Aren't we just kidding ourselves...

[Toastiewoastie]

...to think we can find a good man and hold on to a relationship?

I have finally come to the conclusion that I am better off single, and I know for a fact that I am happier this way than I have ever been in any relationship.

I like my space. I am not a tidy person, and I am not a great cook. I am very overweight and can't imagine anyone desiring me. I am nice, kind and generous, but I am not very funny and I can be quite intense. I know lots of women far more witty and pretty than me who are unable to find a decent man, what hope have I? I seem to have ended up in the crappiest relationships with narcissistic, selfish, lazy men.

I know intellectially that love only causes me pain. I want to be free, so why do I keep craving to be tied down?

Life is good. I have no need of a man. I can do what I like, when I like and how I like. When I qualify as a teacher, I will be able to work anywhere I can find work. If I was in a relationship I wouldn't have this freedom. I have my DS, so I have had the experiece of mother hood at least. So why is it that I feel like I am grieving, then?

Beeandson How old is your son?
I remember one of my DC making up things about a 'hypothetical' dad at about primary age.
We had a bit of a game about it eventually, this HD was a war hero (sadly deceased), a spy deep undercover in an important surveillance mission, an astronaut on a space station etc.
Not sure how healthy it all was tbh but it certainly cheered DC up at the time. Ultimately tho DCs are realists and if you can talk neutrally (no guiltiness/emotional upset) with your DC I'm sure you'd both feel better. Try having a few questions in mind, ask one then stay quiet and just listen. If no response then just leave it and try again in a week or two. Some of my best coversations with DSs are in the car.
Your DC might be picking up on your yearnings for a P and building it into more than it is?