Moving abroad with teenagers and declining uk political env

[Spacecow123]

I’ve been wanting to move abroad for a very long time, so long in fact that my kids are now teenagers 16 and 13. I’m now thinking should I just let the dream go or wait till the next point when my eldest is in university and youngest doing level? If we did move would they ultimately need to come back to the UK for uni anyway? I wouldn’t mind the Middle East, Singapore but I feel really stuck now that I didn’t do it earlier and it’s crunch time in terms of majors academic milestones. The declining political environment is also a major factor for me, I always thought the uk was a tolerant place to live but farrage and his cronies lied to us about brexit and now are doing the same thing with reform. Beggars belief, how do people forget so easily? What future will the next generation be living under?

Which countries do you have a visa and job opportunities?

Surely this is a joke?

This!

Great schools in Singapore but expensive. I would love to live there but don’t earn enough.

very good point

Generalising abit no? All those women working hard in the Middle East, starting business and providing for their families wouldn’t agree with you..
All those husbands approving requests for their wives to work, what has the world come to

I’m not saying that there aren’t women in the Middle East working hard. I’m saying that order to do that, they have to have permission from a male guardian (dad or husband).

I was asking if you’re comfortable with that. Because it applies to ex-pats too.

I think you would find that is a very small minority, especially among the expat community, and those that do require a local male sponsor.

do you have a partner? because sex outside of marriage can land you in jail.

What’s your way in, OP? You can’t just up and move to those countries you have mentioned. You have to have visas etc. What would Dubai and Singapore gain from having you as a resident?

Why have you waited til now to move overseas? One reason we made the move is that the kids were little and it wouldn’t affect their education. Maybe it would be better to wait until the children are done with university and making their own way in the world.

Don’t forget the people who come from poor countries to work in Dubai etc who are treated appallingly. If you have a problem with the attitudes of Reform supporters to foreigners, Op, wait until you see how people treat people from India, the Phillipines etc in the UAE.

Thanks Beekman. Both husband and I could get jobs within our sector. But the now or never drum is getting louder for me..
maybe the answer is to wait. Looking at threads most have done it when the kids were little as oppose to with teens. Just trying to get perspective with expats who have actual experiencing of moving and all it entails as oppose to armchair critics

Many of us ‘armchair critics’ actually know what we’re talking about. But you don’t seem to want to hear about the negatives.
My sister in law needed permission from her husband to work when they lived in the ME. Some basic research will show you that is still common practice.
My lesbian friend has to pretend to be straight when she travels there on business.

That is the reality of what you’re considering.

Well , everything else aside I would think about whether you want the youngest to be back for university & well worth reading the rules re fees. But others have said this already. Other than that your choice. It wouldn't be for me , but I am not you 😊

Indeed, plus Singapore isn't exactly a bastion of freedom, democracy and inclusivity. Good luck being gay there.
It's strange to complain about Brexit, complain about the UK becoming less tolerant, yet decide to live and work somewhere with less tolerance.

It is much easier when they are little. There are U.K. style schools you can switch into eg Reston Dubai, Brighton college Singapore etc and lots of families in Dubai and Singapore (including lots of actual Singaporeans) send their children back to the uk for university. If you are very canny with how you do it eg are on a short term contract, keep a strong base in the UK etc it can sometimes be possible to keep home uni status for a few years but it isn’t easy so you would have to be prepared to be treated as an international applicant which has clear impact on cost and a range of differing impacts on accessibility - some courses and unis are easier to get into as an international, some harder.

another route is for the children to board in this country and keep a property here to use as their home address for ucas. Depends how you want to live and how much money you have (and after a certain point it is only worth wriggling to keep home status if aiming for Oxbridge, as the savings would be irrelevant).

But I am with the others in giggling about leaving the uk for ME because you crave political freedoms and liberal mores.

My dh has been looking to move for a while. He has decided to pause until dc3 has left school. We felt it wasn’t fair to disrupt the dc’s education during the exam years. We also considered the fact that they would no longer eligible for student loans. Some people did advise my dh that his potential salary in Dubai would mean the DCs wouldn’t need student loans but there’s always the possibility of dh being made redundant and we would have a real problem without student loans and having to pay international fees.
I am still struggling to understand why you want to leave the UK because of the rise of Reform but are ok with moving to authoritarian countries with terrible human rights records. If we moved, it would be to make some decent money before dh retired and we would have to grit our teeth about the regime. Honestly, I hate to see how people in the UAE look down on the people who have travelled there to take on hospitality, domestic service roles etc from third world countries. I speak with some knowledge because I know a lot of people who live there. Some say how awful the people are treated while some people say horrible things about eg the accents of Indian workers.

Exactly. I’ve a lot more respect for people saying they’re just doing it for money. I can kind of understand that even though I personally couldn’t overlook the injustices.

The university tuition fees should also be a serious consideration for the OP. I work at a university and have spoken to many families who thought they’d be okay only to find their child having to pay international fees up front.

It’s harder to move teens than smaller dc, it’s harder to get assessed for home fees for university in the UK and I don’t think possible to access student loans.
What do your dc think about the possibility? Would you be looking at an international school, they can be very expensive by the teenage years.

We were expats for 25 years, our children were born overseas and we lived in three different countries. Ds moved to the uk when he was 18 for university: no access to loans and international fees for his course (this is eight years ago) were £25k per year. He did get home fees as Dh’s contract stated that he was employed in the UK and on secondment in China.
Moving with younger children is fairly straightforward once schooling has been sorted, but don’t underestimate the cost of international schools and imo they can fall short of UK standards, despite the PR hype that their teachers are the best in the world!
We moved back to the UK when dd was 14 and this was more difficult as she had close friendship groups and started back in year 10, but some of the gcse content had been covered in year nine. Her school was brilliant in helping her to catch up, but dd did feel at little stressed when she started.
TLDR- I would not move teenagers overseas unless it was absolutely unavoidable.

Yes, that's absolutely fine! It's the hypocrisy, in this case.

You need to look into this carefully - had a friend who ended up having her English son be treated as an over seas student for uni fees as he had not been back in Uk ‘long enough’ to be considered a Uk resident or something like that

Goodbye!

What did you like about Singapore and the ME when you visited? Remember holidaying is very different to living there. I couldn't handle the heat in the ME

If you can’t handle ‘armchair critics’ pointing out the Middle East is not some socialist utopia, I don’t think the Middle East is for you…