CSA for step child

[helmaria]

Now my ex has a step child living with him, does this lessen my csa payments?

Frog.

Why are you ignoring it when you are being told that a RP is held accountable

sock purely as it was the old system and the mom was on IS and I wasnt. It remained that way for 8 years. She didnt actually get the money herself I dont think, I believe it was paid to benefits.

Meep I agree with some of what you are saying but I find your view very simplistic of the process. My point in this is that court is expensive when sanctions are not imposed on a RP who repeatedly obstructs contact for no reason other than they can and there are those that do.

I am not suggesting every RP is like that, the same as not every NRP wants to pay as little as possible.

The systems are clearly all flawed or this would not be such an emotive subject.

This started as a question around step children having an impact on cm and then turned into a bashing of NRP that choose to go on to support other families. Some do at the expense of their first families but not all.

What if NRP and new partner knew they could afford 1 more dc and still fully support first family but then found out they were having twins and had to cut back?

Like others I have been on both sides and see the only fair solution to be one where both parents have automatic right to 50:50 and automatic financial responsibility.

I don't care. Anyone who wants to can trail through my bank statements. I have nothing to hide. It is doubtful it will ever happen, the man power it would take to keep on top of is money the Government doesn't have.

It is also an over-compensation since we already have systems in place to determine whether a child is being looked after adequately. Obviously there are times where people fall through the cracks but that happens and will continue to happen in every system.

Like I said, no one actually needs to look at my bank statement to see my daughter is sufficiently provided for.

People are allowed to think that a NRP who does not support their child and chooses to support a step child instead is a bit of a shit.

meep I'm not talking about DCs being looked after adequately, I'm talking about accounting for the CM monies provided by the NRP that the RP is responsible for spending to the benefit of the DCs.

Or, should a NRP merely be grateful that the DCs are not coming to the attention of SS?

sock I dont belive that is what I said? I was referring to the actual start of tbe thread.

sock can NRP support both? Or, if there is money for a DSC, should that actually be redirected to biological DCs instead?

Meep Meep you get much more handbag for your money in TKMaxx. Extra wine money.

Of course they can support both but they shouldn't do so to the detriment of one and one alone.

Accounting for what maintenance is spent on ? [shock\ I text my Ex with regular updates on how many toilet rolls I've bought and send him copies of my bank statements. ( I tippex out the Gin club Direct debit)

Except I don't because he doesn't pay maintenance cos he's too busy paying for someone elses kids.

Thread has gone full circle.

Bashing of NRP that choose to go on to support other families. Some do at the expense of their first families but not all.

You are wrong there actually. I think it is great if a NRP goes on to support a step family or extend their own family. IF they can afford it. I don't think anyone on this thread has said any different actually. I have "bashed" (criticized is more accurate) NRPs and RPs selfish choices when quite simply they can't afford to do it. If someone doesn't like that then personally I question their own morals more than I do my own. I have also maintained throughout about the differences between facing unintentional financial hardship and deliberately making the choice without a second though to existing children.

Frog The RP provides all of the things that I have told you twice about now. If the NRP money happens to be going on heating or toward some of your rent then it is still going towards the child. It doesn't have to be on clothes or shoes or something physical the child can hold. This is why the law has it that it is to be spent at the RP discretion. If an NRP doesn't like that. Tough shit quite frankly.

And if NRPs miss a payment or request a reduction can the RP go through their accounts too to check they aren't wasting money that could go to the DCs Frogs?

Oh Monet thanks for the tip I can go designer this week though since I got a box of wine on special off with my shopping. Yes a box. In fact I may just crack that bad boy open right now.

I actually tried to stay away from this thread this afternoon but since it's back in full swing it would be rude to leave.

cheers.

basgetti I thought you meant pet frogs for a split second. Got a bit about what thread I was on.

Haha! I missed a comma there

'Admits to giggling a bit ar Basgettis reference to DCs Frogs'

My kids can't afford frogs. And I have no lemon for my gin

You can afford shopping Meep? I hope it's only food for the kids though ?

I'm glad you have no lemon. It's clearly lime you need.

Gin and LIME? Noooooooo.

I have some very posh olives though. I'm sharing them with my poor frogless DCs.

My toddler likes to put olives in his mouth and then fire them at you across the room

Lime always lime. If you want to be really posh cucumber, it soaks in a bit a gin too so it makes for a nice (healthy?) snack at the end of your glass. Win win.

Sock You made me spit my wine out laughing what a waste!

I can imagine it's not particularly funny for you however, for me it provides a lot of amusement.

Well Monet maybe if you stopped wasting your non existent CM on gin you could afford to by your DCs an amphibian or two. How selfish can you get.

basgetti

Who would actually want pet frogs jumping about their house? They would probably get smothered in garlic and cooked in this house when my Dad came for a visit.

"Sorry sweetheart, you're Granda ate your pet frog..."

You can afford to feed a toddler olives ? And he doesn't even get any nutritional value from them. Does your poor Ex know ?