**German Chat**everyone welcome* - macht es euch gemütlich

[ZZZen]

reden wir weiter...

Actually, I told a man off this week for parking in the mother&baby space in the Waitrose car park when he clearly didn't have a baby with him. So I am at it too I don't feel bad about it though

Things are great here, Frosch, thanks for asking. We get enough sleep (just), DD2 is a happy little thing and loves staring at her mobile - which is what she's doing right now, hence me on MN! She also managed to escape the chicken pox, hurrah.

Little Froeschlein alright?

It's what I would have expected you to do tbh Schulte.

:-P

Little Froeschlein is fine, thanks Schulte. Good on you re Waitrose mother and baby, that's just ignorant. Oh, I miss Waitrose. And baby trolleys for kindersitz. Here, I have to plonk the seat in the trolley and pile up the shopping around her until all you see is tiny pink dummy sticking out of a pile of fruit, veg and fishfingers...

good on you frosch!! you'll be the auslander not to be messed with now!!

ernest - if i'd have been in the UK i'd have complained but i think rules are rules here and you might have a fight on oyur hands!!! take frosch with you! the 2 of you sound like you need to let off some steam!

my MIL is one of these people who thinks its ok to give their opinion even when its not needed! ILs had all 3 kids at the weekend and she brought them back full of ways to manage ds2!! i do know he's a little shit but her ways were no better than mine! just made me pissed off that with the insinuation that i was a crap mother! thats what those elderly ladies in the street are doing - they insinuate they are so much better mothers than us young ones!! moan moan!!

Then again, you hardly see where you're going with the car seat on top of the trolley... I've shopped with DD2 in the car seat, and DD1 stood in the trolley, and she invariably ends up stepping on the eggs and breaking them! Deliveries are the way forward methinks...

must get OFF the pc. It is dh's birthday tomorrow and I should be doing stuff.

I am reading about Michael Jackson. Is everyone devastated by his death? I was never a fan of his really, I don't think I would ever have gone to a concert or bought his music but I watched a re-run of an old interview with him and really he seems to have had a miserable childhood and never got over it. I feel a bit sorry for him really but I don't feel bereft. Maybe I'm missing something though. I know a Spanish friend of mine (rock guitarist) swears MJ is a genius. I don't really get why though.

Hmm still trying to figure it out (beats cleaning)

I don't get the MJ thing either.

I'm glad I'm not the only one. I feel like I am missing something that is blindling obvious to the rest of the world. Not just that I don't get the Macken - the pale skin, the facial operations and his dc wearing masks etc. I mean I don't really appreciate his music so much.

What on earth did our parents do? No child-friendly trolleys, no kindersitz in cars, not even seatbelts, no Cbebbies, no mother-and-child parking.... they must have had it tough.

Deliveries ARE they way forward but it ain't gonna happen here. We've only just gotten round to celebrating extended hours at our local HIT - 8.00 p.m.! Wow! And I don't think people will pay five euros for delivery. That would be OUTRAGEOUS.

I've got to clean as well, so I'm off too...

Frosch well done. blimey, you sound like you're at the end of your tether You must be unlucky, not 1 person tried to pass on any pearly of wisdom to me with dd, though I remember a particularly memeorable old lady after I'd been in CH five minutes stopping me in a very wet & autumnal street telling me that ds was crying because he was suffocating and couldn't breath under his rain cover . Presumably if I didn'r have the rain cover on she would have had a go at me about him catching his death cos I'd let him get wet....

our local (small) edeka has trollies with baby seats. this not normal?

ok, just had meeting with ds2 teacher. She was very nice but basically, ds2 is being a pain in the arse, disruptive, naughty etc. He has ADHD and clearly he is in full flow.... Sometimes he's a lot better, sometimes not. Now is not, apparently..... I am so gutted for him that he cannot control himself. Everyday, someone calls round for ds1 and they go off without him. Several times, including today, someone calls round for him after school. Now he has got a birthday party invite. Just like at the last school where he had dozens of invites and ds2 got none Shit I am so upset and worried about him.

