Are you living overseas and pregnant? Anyone interested in starting an international Ante-natal club?

[RubiMama]

I thought it would be fun to have a thread for those of us who are pregnant and living outside UK. As people's experience of ante natal care and birth can be so different abroad I thought it would be nice to our own MN antenatalclub. Where I am (Greece) there are no ante antal goups as such where women get together and all birth preparation is mainly on a one to one basis which I find frustrating. But there are other aspects of the care I get that I really like and in a way glad to be here rather than UK. Also I know it can be daunting giving birth for the first time in a new country where the whole system turns out to be so different from how you expected, so we could support each other and share experiences and stories.
I'm 26 weeks pg with DC2. Due at beginning of May.

Is anybody else in?

Hi there, I got the results back today - very low risk at 1:5648, so I finally feel that I can relax and enjoy the pregnancy and tell people now.

Phew!

Great news, Ozziegirly.

Hi Rubimama

Can I join the thread? I'm 25 weeks, due at the end of May with my second. DC1 was born in the UK. I was lucky to have a straightforward pregnancy and birth and had no issues with my care on NHS.

This time round, I'm in Adelaide too (waves to fellow Adelaidean Ozziegirly). Unlike Ozziegirly I'm going the public route and have opted for Midwifery Group Practice care, which means I'm under the care of two midwives, one of whom will deliver the baby (unless any complications arise then I will switch to Obs care). So far am v. impressed with level of care and most of my appointments so far have been home visits, which has been really helpful with a toddler in tow! Public hospital here has a good reputation and is just down the road from where we live. I've been offered choice of a home birth but think I will probably go to the hospital as it's so close anyway.

Congratulations to everyone on their pregnancies and good luck!

Hello everyone, I'm in! I'm in rural Oklahoma, 24 wks pg with DC3 (my first to be born in the USA).

I have a nice OBGYN, who will be at the birth, and I also have a fab doula. But I'm scared stiff that the birth will be a great big intervention-fest, as they seem to be very common here. I had to have a special meeting with the head of obstetrics to be 'excused' from labouring on my back in stirrups when my time comes. I still have one or two battles to fight, I reckon.

Rubimama the 2pm rule sounds familiar too - my doula offered to volunteer at the hospital here in the evenings and weekends, but was told not to bother as almost all babies are born from Mon-Thurs during office hours... (Fridays must be golf days)

But on the positive side, I'll have a lovely private room, and the hospital menu looks pretty good

at having to ask to be "excused" from labouring on your back, poguemahone! Great that you have a doula on board though.

Hello, COusinit and PogueMahone, I've just updated the list to add you to it.

Though it's occured to me that if we do the list by weeks pg, we will have to update it every week e.g. I will be 18 weeks tomorrow, not 17...

Maybe we should do it by due date instead?

Mmmango Thailand, popped, dd2 13 wks, Congratulations!
FlyingCloud France, 40 weeks.
Rubimama Athens, 27 weeks.
CousinIt, Adelaide, 25 weeks
PoguMahone, Oklahoma, 24 weeks
WhatSheSaid NZ, 17 weeks.
Ozziegirly, Adelaide, 11 weeks.
JeMeSouviens Canada, 10 weeks.
ActicFox Hong Kong, 9 weeks.
Roan Dubai, 7 weeks.
LaRagazzaInglese Italy?! ttc, good luck

Hey Cousinit, fellow Adelaidian. How are you finding the heat? I am hoping we will get some rain tonight and clouds are building, so fingers' crossed...

I'm impressed with the pregnancy care out here. We would happily have gone the public route, but we had private healthcare anyway to avoid the medicare surcharge, and mine covers birth stuff, so we thought we may as well use it.

Hi Ozziegirly, yes, it's been another scorcher today hasn't it? I must admit I'm not great in the heat, especially now that I'm getting bigger... would be lovely to get a downpour tonight.

We don't have private healthcare (we're only here a year so wasn't really an option for us) but the public system seems better than the UK so far.

I think you gave me some advice on Adelaide when I posted a question ages ago about whether to try for a baby over here...well, we decided to go for it! Congratulations on your pregnancy and test results. It's such a relief when everything comes back fine and you can start to enjoy the pregnancy.

Hello All, and welcome poguemahone and CousinIt . Agree with WhatSheSaid about due dates. Let's all post our due dates and we'll remake list. Shall we also say whether we're exp DC1 or 2 etc?
Mine will be DC2 due 6th May.
Great news about your test results Ozziegirly hope you've been sleeping better!
poguemahone I'm sure you'll enjoy your private room . Even though I moaned all though first pregnancy about not having a community midwife and other things I thought I was missing out on on NHS, after having my own room in the birth centre with DS and a bed for DH to sleep in all week I couldn't imagine it any other way. I was appalled to hear that my friends in UK had to trudge to a canteen on a different floor in their pj's to go and eat breakfast, urgh! Make the most of it! Will your other DC's be allowed to visit? Were their births straightforwad? If so, I'm sure you'll get through without all the interventions if you trust your doc and Doula.
JeMeSouviens I can see why you're having peiodic freak outs about your situation it does sound quite extreme. But on the upside, you're bound to be the only labouring woman they have to care for and so eveyone will be be doing their best to make sure you get the best care. There'll be no being left on your own for hours in case it's a busy night on the ward and so on. Is there the option of hiring a doula or private midwife to attend birth? Or can you opt to just deliver the baby at the other town that is 45 mins away?

