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Did I make the right decision cancelling our date ??? Advice needed please!

29 replies

tetti · 30/04/2011 14:09

I am really dithering at the moment, (and this pmt doesn't help!lol)

Have been talking to a guy on a social networking site.Very attractive,professional single dad.However,something made the alarm bells ring when I spoke to him the other day.
1.He told me (a natural blonde) that I would look better in dark hair (is that really something you come out with if you haven't met someone?)
2.He went through my friends list,name by name,and asked who my ex's were
3.He did the same thing again,only going through the females on my list,then stating who he thought were attractive

Hmmm...He was intent that we'd go out clubbing and dancing on our first date...I hate both,I got all the clubbing out of my system when before I became a mum and although I do love music,I am one of those rare people who actually cannot dance,think David Brent but worse,it just ain't my thing.he was still intent on doing that "We just go to a place where they dance and you WILL dance by the end of the night"
He said that he'd never been married but maybe it'll happen soon as he'd be meeting me,then he went onto discuss future dates,how nice it'd be to get to know my daughter etc etc,you know,jumping the gun just a bit!

Am I over reacting in thinking that this guy may be a bit pushy (wanting his way),controlling (telling me I'd look better in dark hair,ie;already wanting to change my appearance) and jealous (going through every guy on my friends list "Oh,he is a goodlooking bloke,he's your ex?What about that one then,you must fancy him though!"

Some friends DO say I am over reacting a bit BUT,I spent 12 years of my life with a very controlling man and I would never want to be in that situation again.What do you think,was I right going with my gut instinct and turning him down or am I just over reacting?

OP posts:
SpringchickenGoldBrass · 01/05/2011 21:54

Don't worry too much about the 'smaller pool' thing - as we get older, we get fussier. Dating when you're young is not that big a deal, because you're not generally looking for a lifetime commitment and if the bloke turns out to be a bit of a knob you can just dump and move on.

flippinada · 02/05/2011 10:42

I've just read your OP and based purely on that you were right to cancel the date. Lots of red flags right there..but I'm sure several posters have already told you that!

ninah · 02/05/2011 15:20

yeah good call, fecking nutter

happenedagain · 03/05/2011 20:03

You really did the right thing, you have obv learnt from past experiences and thats really good.

He sounds like a nutter...

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