Do you ever worry that you will be alone for the rest fo your life ??

[NuttyMuffins]

I do, seems to be a huge possibilty for me.

NuttyMuffins - everyone? I'm not

If i wanted to meet someone to share my life with at the moment, and i thought that Everyone else was, then i think i would feel sad and lonely. I think its how you see it?

I was single for 2 years before I met my current DP, ex fled for the hills when I found out I was pregnant.
I was really happy and contented on my own, I wasn't inkling after a relationship and had 'roger' for the other things!

I met my DP in the strangest of places and to be honest im not any more or less happier, just a different kind, and of course rogers batteries last far longer now.

I guess what im saying is that its important to be happy and content in your own life first before you embark on a relationship.
Then you won't be afraid to tell any loser to bog off!

Work on your current circumstances first and then sit back and see what happens.

good advice hoola

I sometimes feel lonely, and worry that I will never feel loved agn, or have someone to love.

Yet, my main worry is that where i live has no decent available men in it, right out in the stix!

Yet, even tho I do like someone atm, i am afraid that I could never trust someone again, or i'd be rushing in, expecting true love and commitment, to sort of make it worth it-if that makes any sense!! i just dont know how I'd get into a relationship again, there are many more things to consider, like my dd for a start, I would want someone who understood how important she is.

How do you strat seeing someone agian, without that fear of it being a waste of time, guess i'm still very scarred from my mariage ending.

I'm so pleased it's not just me that feels lonely.

My friends don't want to go out in the evenings (they're all married) so I end up sitting at home alone.

I'm not ready for dating just yet. I just want to go out and socialise, have fun and learn to live again but there doesn't seem to be anyone else out there that wants to do the same.

I have a son with Sn. no social life at all...the only adults i speak to are either DS's teachers who are al female or my parents.

i have no friends that i am in touch with and look like a bag lady most of the time.

i dont worry i will be single forever....I KNOW i will be single forever.

Catnids, I have just started going to a beginners line dancing (don't laugh) class once a week, its all women but its a great way to make new friends, could you do something like that, plenty of people go on their own.

Hiya Hoolagirl

Thanks for the idea but I can't do stuff like that -got a bad back- so anything like dancing, aerobics, salsa, etc is off my list.

Like NuttyMuffins I hate being on my own. I used to quite like my own company but now that I haven't got a choice I'm not liking it at all!!

The kids are going out with their dad for a couple of hours soon and I'm desperately trying to think of something to do that gets me out of the house. Usually I end up walking the dog or wandering round the shops which is fine but sometimes I long for a bit of company and a laugh.

I've always been the strong supportive one in my friendships and now that I need the help and support my friends can't cope. I even texted them all yesterday to ask if they have any friends of friends who fancy a bit of company, a chat, whatever in the evenings. There has to be someone out there who fancies a night out!

The thought of spending every evening alone, never going out having fun, for the rest of my days depresses me to the core.

Hmmm, how old are your kids, too old to join a mother and toddler group?
If they're old enough could you take them ice skating or bowling, or make them join a club that you need to go to, you could get chatting to people that way.
Go on and exploit the kids
What about their friends mums, could you invite them to tea?

Do you have a DS, start taking him to football training, loadsa guys!

Hiya

My kids are 11 (boy), 9 (boy - 10 on thursday) and 7 (girl). So a bit old for toddler groups!

Eldest does the footy thing but his dad takes him to that and all the fella's there are married anyway!

I know all my kids friends mums and they're all married too and not up for a night out whatever it might be.

I'm seriously considering going to a Matchingmums event in my area. Never been to one before and I'm ridiculously shy so it's going to be anxiety ridden for me. It's in 2 weeks so I'll see how I feel then, fingers crossed I don't bottle out!!!

Thanks for thinking of me and coming up with some fab ideas.

Lots of these posts ring bells with me, especially snaf's. I am pretty happy and content on my own, friends and family around, university and my daughter to keep me busy.

Sometimes I like the idea of falling love, etc etc and other times the idea horrifies me, I am very independent, love my quiet 'alone' time, my space and would hate to have to compromise!!

