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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

So which would YOU choose?

68 replies

lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 15:22

Hi all. So, I'm recently single (well, back in january really but only just managed to get him out of our lives properly) and have 2 'potential dates'. I'm soooo out of practice and also so much older than I was last time I did the dating thing that priorities change. So thought I'd ask the advice of all you lovely people .
Man a) is 2 years younger than me, at 36. Tall, dark and handsome, sporty and says he 'adores women'. Has a fairly good job. Loves shopping, and buying underwear and shoes for women. He's separated, has 2 kids and sees them all the time.
Man b) is 7 years older than me, at 45. Is romantic, and loves buying little surprise gifts for his woman. Wants to spoil his lady. Seems very gentle and kind and has a VERY good job. VERY good. he's also handsome, but in a more mature kind of way, and looks a bit like Colin Firth (Mark Darcy in Bridget) He's also separated with kids.

So....in my younger days I would have gone for Mr Ice Hockey, and risked the heartache. But now I am older, and have the kids, I am veering towards the older, more mature and very kind Mr darcy. Who would you go for?

OP posts:
lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 16:13

Apparently Ice Man's friends think he's gay as he's not ashamed of indulging the female side of himself!

OP posts:
Pinkchampagne · 22/08/2007 16:50

It is very nerve wrecking to have to start all this dating business again, isn't it?!

snowwonder · 22/08/2007 18:06

i have got a thread on it now as we are now def meeting!!!!!

Tamz77 · 22/08/2007 18:18

Go out with both of them a few times and see which one you click with; you can't decide something like this on the basis of age/where their kids live/or even what they say about themselve (might be full of sh*t). I've recently been in a similar position and saw one of the guys on two occasions before I realised that I really didn't fancy him much and prob never would, even though he was really lovely to spend time with, so I ended it there. It's perfectly reasonable when you're only just getting to know each other in fact IMO most blokes prob do the same thing.

jellyjelly · 22/08/2007 18:32

i WOULD SAY GO OUT WITH BOTH OF THEM BUT I NOW GO FOR RELAILABILITY rather than one that adores woman as i see that as he will try it on with anything that moves.

Pinkchampagne · 22/08/2007 18:33

Do they both have your number?

madamez · 22/08/2007 18:37

Date 'em both and see. Tell them you're not ready for a monogamous relationship with anyone at the moment, and have some fun.
As long as you're honest, there's no need to rush into an exclusive relationship with either man - or to ever have a monogamous relationship again, unless you particularly want one.

lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 18:42

Hi, only Ice Man has my number. But still no call or text from him. Hmm...doesn't bode well.

OP posts:
Pinkchampagne · 22/08/2007 18:44

Hmmm, unreliable sort. I say go for the other one then!

lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 18:46

Yep. he tells me he's always late too, always. I HATE that in anyone, let alone a date.
And yet...he is gorgeous.

OP posts:
nutcracker · 22/08/2007 18:46

I'd go for b).

Oh to be in a position to choose in the first place LOL.

LittleBella · 22/08/2007 18:49

Do both of them.

lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 18:50

LOL nutcracker. They're hardly pursuing me...Man a} hasn't even called when he said he would! And man b) is still very tentative. But I seem to be giving off some 'I'm free to date' vibes, lol. Or am I just shamelessly ogling men now that I can????

OP posts:
snowwonder · 22/08/2007 18:51

i think like other say go out with both if possible to see what pans out, and see how you connect..

lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 18:51

Do them Bella????? LOL, do you mean do them?

OP posts:
LittleBella · 22/08/2007 18:53

Do I mean connect with them both?

lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 18:54

But does one not feel like a harlot by going out with lots of different men?

OP posts:
lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 18:54

Connect? ROFL...

OP posts:
snowwonder · 22/08/2007 18:56

ha ha

no you are just meeting friends? you are not committed to any of them.... so no harm in meeting each one of them for drink/dinner, and seeing how it goes..

me23 · 22/08/2007 19:14

I'd go for b also, that's if I was looking for it to develop into something. If I just wanted to get back into the swing of things and have a 'fling' i.e practise sex to get back up to speed I'd go for mr A. I also deprise lateness and the fact he still hasn't tex would rile me, so I wouldn't be expecting much from him!

me23 · 22/08/2007 19:15

obviously that should be despise and text

madamez · 22/08/2007 20:19

LBT - you only need to feel like a harlot if you're chargin them for your company. Which might be a way to boost the household income of course but is not without its pitfalls.

babyblue2 · 22/08/2007 20:27

I'd choose the more mature Mr Darcy and then if it he's not what you're looking for or you aren't sure go out with Mr Ice Hockey for a bit of a comparison.

lifebeginstoday · 22/08/2007 20:58

Still no text or call. Flighty so and so! lol. At least I'll be able to empathise with my daughter through the whole dating thing! lol

OP posts:
Pinkchampagne · 22/08/2007 21:16

I'd forget about Mr unreliable & go for Mr mature if I were you!

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