copy of all paper work so that I'm fully on board with everything that's going on. And going forward I'll be working with them to put the right support in place for me so that nothing like this ever happens again. So I'm definitely feeling much better and optimistic about things now!!!

Omg op I can’t say how happy I am for you!! What a relief! I’m so glad you called the family rights group as I’ve always found them so helpful in the past and a lot more transparent the social workers. I’m shocked the SW didn’t tell you it was voluntary! but also child in need plans are but they won’t tell you that either. I hope you get your daughter back very soon. and you was right for reaching out for support don’t let anyone ever tell you that was wrong, that’s what a good mother does.

Thanks so much @PumpkinP you've been so understanding and supportive on this thread!X

Social services do place children with fathers who have not been involved with their care up to that point, I know children that has happened to. The fathers don't always know about their children but, like all potential carers, have to be assessed by SS and are gradually introduced to their child.

That's in the case of a mother who is considered incapable of looking after the child ever again. Very different to the OP's situation where she needs temporary help due to ill health where the best thing for the child is to stay in short term foster care until she is well enough to care for her daughter again (conversely if her DDs father already did EOW or 50% or whatever then clearly the best thing for her DD would have been to live with her DDad who she already had a loving relationship with).

OP I hope you get better soon. The foster carers will look after your DD for you so you can concentrate on getting better. Are you well enough to have contact with her regularly?

Thanks @CountFosco and yep I get video calls with her every other day but had it not been for this bloody virus, I'd have been able to actually see and spend time with her a few times a week. But nevermind that because I'm feeling much better and things are definitely looking up, so she should be home soon!! And I'll be able to look back at this time as just a "blip". Hopefully, in future, if I witness anything as traumatic as I did, (God forbid I don't) it won't trigger me so dramatically as it did this time...xx