Tommorow I am gonna say Hi to my new life

[nutcracker]

Old life has gone, in the bin, no more, finnished.

New life = me and the kids on our own, muddling through it until we get it right and laughing along the way.

I am not going to let xp control me anymore, how i feel, how i think and when i cry.

If he ses the kids he sees them, if he doesn't fine, his loss, I'll be there to help them through it.

Never in a million years did I ever think that I could end my relationship with him, but i did it, so what is the point in letting him carry on making me miserable, that way he is still here.

My life may have many problems right now, but only I can sort them out, only I can say 'no, f**k off, no more'.

I will sort myself out if it kills me, and I will make sure that I and my kids have happy life, whatever happens.

PS - I haven't had a drink either LOL

sorry nutty, missed yr message.

That sounds a bit more positive and hopeful. Maybe you could sort something out that he could do on a regular basis like take them to the library for an hour on a Saturday morning? Just to give them a bit of time with him...and you a break?

Wekk he had the girls yesterday, and then we spoke about what we are going to do when they return to school, but at the mo he isn't sure, as he said he is waiting to hear about 2 jobs.

I think he will probably have them on a Sat, but possibly not every Sat. I wanted him to collect them from school once a week too, but that will depend on wether he gets one of these jobs.

He apologised for the past few weeks, and said he thinks he has made a fool of himself with this woman and that he won't contact her again. I said that this was entirly up to him and that I didn't care wether he saw her again or not, but that if he did he had to think about the kids before her.

Ih nut, looks like itmight become a bitmore positive for your children then?

What a weird situation, so he isn't seeing this woman as in a partner type thing? She is maybe enjoing the attention?

Gosh seems like things have shifted inthe past few days. Somtimes youhave to get really donw and then shake yourself up, and more positive things happen.

I hope he gets one of these jobs, and starts to behave himself better.

well done nutty it's a great attitude to take, and don't you feel a weight lifted now you have made that choice?

i know i did

He reckons that nothing sexual has happened with this woman at all, but that he was hoping they would eventually have a relationship.

He forgets that I know her better than he does and I honestly don't think she ever would of had a relationship with him. She is currently having an affair with a married bloke anyway.

Their relationship or non relationship isn't my concern anyway, I was only ever bothered because if the kids.

I'm not sure wether I believe him when he says he isn't going to contact her again, because whehn he gets bored i think he will.

Whatever happens, she is no longer my friend which I am not bothered about tbh as I was already trying to distance myself from her.

So long as he now keeps his promises wrt the kids, then thats all fine with me.

I do Lou yeah, because tbh it was making me feel really ill, I couldn't eat, sleep or get through a day without crying, and he certainly isn't worth any of that.

i think we have to get really low before we can see what these guys do, and do something about it

i was the same with exh

i suddenly saw v clearly what he was doing to the kids and myself, and i just knew it had to stop

anything else i can cope with now, crappy as it may be sometimes

Yeah thats how I feel now tbh, like I have hit rock bottom so the only way is up, whatever hapens.

yes , but you are still standing so onwards and upwards

Nutcracker that sounds much more positive.

really really hope you can work something good out for the kids.

Oh Nutcracker I am right there with you!

I know exactly how you feel at the moment. I have been married to a control freak for 9 years and since he walked out on us 1 month ago I have been so busy sorting everthing out I didn't notice one thing.

I have my freedom back.

We can do it Nutcracker! We can do it not only for our children but for ourselves!

(Mine is trying mind games at the moment saying that women are asking him out. Good luck to them he is a crafty liar who left us in a lot of debt! It is driving him mad that I really don't give a toss anymore. I shed my last tear for him and our farce of a marriage weeks ago!

well done nutcracker, you sound a lot better.

i wish i could think badly of my ex dh, but tbh i wish i had never asked him to leave - before i got depressed and treated him like crap we were very happy together ,but now he is in his new relationship. i am just kicking myself.
i wish he was some bastard that i could hate. but he isnt.