I have to go now, DS has been slowly destroying a pad of paper while I've been typing this! I'll check in soon xx

Take care all, I'll check in again soon.

Hello ladies - I'd love to join this thread if possible. I'm 33 weeks pregnant with baby number 1 and due to give birth in Romania. I'm very nervous about the whole thing, especially as we live 1.5 hours away from the hospital and the traffic in Bucharest is a nightmare.

90% of the births here are done by c-section (more women choose them) but I am hoping for a natural birth. My Dr tells me this is fine, but I've been warned that once you reach week 36 most Dr's start suggesting you 'might need' a section and by the time you deliver that's what you have. I'm annoyed with myself as I'm now almost considering one as I wonder how many natural births they actually do - if 90% are sections maybe I'm a fool to try and have a natural delivery if they are so geared up for sections.

I feel much better after reading all your posts and know that plenty of other women are having babies in places that are a little out of their comfort zone!

Hello Kekke, welcome aboard and congratulations on your pregnancy . I can so understand your anxiety about the norm where you are living being so different from what your ideal would be. For me it didn't help that I hated living in Athens and wasn't working, so pregnancy and the build up to the birth was my absolute focus. Anything that was different from how it would have been back home just confounded my desire to fight for the birth I wanted. Well I got it, by seeking out a birth centre and delivering a 9lb baby after a 50 hour labour and nearly 5 hours of active pushing! I certainly felt proud of myself, but also decided that never could I do it again! This time I am going with the flow and am quite keen to sample the drugs on offer . I just want my baby to come safe into my arms and to be able to go home and enjoy her.
I was so worried about people controlling the birth and me resenting how it panned out, but in the end I realise I would have felt much safer and more supported if someone had intervened and managed things a bit more rather than just letting nature take it's very long course!
I don't think you should be annoyed with yourself for considering c-section. It's clearly what they do best! FWIW, although I get annoyed with the system here and the assumption that birth is something to be controlled by the doctors, I do think there can be some benefits. I have many friends in the UK who have had long labours, with failed ventouse, forceps etc and ended up having emergency c-sections and feeling disapponted by their experience; whereas friends here who have been told they will need to have a planned c- section have had a much more positive experience in the main because it was something they could prepare for and they came to terms with it more easily and even enjoyed. Sorry if TMI but hope some of this ramble helps!

Kekke, eeeek, 90% c sections. I have no problem with them - dd was emergency c/s and this baby will probably be an elective c/s - but wow, that is high! I don't know what I would do in your situation but I guess there is no harm in trying for a vb if you are keen, though it does sound like they will jump in and suggest a c/s at some point anyway!

Just had my scan - it's PROBABLY a...

...girl!

She was only 90% sure though.

All measurements etc looking good

Hi all

Gosh, it's so interesting reading about the different approaches in each country...

My due date for DC2 has changed a few times but we're going with 27th May.

Hello Everyone,

I am wondering if I can join this thread even though I am not pregnant... I am TTC my first in Hong Kong and would love to hear about everyone's experiences.

Artic Fox, I would love to ask you a few questions about who you have chosen for your Obs as I have been researching into them and would be interested to hear your experiences.

Thanks and good luck with it all!

Sure- fire away, or if you'd prefer, send me a CAM message.

In a nutshell, I am seeing Lucy Lord at Central Medical Practice. Chose her based on personal recommendations from a couple of Brit friends. If you look on the local expat forums there is no consensus at all on the HK obs (for every person who likes someone, there is someone else who hated them). I chose LL as she is pro natural birth and has a no nonsense approach which I like. Also, her practice is in Central which is more convenient for me than Wan Chai (which is where Sally Ferguson- the other fave Obs for the Brit expats works)

One thing to consider is where you want to deliver (I know- it's ridiculous to have to think about this so early, but because more mainlanders are having their babies in HK you have to be booked in at 9 weeks to stand a chance of getting into the Matilda and the Adventist is also quite hard to get into albeit not quite so cut throat). Some Obs have more sway with these hospitals than others so it's worth considering before you choose your ob. If you see Dr Ghosh you are guaranteed the Matilda as he is the resident obs. Apparently Dr Lord and Dr Cheung (her partner) always get their patients into the Matilda as well as they do 33% of the deliveries up there.