Frosch I absolutely HATE it when someone parks at "Mother and baby" in Rewe when I want to go there and they are alone. I give them a hard stare if I see them.

Dirndl man - shout at them. Go on, you know you want to

You have mother & baby spaces??!!

Technically, are you allowed to use them

I don't know ernest, hear so much about this syndrome now, seems so widespread and someone was telling me the other week it may be to do with all the additives in food. Well maybe.

A mother I knew from dd's 2nd kiga told me her son was diagnosed with it and she was giving him some kind of medication. He is a lovely friendly boy whenever I see him, seems pleasant and balanced to me so I don't really know what the issue is. Is it a problem with concentration?

We tried medication, be it didn't have a huge impact on his behaviour, but it did make him very tearful and depressed, so we stopped. He went through a long period of being a lot calmer, but we think having had so many changes has just pushed him over the edge.

He does lack concentration, but that's the least of his problems. He winds people up or annoys them but he often doesn't realise he is being annoying, he has no impulse control (well, very poor) so he really cannot stop himself from doing something even if we tell him not too. Mil used to cal him 'one more time xxx' and apparently just like dh was. it's like an irrisistable urge or tick, he just can't stop it. He is basically a pain in the arse I'm sure for teachers and pupils alike. I feel so sad for him, because when he is more calm and under control he is charming, funny, sharp, witty, very clever and adorable. At the moment he is wild and v. difficult to handle, and really causing him social problems. Very similar to dh. I might have to seek medical advice again, though I was told before they won't do anything within 6 months of a major life change

Mother and baby spaces? Hmm I just sneak on them.....

Ernest if it's additives in food do you feed enough organic to the kids? Why don't you try an organic box scheme like "Hofgut Letten" who deliver boxes of veg to your door? I used to do this and will consider it again this winter when the fresh garden stuff dries up. We're just starting to harvest our allotment stuff now. I will get sick of lettuce end of summer.

I think he just needs a good long break ernest, lots of being outdoors running about. It may not solve the school problem next year but would be the best thing for him for now I think. Was he ok getting on with people at kiga, did the problem start with school?

I am not convinced this syndrome truly exists, everyone whose dc has a problem at school gets diagnosed with it these days (seems to me). He has been moved around a fair bit for such a young dc unavoidably of course. Some dc cope better with it than others. I never had a problem with moving home/school but my brother did. Was it this boy who was being bullied at the IS?

I know taipo said on a school thread, her ds' teacher had told her he hand ADHS and I am not sure what she has done about it, haven't seen her for a while. Could you ask her if she is around?

Ernest are you getting cabin fever like the kids at the moment? We've never had this amount of rain in Bayern ever. Mine are on the ceiling these days.

You may not be able to change him too much but if its possible try to take breaks yourself. I am the biggest hypocrite here regarding exercise but I've just lugged my body one hour on a mountain bike through muddy fields and I think I can cope with the Crazies better this afternoon.

"I am not convinced this syndrome truly exists, everyone whose dc has a problem at school gets diagnosed with it these days (seems to me)." don't say that Zzzen not for ds2 anyway, I agree it does seem to be bandied around quite a lot, but not here! He has had this problem for a long time, way before school, way before kg. He started KG at 5 . There he would also annoy the other kids, but not be aware of it, even with big clue like 'hör auf' but he also go on well there and enjoyed it.

At swimming lessons, all the kids would be lined up - 20 kids in a line and he would be the only one hopping about, pulling silly faces, fiddling with the hair of the kid in front etc etc the only child week after week, every week. He is notciably different and stands out in every group of children and always has, even since very young. He was not in trouble once at either his swiss school or IS, it's not all all the case of him being naughty so the teacher slapping the label on him. We sought help to try and support him as it has long since been very clear that he experiences a lot of challenges in dealing with daily situations that other kids just don't have. And sure, all the moves and disruption haven't helped. But they are also by no means the cause - this started a long time before the disruption he has experienced, they have perhaps exaccerbated and highlighted his problems.

