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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

Shall I contact the CSA?

47 replies

HappyMumof2 · 12/01/2006 14:34

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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horseshoe · 16/01/2006 19:10

Hi...She sounds very selfish and your ex obviously hasn't got the balls to stand up to her........

In our case, the mother of his child sent him a sort of "love" letter which is how I found out about the baby. It had a telephone number and I called her to tell her we were together and she hit the roof. SHe explained it was a one night stand although they knew of each other and she originally wasn't interested in having contact with him until after the bubs was born and she realised her baby needed a father and so sent the letter. She said that as he was with someone she wasn't interested in getting mixed up in all that and would take him for every penny she could. And that was that!!! We are not entitled to her address even though he has parental rights he would have to go to court to enforce it and he has admitted he doesn't want to.

Re the contact....maintenance has no bearing on contact. He could decline he is the father when he gets contacted by the CSA but they will pursue him unless he asks and pays for the test himself. If he wants to pursue contact and you refuse he will have to go through the courts. Chances are he will get better access but by the sounds of it can you really imagine his GF letting him do that?

lrkids · 26/01/2006 23:02

Happymum I have just skimmed this thread and noticed you said about backdating the money, I don't know whether you know but the CSA will not backdate it, the absent parent only has to pay from the date which the CSA gets in contact with them.
Also - my opinion, go for the money he is legally responsible for your dd even if only financially and also when you do get off benefits you will get to keep all of it.
I was in the same situaton as you a few months back, i.e. father was awarded contact so I asked for money. I also felt I was being petty but tbh I have struggled to work and look after my child for 5 yrs and don't see why he shouldn't pay something.

7777777 · 30/01/2006 21:39

i havnt read all this thread but i contacted CSA 4wks ago off my own back then when i applied for IS as a top up to my wage (as he'd reduced maintanance)i had to fill in all the forms again.

CSA phoned tonight and hadnt received the form off IS so i had to go through it all again. they then told me that as i got IS i wouldnt get much in the way of payments, i explained that the only reason i now got £12.42 a week IS was becoz he had lowered the maintenance and that if they got money off him i could get off benefits!!

they also they were gona ring him tonight and the claim would go from tonight providing they spoke to him. bloody ridiculous if you ask me.

i wouldnt care if i only got £5 or £10 a week of it as long as the twat had to pay up over £300 to someone. sorry for the rant it really pisses me off

Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 02/02/2006 19:36

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Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 10/02/2006 12:42

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ProfessorG · 10/02/2006 13:46

You are doing what the law in this country provides, you are not doing anything wrong and he has a duty to support his child. Now fill in that form!

Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 10/02/2006 14:23

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ProfessorG · 11/02/2006 18:25

Have you finished it yet?

Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 12/02/2006 09:34

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rickman · 12/02/2006 10:39

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Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 12/02/2006 10:58

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expatinscotland · 12/02/2006 11:49

forget the CSA, I'd shop him for benefit fraud instead.

Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 12/02/2006 16:24

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expatinscotland · 12/02/2006 16:27

benefit fraud costs us ALL hugely - it costs taxpayers, and it costs those who honestly need their benefit b/c there's less to go around.

two of the most common types of fraud: claiming as a lone parent when you're living w/a partner; working for cash in hand when you say you're not.

Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 12/02/2006 16:46

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expatinscotland · 12/02/2006 16:48

I'd be willing to bet money his new partner is claiming as a lone parent.

Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 12/02/2006 17:13

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expatinscotland · 12/02/2006 17:17

they are both complicit in the fraud and should at least have it stopped and pay it back.

that's stealing from the public and from others who are honestly claiming.

Original poster

HappyMumof2 · 12/02/2006 17:24

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flutterbee · 12/02/2006 17:25

Hi hm just to let you know that because you are on benefits once they request that you fill the form in you are legally obliged to do so, if you fail to return it they are able to reduce your benefits until you co-operate.

rickman · 12/02/2006 20:07

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HappyMumof2 · 13/02/2006 19:04

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