On the other hand, if you want to deliver in a government hospital, some obs (incl LL and Grace Cheung) won't deliver there because historically they've had issues with communication etc.

So, the approach I would take is to decide which hospital you'd like to deliver at and work backwards to an obstetrician. Check your insurance policy and also give them a call to confirm what they'll pay for (most will pay lump sum per pregnancy and you can decide how to split that between prenatal, delivery etc). Can choose to top up if you want to. Remember that as well as paying the hospital fees for delivery you need to pay for your Obs to attend the delivery (I missed this out on my first calc) and the anaethetist if you need an epidural.

Ok, that's probably enough for now but feel free to ask any other questions

Wow- Thanks Arctic I tried to send you a CAM message but it said that you had not enabled them on your profile.

That is great info. I had looked on the local expat forums and seen the same situation as you describe so it was not too useful.

I have decided that I like the Matilda and had already thought about Lucy Lord so it's great to hear that you are using her. It seems strange to be thinking about these things when I am not even pregnant but like you said I've heard that you need to get the ball rolling asap to ensure you get the hospital that you want. Have you chosen the Matilda?

The other question I had seems like a bit of a silly one but it has been bugging me for a while. When you find out you are pregnant do you need to see your regular doctor to get a referral/confirm the pregnancy like in the UK or do you just call the obs office and make an appointment?

The cost is a big factor at the minute too as my employer provides healthcare insurance for me which does not cover pregnancy costs. I have just called them and asked if there is a top up option I could add on to my insurance and they said no. I'm just waiting for them to call me back now as they were going to check whether their personal insurance branch offers a maternity top up option. Who are you insured with and is it a general health insurance package or a specific maternity one?

Thank you so much for helping me out with all of these questions!

Hope your pregnancy is going smoothly so far sounds like you are really being looked after!

Join the girl club WhatSheSaid! . Congrats. I was told at 12 weeks that mine was probably girl and I didn't even ask! I didn't really believe it but once they had planted the idea I had to find out for sure at 20 weeks. Really excited now I'll have one of each.
Hi and welcome FelicityFlick, good luck TTC!

No need to see GP- once you find out you're pregnant just make an appointment to see the obstetrician of your choice. I called up when I was 5 weeks, expecting to be told to call back in a few weeks but she did want to see me immediately (although tbh in retrospect I would prob wait until 7 weeks- they cant send the hospital form off till eeks so there's plenty of time)

My insurance is with AXA but it's through my husband's work (and he ticked the maternity add on as we were TTC at the time- quite amazing foresight by him, and most out of character).However, it doesnt cover everything.

I think LL does a "package" for people without insurance who want to deliver at the Matilda. To prove you are poor enough you have to book into the shared ward, but it is quite a discount on the "pay everything individually" route.

Btw- have now enabled CAM so you shd be able to message me if you want.

sorry "eeks" should have read "9 weeks"

Rubimama, wow, I didn't know you could find out the sex at 12 weeks, even if it was just a "probably".

Nor did I! That's why I DIDN'T walk in saying, "we don't wanna know!" I didn't believe it, but turned out to be true. Last time though, was told at 17 weeks that DS was a girl, and his manboyhood was diagnosed at 20 weeks!

Hi Everyone,

Can I join? We're TTC, but just started, I only came off the pill after 7 years at Christmas.

We live in Botswana. We've been here 2 years, and are just about to extend for probably another couple of years.

Medical care here is ok. It's supposed to fine if everything goes smoothly, but as soon as there's any complications it becomes a big problem. That applies to everything, not just childbirth.

If you look likely to have any complications then they suggest you go down to South Africa as the hospitals there are really good - first heart transplant etc.

But I think we'll probably go home. It'll be our first DC, and i think we'll want our families around. Does anyone have any advice about that - how does it work to have almost your entire pregnancy overseas and then go to the UK in month 8. How do you find a midwife and fit into 'the system' etc?

There aren't any antinatal classes here or anything like that, so I'm pretty nervous about the whole thing.

Good luck everyone! And this forum is a great idea - thanks

Hello Canoe, welcome aboard. There seem to be quite a few people TTC who have posted on here so far. Fingers crossed for you.
I have no experience of going home and fitting into the system, only know of a dutch friend of mine who went back to Holland a couple of months before the birth and stayed a couple of months after. I shouldn't think it's a problem. I would think the main consideation is the latest point they allow you to fly. General limit is not after 6 or 7 months I believe, but DH's boss was recently flying round Europe 8 months pregnant - I think she had to give written confirmation to the airline that she accepted full responsibility were she to go into labour or something along those lines. So I'm sure it can be done.

I'm having the same wobble, canoe!

I don't wanna give birth here but it's a 10 hour flight plus another hour, transfer in either Paris or Mauritius, and DH won't be able to have 3 months off....

Having done wholesale relocations with a newborn though I would advise not taking/getting much in the UK that you have to bring back!