Fat Neighbour versus Single Dad

[AitchGee]

I have the misfortune to be within 100 yards of what I can only describe as a disgustingly obese childless woman aged about 40. She is registered as disabled.

My two small sons have played on the pavement with other children, in my opinion, quite normally. However, today this fatso knocked on my door and told me that she will be calling the police if they continue. She obviously has a few mental issues to boot!!

I was seething inside, mainly because she tried to play the disabled card on me, but luckily I refrained from comment. . I was tempted to tell her to sod off but at the last moment, I bit my lip. I now regret my calmness.

I am a single dad, mother buggered off 4 years ago, boys see her perhaps once or twice a year. Boys ages are 6 and 7.

I am fighting Small Cell Lung Cancer, undergoing Chemo/Radio Therapies and absolutely detest people that self-inflict disabilities.

Anyone got any ideas as to what I should say to the police when they do her beckoning and knock on my front door?

Well aren't you just adorable. It's difficult to see why you are still single.

If she does call the police and the children aren't doing anything wrong then they won't do anything.
She may well have mental health issues, if this is the case then the police and council are probably aware of her, it would be likely that she complains to them about various things.
Did she say specifically what she was complaining about?

So - basically, you are taking offence to a neighbour complaining about your kids....because she's fat.

You don't like fat people. We get it.

What a pointless OP.

NEXT!

AitchGee: The next time you are standing in the kitchen and the floor starts to shake, the windows rattle you will know instinctively that the baby elephant is coming. Compose yourself. Grab camcorder and open front door. Smile, say nothing and give her time to wipe the sweat off her brow and get her breath back. Let her have her rant and when she stops to gasp for more air remind her that a walking advertisement for the local fish shop does not cut it for you. All her attempts to engage in an adult relationship are doom to fail. Let her know [gently] that you are grateful that she chose you as the sperm provider for her first child but fat people really don?t do it for you.

Now at this point out of desperation because she knows she is losing you she will attempt to physically grab hold of you but I normally find with fatso?s a quick kick to the knee is enough to put them on the ground. Start camcorder and video it as it is fucking hilarious watching fatso?s trying to get up off the ground. Go inside and make a cup of tea and realise that was the day you started to grow a pair. Then every time you are feeling down and low you can watch it and have a good laugh.

To everyone else on here with your bitchy comments?..go and get a life. The man put up a posting not because he is really looking for advice but probably just looking to engage with the outside world on an adult level. He has two young boys, an ex who bugger off that hardly sees them and a medical condition that would leave the strongest of us feeling low and depressed at times. Moreover when the kids are in bed and he is thinking of his condition and sees people who self-inflict though poor diet/alcohol/drugs he has probably asked ?why me?? To that end his anger is not only justified but normal given the circumstances. Cut him some slack and stop being so harsh.

@itslife

"To everyone else on here with your bitchy comments?..go and get a life. The man put up a posting not because he is really looking for advice but probably just looking to engage with the outside world on an adult level. He has two young boys, an ex who bugger off that hardly sees them and a medical condition that would leave the strongest of us feeling low and depressed at times. Moreover when the kids are in bed and he is thinking of his condition and sees people who self-inflict though poor diet/alcohol/drugs he has probably asked ?why me?? To that end his anger is not only justified but normal given the circumstances. Cut him some slack and stop being so harsh."

Not a problem,itslife.

I get the feeling from some of the personal and insulting comments that Mumsnet rules of posting are commonly disregarded. Interesting though.

I am not in the business of being liked or disliked here, frankly, I don't give a damn.

I must admit, I had a feeling that some would baulk at my anti-self-harming, societal leeching, pseudo disabled people as within all communities there will be a percentage of fat druggies or fat alkies standing their common ground. Not to forget a few of the misguided so-called "do-gooders"

Well, you're quite foul.

Your opinion of what is 'quite normal' is to abuse the obese, so I wouldn't be surprised if that's what your children were doing.

I'm sorry you're ill, but that isn't an excuse to talk so disparagingly of others.

Beam me up Scottie.

AitchGee, you missed a trick mate.

This would have been stunning in AIBU.

HTH.

Where did the fucking sock puppet come from? This thread is hideous.

"Well, you're quite foul.

