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Original poster

First appointment with CAFCASS officer, wot can i expect?

48 replies

7up · 02/03/2006 13:33

all she said was it takes about an hour, just wondered if there was any paperwork or anything i should take so im more prepared and what it involves really. my ex is seeing her 2 hours before me. have to go out now but would appreciate any replies. thankyou very much

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Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 16:44

,

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Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 19:20

bumpity bump please!

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mistressmiggins · 02/03/2006 20:17

bump = dont know Smile

Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 20:21

ta for bumping mistressmiggins

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Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 20:51

nobody loves meSad

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alliebaba · 02/03/2006 20:52

i do mmwwahhh x

charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 20:53

Hi 7up, we have recently been in meetings with Cafcass about ex wanting contact. Is this the same thing as you?

Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 20:55

yes!same thing!got court at end of april and they want to do a report about everything i think,not quite sure

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Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 20:59

charlie where you gone!!

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charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:05

sorry, still here. went for a fag! Grin I went to the cafcass offices first of all to have a meeting with our cafcass officer. I had written everything down that i could think of before i went and she found this very helpful.
and I did cos its so difficult to think of everything the bastards have done there and then and I knew I would kick myself if i forgot to say something important

charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:05

Have you been to court already, is this why cafcass are coming out to you?

Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 21:06

so have i got to go prepared to go back over 2 years when i was pregnant and he made me and my 8yr old homeless or just more recent stuff?

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charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:08

I started right from when my ds was born and he is now 8. It gives them an idea of relationship breakdown etc.

Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 21:08

been to court last december, he had access for 7wks then got all v.abusive infront of little ds so i stopped him coming to my home and said he'd have to go to contact centre, now back in court about contact centre and got cafcass in 2weeks before court. ds 16months old

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charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:08

sorry he is now 9. Gosh what a dreadful mother to forget ds's age.

charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:11

I refused access. Cafcass were then brought in to speak to me. I met her in their offices first to discuss what had happened over the 9 years.

She then came out to my house to speak to ds, who spoke to her on his own and then we went back to court and it was agreed by everybody that he would have indirect contact. He has now been sending letters every 3 weeks since then and they are very niceletters but ds doesn't want to see him.
Must be soooo difficult when your ds is solittle and cant have his say. Sad

Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 21:13

Grin ive got to do the statment for the court which my solicitor says is only from last dec when access broke down (it had only started in October). so basically the cafcass officer will take into account everything that happenend prior to this date?blimey, id better start making loads notes then, so much to tell!

do you have more than one meeting before the file is handed to the judge do you know?sorry loadsa questions!

im just going for a ciggy in the garden too!

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alliebaba · 02/03/2006 21:15

glad you've got some help babe x thanks charlie!

charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:17

Oh, I remember them saying something about a statement for the court, but we weren't asked to do this. I wonder if that is because my ds can be asked what he wants.
When my cafcass oficer wrote her report she included everything I had said going right back to the beginning so I think it might be worth while sitting down and writing it all down. Bullet point it so as you don't forget anything.
I just had the one meeting with cafcass on my own, then one with my ds then she wrote the report for the court.

charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:18

Have you got a solicitor? Does your ex pay maintenance?

Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 21:20

so if the first visit is 3weeks before the court do you think the report will be done, doesnt seem long enough to me. ive been told he will get access so ive resigned myself to the fact i'l be shoving my elder son somewhere Sadevery other week for a sat morn. i presume if the report isnt done then access cant be granted at the court, thats wot im hoping anyway!

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Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 21:22

yea got a solicitor, had a brill one and this one is not so hot. he did pay £300 a month maintenance and then in december reduced it to £100 and took his name off our rented property as guarantor!no concern for his son having a roof over his head eh!

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charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:23

sorry,i'm confused is your ex trying to see your 8 year old or 16month old or both?

charliegirl25 · 02/03/2006 21:26

My x hadnt ever paid any childmaintenance even though the csa had tried tracking himdown many a time. He started paying a year before he took me to court. And has now stopped again.

Original poster
7up · 02/03/2006 21:28

sorry charlie, i have an 11year old who was 8 when i met ex and isnt his son. 16month old is his son. i think id better start jotting stuff down when it comes to me during the day and going through notes ive kept in a carrier bag

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