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Help! DS in trouble in Canada. Any words of advice?

185 replies

DUTI · 11/05/2019 19:24

He's been an idiot. He knows it. He doesn't deny it.

He went out last night and got so drunk that he thought it would be a good idea to drive home. The Police spotted him and have done him for driving under the influence.

Is there anything he can do to mitigate things? He drives for a living so losing his licence is bad news.
Anybody got any wise words on the best way to approach this in Canada?

OP posts:
Justmuddlingalong · 11/05/2019 19:57

If he's old enough to go travelling, drive a car and get pissed, he's old enough to be grateful they're not picking bits of someone innocent from the underneath of his car. Having a mother trying to look for excuses for his behaviour says a lot tbh.

TwigTheWonderKid · 11/05/2019 19:58

We used to have a ridiculous practice here in the UK where you could plead that losing your licence would mean losing your job so they let you off. Anything similar over there?

I bloody well hope not, h needs to bloody well learn his lesson on this one.

He went out last night and got so drunk that he thought it would be a good idea to drive home. He could have killed someone and you're woried about him losing his job?!

Fairenuff · 11/05/2019 19:59

We used to have a ridiculous practice here in the UK where you could plead that losing your licence would mean losing your job so they let you off.

When, 40 year ago? I don't think you would be let off drunk driving in the UK these days.

How is he working if he's on a tourist visa?

DUTI · 11/05/2019 20:03

How is he working if he's on a tourist visa?
They are allowed to do very basic jobs.

OP posts:
WallisFrizz · 11/05/2019 20:05

How about you teach him to face the consequences of his actions...?

Fairenuff · 11/05/2019 20:08

He is supposed to pay a fine to the Police. I have told him to hang fire for a bit, in case paying the fine is an admission of culpability that he cannot row back from.

Ok. Firstly, there is no point in trying to avoid an admission of guilt. What is he going to do, plead not guilty against a positive test? He will lose.

I'm assuming he can't afford a lawyer so if he were my ds, I would say pay the fine and hope that he doesn't go to prison. If he loses his licence or gets deported that would surely be preferable.

00100001 · 11/05/2019 20:08

there's not much to be doen really?

he might end up with a fine and sent on his way, and he can call it a lesson.
or he might end up with a conviction, lose his job and get sent back to the UK - either way, lesson learned - and he won't do it again (we hope!)

silly man.

lucky he didn't kill anyone, otherwise he would have been in a LOT of trouble or dead.

NorthEndGal · 11/05/2019 20:09

It will depend what his Blood Alcohol Level was, if it is his first time, did he cooperate, etc
Was it a three day suspension?

turnaroundbrighteyes · 11/05/2019 20:10

We used to have a ridiculous practice here in the UK where you could plead that losing your licence would mean losing your job so they let you off.

When, 40 year ago? I don't think you would be let off drunk driving in the UK these dayys

Exactly, losing your licence is a given nowadays in the UK, plus whatever the Judge wants to add to that.

FurrySlipperBoots · 11/05/2019 20:13

What a stupid bloody twat. Presumably he always knew he was going to drink-drive or he wouldn't have had his vehicle there anyway! I'm glad he realises what a freaking idiot he's been, and you aren't getting him home in a body bag.

As for advice, I would tell him to take it on the chin and learn from it.

Fairenuff · 11/05/2019 20:14

It might also depend which state he is in. Have you googled the penalties OP? What did it say.

DUTI · 11/05/2019 20:17

It will depend what his Blood Alcohol Level was
he doesn't know. Just knows that it was a 'fail'
if it is his first time
he has had a blameless driving history until now
did he cooperate
yes
Was it a three day suspension?
They have taken his licence, for 90 days I think.

OP posts:
SolitudeAtAltitude · 11/05/2019 20:19

I have never heard of a legal system where paying a penalty is an admission of guilt Confused

If anything, NOT paying the fine may mean they escalate things. Ever tried not paying a fine in the UK? It escalates pretty quickly!

Fairenuff · 11/05/2019 20:19

Sounds like it's a fine and a 90 day ban then. He's very lucky. Tell him to pay it.

DUTI · 11/05/2019 20:20

Presumably he always knew he was going to drink-drive or he wouldn't have had his vehicle there anyway!
It wasn't his car. They have a Boris Bike type system there.

OP posts:
saturdayhelpme · 11/05/2019 20:25

Honestly, and I know this is hard to hear OP, he broke the law, he drove drunk and could very well have injured or possibly killed someone. I don't think you should be looking to help him out, only selfish idiots drive drunk.

I hope he's deported! If I was his GF I'd be severely disappointed and probably leave him.

FuzzyLilac · 11/05/2019 20:26

He drove while under the influence. He should accept the penalty for it.
Stop trying to help him get out of it Hmm

NicoAndTheNiners · 11/05/2019 20:27

Was he drink driving a cycle?

PCohle · 11/05/2019 20:31

You need to get him proper legal advice OP.

MN is (rightly) not going to be sympathetic to your son and it is important that he properly understands the ramifications of the decisions he makes from here.

Dvg · 11/05/2019 20:41

As someone who's friend died to a drunk driver, he deserves jail. Fuck fines.

SD1978 · 11/05/2019 20:47

I (somewhat) get what you're saying- but not having a go at him is different from what you're posting which is trying to get him out of it. He was drunk, and drove. Luckily all that happened was he was caught. He should feel bad, and he has let everyone- including you down, and not sure why you're trying to trivialise that. He is guilty and should be punished, end of. Pay the fine, take the consequences and be grateful no one died.

Nandocushion · 11/05/2019 21:08

There's no way around the 90 day ban, unless he can get himself an expensive hotshot lawyer and go to court and somehow manage to throw doubt on the test result. I assume that's not possible. His visa might be revoked because of this so I'd have him check that. BC is very very tough on drunk driving.

SirVixofVixHall · 11/05/2019 21:37

I agree with everyone. This is not the time to go all out to help get your young man out of trouble. This is a time when he needs to be in trouble to feel how serious it is. Drunk drivers can, and do, kill people. He has had the good luck not to have done that. That is all the good luck he should get now. Otherwise he might do it again, and find his luck has run out.

SirVixofVixHall · 11/05/2019 21:38

Also, if this was my child, I would be going nuclear at their utter stupidity and selfish carelessness.

SirVixofVixHall · 11/05/2019 21:41

I had a friend who drove when drunk. He is an ex friend. Not because I dropped him, because he died. He was in his twenties, lovely girlfriend, his adored dog in the car who somehow survived the crash. He didn’t injure anyone else thank the Lord.

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