Your opinion of what is 'quite normal' is to abuse the obese, so I wouldn't be surprised if that's what your children were doing.....snip"

The children are very well behaved and not able to stand their ground with this particular entity, but you've given me some ideas to mull over.

As far as I'm concerned, anyone that tries to "win" an argument by using "disability" as a weapon, especially when that disability is self-inflicted, deserves all they get.

This trait is not specifically a fatso problem, but shares commonality with drug addicts, alcoholics et al. These people bleat on about how circumstances forced them onto the slippery slope, but rarely ever admit their culpability. Of course there are the odd ones that do, but hardly enough to form a ripple in the ocean.

Well it's annoying when people don't take responsibility for their self-destructive behaviours, and when they lie to themselves, and when they just don't see what they are doing to contribute to their problems, and when they try to get your sympathy when their problems are within their control but they just don't choose to do anything about them.

But what I don't understand is why it matters so much to you.

And 'culpability'?? Perfectly happy person decides to eat and eat and eat until she becomes obese and then complains about it. Is that how you think it happens? Perfectly happy person suddenly starts injecting heroin for no reason at all and then whinges to you about it?

Don't you wonder why perfectly happy people seem to sabotage their lives in this way? Are they really doing it just to annoy you?

Is your ex wife overweight, AitchGee? Did you send her off to Fattyville?

AitchGee

If it hasn't been suggested yet maybe you should make the odd video of your kids playing harmlessly outside.

Unless they are causing criminal damage I can't see the police really taking much notice of her.

I can see your annoyance at people like this playing the disability card.

I would have never got into this situation, because there would be no way on this earth that I would have left 2 children aged 6 and 7 unsupervised by an adult in the street to play !

hmm ! I sense a few issues here with overweight people but on the other hand there must be somewhere else for your kids to play other than outside of her house. Ive had neighbours like this in the past and at one point my little boy wouldnt go outside at all as she used to appear in the doorway of her house with her man beard and floral smock . Its very annoying but as an adult with children you need to show your kids that it takes all sort to make this world and by being nice to her you have the upper hand.

@cutebooots

get me onto the subjects of drug taking, prostitution, alcoholism, politicians and Palestinians and my "issues" about fat self-harming individuals would reduce. But as this thread, started by me, was about said fat tosser relying upon her disgusting use of her disability card, it's hardly surprising that me and indeed, the rest of the contributants would choose to have "issues" about fatness.

The deliberateness that some seem to comment without understanding is bizarre and that it's the combination of self-harming and using the outcome of their self-harming that actually gets my goat.

Oh, lest I forget. Racism too

Why not? children have been playing outside for decades. Its healthy,

"I would have never got into this situation, because there would be no way on this earth that I would have left 2 children aged 6 and 7 unsupervised by an adult in the street to play !"

@somethingwitty82

Well said. I did see that comment too. Imagine being the poor child having to secretly meet up with his/her friends away from the controlling gaze of a paranoid parent. Sends a shiver down my spine.

It's quite cute how you are talking to youself AitchGee/SomethingWitty/itslife etc, but surely your getting a bit bored now?

Nothing wrong with children playing outside at all but the children are 6 and 7 playing in the street 100 yards from their house unsupervised by an adult.

70 children were abducted by strangers in 2002-03 The average age of the victim was 10; about half were girls.

403 children were the victims of ?unsuccessful? abductions by strangers

11 per cent of children say that they have had an ?unwanted sexual encounter? before the age of 12.

11,646 children aged under 14 were involved in traffic accidents in 2005-06

Child abductions and attempted abductions in England and Wales have risen in the past year by 45 per cent to a record 846 offences, police figures indicate. More than half of the cases involved abduction by strangers,

Sources: Home Office, Healthcare Commission

Demo - we can't live our lives scared about what might happen, imo. Children should be able to play out perfectly safely. What's the alternative?

Things do happen though! My daughters 8 year old classmate was abducted and murdered while out playing.

IMO. Children that age should not be left unsupervised in the road to play.

I have a garden front and back we had half the children in the street coming in to play at that age or I took mine to a park, if the kids were riding their bikes on the path/road they were watched by an adult just for the reasons of safety.

How awful, Demo. I can see why you are careful.