So yes, sometimes I think I'll be alone forever, but I am only twenty-five so I guess I have a fair chance of another relationship or two before I die! (But don't like the idea of marriage or living together)

not really

i've had a few flings and a 9m relationship since i split with exh in nov 05

the 9m one just ended , and i'm more than unhappy about it, but if i am alone i'm not that fussed

and the fact i have 4 kids and still had someone wanting to be part of my life for 9m before he moved away, shows not all blokes are bothered about getting involved with women who have kids

Hi, I have two ds aged 8mths and 3 yrs. My dh left when ds2 was 6 weeks old. I am now sick of being alone every evening and always having to cope. It is nice to know I am not the only one in this situation. Same as others, really how many eligable men do you meet in Tesco, toddlers or playschool run, and if they were there would they look twice and an over weight (when do you have time to loose it) mum with two littlens?

i guess you just have to start going out at night, organise a babysitter and also you'll have something to look forward to. Try and go out regularly with your friends, say twice a month?
When i split from my ex dp it only took a few weeks until i met dh, on a night out, and the rest is history.
(Luckily i dont have to worry about my weight as i find running everywhere after my dcs keep me healthy and a nice size 8!)

what is matchingmums?????

dating or to met friends?

Hiya

It's a website for mums to meet other mums and they have events where mums can meet up rather than be online. I've only just joined and have never been to any of the events so I'm not sure how it all works.

And as for dating....I wish!!!

Cat

that sounds good, the bigger your social circle the more likely you are to knwo someone who may be able to pair you up with someone

i just smiled at a guy who i have had the hots for for 15 months!!!!!! i see him every wednesday

It's gotta be better than sitting in miserable on another lonely friday night. Gotta get through this friday first though.

Weeks ago my friend arranged for us to go out this friday but I haven't heard from her despite texting her a few times this week to confirm. She has a habit of arranging things and then backing out at the last minute. Why do people do that?? Especially when she knows how crap my life is at the moment. I'll wait and see what happens on friday, not holding my breath though.

I'd like a boyfriend eventually but I'm at the very beginning of a divorce so I'm probably not in the best state of mind to be seeing anyone just yet!! Having said that my husband is happily spending every spare minute with his new girlfriend .

yeah it can be miserable at times,
when i was newly single i did a great course through relate called 'new life new challenge', it is aimed at people who have just broken up i fiund it very helpful in coming to terms with my split which i really didnt want, i also went to counselling on my own which was really good to.

what part of country are you in?

did he smile back?

I'm in Cheshire. I've got some counselling lined up too, hopefully it'll help me get through this difficult part of my life.

I didn't want the split but I couldn't live with his secrets and lies anymore so our marriage had to end. We had Relate counselling but it was clear that our marriage was finished.

It's almost a year since I ended it with him and 6 months since he moved out. Next month we'll be married 15 years. I'm happy alone here just me and the kids but when the kids aren't here I really struggle with the emptyness.

Gotta get myself a new life!!!

i am sure it will really help you loads it did for me, best of luck with it.....

Lou33- YES he did smile back well we kind of smiled together (if that makes sense) i normally avoid eye contct with him but today i didnt and it was like fireworks, i got into car and my face was burning red (attractive!!!!) but i need to try and use this to maybe move things foward
how i do that i dont know, becasue the dating game is one big blur to me

With me being single and not even getting any slight interest from anyone male since I split is just making my self esteem even lower, to the point where I wouldn't believe someone if they did say they liked/fancied me.

I know there are blokes out there who would be willing to date someone with kids, but right now I just can't really ever see it happening, have already had one bloke say 'well tbh the kids are whats are stopping me'......made me feel so damn broken and undatable.

I feel the same as you. Self-confidence and self-esteem through the floor at the moment. Who would look twice at me?? And if they did would they want to take on 3 kids and a dog? Probably not.

SW: Well done for making eye contact AND smiling at the man!! I can barely look people in the face let alone make eye contact and smiling! I hope he asks you out