i've posted numerous times before about EXp and how he constantly lets the dcs (and me tbh) down wrt not turning up for contact or turning up late or dropping them back late or giving vague times for when he will be here etc.
so yesterday evening he asked what the dcs were doing today. i told him we were going to the cinema and it would be over by 2pm so he said he would ring me at 2.15 to arrange collecting them. we got out of the cinema at 1.30 so went for lunch and got back home at 2.20pm. there was a text on my phone simply asking if we were home yet so i replied straight away saying yes we are at home now. (exp lives less than 10 minutes drive away) it got to 2.55pm and no reply or sign of him so i texted asking what time he would be here for the dcs. not that's it's relevant to him but my friend is coming over this evening and i was planning on having the 'dcs free' time to get the house cleaned as it really needs it before friend can come over. he didn't reply.
i texted again asking the same thing at 3.15pm he didn't reply so i phoned and he didn't answer but 2 minutes after i phoned he sent a text asking if dcs could stay over at his house. this is the first time and he has been making excuses as to why it couldn't happen so of course i said yes and again asked what time he would be in for the dcs. we packed their bags and dcs got all excited. exp didnt reply to the message even though i sent it straight after he had texted me so he was waiting on an answer and would have checked his phone.
by 3.45pm i was really annoyed that yet again i was sitting waiting for him to arrive before i could get on and do my stuff. it is always the same always me hanging about the house never knowing what time he will turn up and in teh past MNers have suggested i just not be in the house for the day so that he is kept waiting so at 3.45 i got the dcs into the car and we went to a local harbour to watch the boats. at 4pm he sent a message saying "i dont suppose you could leave the kids out?" well i ignored it. i know how childish that is but i never ignore his texts wrt to teh dcs i always respond and i make it so the dcs can go everytime he asks even if it has meant in the past cancelling arrangements we have made but this time i thought why the hell should i? he ignores me except when it suits him to respond. about 20 minutes later he rang and i ignored it.
he then sent another message saying he had no car available. it's a glorious day here, he lives directly on the bus route to where we live and he could get a taxi, or he could walk the 1 minute walk to his mum's and borrow hers which he usually does or he could ask a friend. what he meant is that there was no car directly outside his front door that he could access without any effort. well i ignored that message too. he sent another message about 20 minutes ago saying "why exactly is it you are doing this?" i haven't replied yet. i dont know what to reply. i'm still so furious. i can't get on with cleaning teh house while 2 year old is still here. i'm so sick of being so bloody available for him to just saunter in when he feels like being a dad. no -one transports my dcs to me, i go and get them.
i was tempted to reply "have a think about why i am doing this" but that's just silly isn't it?
what so i do to get my point across to him that he cant do this anymore? i cant cope with it. it isn't fair on me. and i know thsi is about the dcs but i am entitled to be able to make plans and expect to be able to keep them. so many times i have had to let my freinds down at the last minute because he hasn't turned up and it isn't fair he gets to arrange his children around whatever else he wants to do and i get to (hopefully) arrange what i wnat to do arround my children, which is how it should be when you are a parent. he picks them up like a magazine when he has nothing else to do.
i'm just so pissed off.