He has so far got on very well at school. He had a great relationship with his 2 absolutely excellent teachers in CH who both understood his needs and dealt with him well. He is, when not being totally bonkers, very very clever and also charming and sunny. Luckily starting IS seems to coincide with a calm lull. for the last few months he has got more and more bonkers. tarted at Christmas, dramatic change. Don't know why. Absolutely bonkers.

Btw, it was his brother, ds1, who was being bullied in the IS. Ds1 seems to be Mr popularity and has settled in brilliantly. I know ds2 doesn't cope so well with change, and yes, am hoping that the summer break will really help him.

Man, will take a closer look at his diet, thanks for that.

I see the problem ernest. Really don't know how you can tackle it if it is basically who he is rather than some condition which can be assessed and handled. I can imagine regular organised schooling will always be something he will find difficult to slot into then.

Is he lonely, does he seem to suffer through noticing his behaviour annoys other dc or is he ok in his skin?

It's always worth having a good look at diet though, isn't it? I'm not sure what ADHS is supposed to be, s it nerves?

When you read the list of ingredients contained in some of the ordinary every day foods you eat (which you don't count as junk from the word go), it is astonishing how much rubbish they contain. And unnecessarily too it seems. Like why do they need to make fake cheese? Don't we have mountains of waste dairy produce burnt every year in the EU, so why are they selling cheese whihc is in fact not cheese at all? I find that very strange.

A friend of mine from Holland once gave me a book to read about the chemical additives (and other rot) whihc is in almost everything we eat. Then if you add to that the pollution we breathe, the recycled water we wash with and brush our teeth with, the shampoos, soaps, detergents, deoderants and cleaning material we are really poisoning ourselves.

I would like to change it drastically in my household but feel faint at where to begin and being a lazy cook, I often go back to processed ingredients and packaged sauces and rubbish like that.

i agree wrt all the chemicals - it's not just the food, but all the soaps air fresheners, washing powders etc sil sent me some clothes for dd recently. i was really struck by how perfumed they were - her whole room smellt strongly for several days, even with them being in a bag. I don't go in for air fresherners (open the bloody window fgs) and don't buy much processed food. I won't wear perfume and try to avoid chemicals as much as I can. The world has gone mad. and toxic.

I think ds2 is suffering a lot socially atm. He has always been v.v. close to ds1, to the point they choose not only to share a room, but also a bed every night. But now ds1 wants to go off with his friends and is v. popular at school and ds2 is finding it hard to be abandoned. His clumsy attempts at fitting in seem to have the opposite effect, of not amusing and endearing himself, but being annoying He really just doesn't 'get it'. though. and he can't snap himself out of it when he's on a roll. sigh.

ZZZ I was in that position several years ago.

I'started by planting half a dozen tomatoes in big pots on my south wall, and it mushroomed from there. I'd pick some autumn and the taste explosion in my mouth taught me that I had to get nore into it.

I wanted to grow my own veg when I saw Carol Klein doing a programme "Grow Your Own Veg" just before Gardeners World. That set me off with an ambition to dig up a chunk of our garden to grow stuff. Stuff like lettuce beans and leeks etc. The biggest problem was what to do with it all. Enter "Jamie At Home" the book I got for Christmas off SiL. Changed everything, also scrounging all my Mum's cookbooks was a great step.

Then last season I rented a plot called a "Sonnenacker" and ate out of it till Christmas. I scrounged SiL's old freezer and it was full of stuff.

This year's crop is now getting ready. I just went down with the kids and harvested Chcmomile (make tea tonight - DS has a cough), coriander (my first attempt at my own chicken tikka, and kohl rabi - gonna stuff them with tomato and onions.

I taught myself via the web pizza bases, bread making, stocks and sauces, and pastry. Unbelievably easy once you know the principles.

We make our own apple juice from our trees, have plums raspberries, blackcurrants (just made 7 jars of blck and apricot jam) and I grow herbs for food as well as medicinal use.

My main ports of call are now websites like Jamie At Home, River Cottage (big HFW fan) on C4, and "Grow Your Own Drugs" with James Wong on BBC2.

Once you've got into it your quality of health leaps forward and we were almost never ill last season.

I can give you websites/books if you want to check out.