Moving abroad with 8 year old. Silly idea?

[MrsS1990]

Hi I'm 26 years old, single, work part time and I have a lovely 8 year old little boy. Over this last year Id say I've had a pretty tough time emotionally, but it's made me realise I'm not living the life I want to life. If I was on my own, I would just not give anything a second thought and I'd go. But my number one priority is my son.

I have next to no savings. Don't drive. Have a job I am really unhappy in and for many years now I've been wanting To move overseas- Spain or France.

Now the problem is, I'd have no idea where to start.
Is this possible. Are people like me able to just up and move to another country?

Any advice or stories would be very welcome

I think you need a concrete plan rather than a vague idea. What work can you do, what languages can you speak, what sort of lifestyle are you looking for?

BTW I did it when I was young, free and single but I think with a child to support you need to be a bit more organised than I was!

That's the problem with the concrete plan - have no idea where to start planning it.

I have no skills really, not on paper. Except ten years working in retail in the same store!
I don't speak any language other than the general Spanish phrases. Looking to see if anyone like me has ever moved overseas.

My main worries .... only worries really.... are schooling, a job. And a place to live. Pretty big things really

Not speaking the language is a big obstacle to getting a job (could you start learning now?) Brexit is also possibly going to make things harder for you.

Just make sure you're running towards something, and not away from anything. Your troubles won't respect geographic boundaries.

Does anyone else have PR for your dc? You can't leave the country if they do.

Also freedom of movement doesn't mean you can move anywhere without being able to support yourself so you will definitely need to save up first - moving abroad is costly!

Sorry- meant to put "without their permission" in there

What do you mean by 'anyone like me', OP? What kind of life do you want? A city, the countryside, a village, the coast? What's your ideal job? How much work/research/savings/language learning/exploratory trips are you prepared to put in before you go? Have you spent much time in France or Spain?

Allegretto- I spoke with someone today who says lots of places in Spain have English speaking schools and towns where other brits have moved to. I'm not sure how much truth there is in that?
I could learn ....and my son could also.

Smitff- defo not running away from anything as such. I have a family which I get on with ok, and my sons dad is extremely supportive. I'm just not 'happy' with what I'm doing and have been doing for a while.

How costly are we talking

I used to live in the south of Spain, and met plenty of lone mothers in a similar sort of situation to you who were taking a year or two 'out', mostly WWOOFing.

Mostly they weren't planning a permanent move, just to have a great experience for the family & HEing their dc rather than putting them into local schools.

Its a few years back but certainly at least then there were plenty of English speaking wwoof hosts in Spain, and plenty willing to welcome someone with a child providing they were flexible about volunteering (ie, happy to do some shared childcare with hosts children!) I suspect France would be very much the same.

Its the sort of thing you could even do for a couple of months to dip your toe in the water (eg by taking your dc out of school a wee bit early at the end of the summer term).

I don't have up to date costs but off the top of my head, you would probably be paying a few months rent as a deposit, healthcare insurance and moving costs for a start.

Should say back then it would also have been easy enough to move down to the south of Spain on the tourist coasts and pick up bar work / put your ds into a local school (where they would have been one of many, many children coming in with no Spanish). These days sadly post-crisis I very much doubt it would be do-able.

I really wouldn't do anything drastic (do you have to sell up in the UK?) until we know a bit more about Brexit. You might not have the right to move to the EU, who knows?

I rent. So no ties regarding that. I have absolutely nothing here that is mine.

I'm the opposite to allegretto. If it weren't for Brexit - and if your ds were a bit younger - I'd say the ideal thing would be to work/save as hard as humanly possible for a year or two and try to learn to drive, come up with enough ££s to buy a van, and learn some more Spanish (or whatever language).

In the circs, plus with a ds who'll be rapidly approaching secondary age I'd be inclined to go for it, but in the knowledge that it's likely to be a temporary thing that hopefully will break the cycle of being 'stuck' and give you a new vision / approach to life.

I've moved abroad twice, but to a high skilled job.

Costs wise, you'll probably need several months rent, both for the deposit and because in many countries you'll have to pay rent up front because you don't have a job. Look carefully where you're going, many cities have formal or informal limits on rent/salary ratios, so you might struggle to get housing. You'll also need up to a few hundred a month for health insurance depending on country. You'll then need a bit to open a bank account, maybe 100 or so to get each of you registered in the system, food, furniture etc. The language classes are generally around 30 euros per hour and you'll need at least 2 hours per week for probably a year to start to get fluent enough for a serious job. They can be less if you find a student, but the quality is normally lower.

Something you might look at is getting some child care qualifications and going as a nanny/housekeeper/advanced au pair type thing to an English speaking family or one who wants their kids to learn English.

The other option might be to go as a student! If you don't have a degree, a lot of places do them much cheaper than the uk and in English. Some might even give you a bursary and you should be able to get a loan. That would be more likely in a Scandinavian country than in France or Spain though.

Sorry but with no languages, no money and Brexit I think you would be crazy to move. If any one of those obstacles were removed then it might be possible.

Laungauge barrier might make you feel isolated. Brexit might cause big headaches. What about somewhere beachy in the UK? I quite fancy Cornwall myself..

I'm not sure what area your friend was referring to but the only English language schools I know of are international schools, and therefore fee paying. That said the state schools are used to children coming in with no Spanish and some are good at accommodating them, but this can vary.
Jobs are still hard to come by, my emails regularly feature jobs as carers/kitchen/bar work in the UK. In touristy areas you may find work in bars/restaurants where the clientele are British, but these tend to be found through word of mouth and would involve child care costs for you. Most customer facing roles ask for a minimum of two languages, with a third being preferred. One area where being a native English speaker is an advantage is as a language teacher, so perhaps you could look at doing a TEFL qualification, also I've had friend who have worked in the international schools with very basic Spanish.
A previous poster poster mentioned health care, this is something you need to research carefully as the rules in Spain changed in 2012.
Look on a site like Kyero for rental prices, but remember that the more touristy the area, the higher the prices, also the average wage for retail/reception type work is somewhere between 850- 1000€ a month.
I hope I haven't been too negative and the above only applies to Spain, can't help with any French questions. Sorry

I don't know what sort of lifestyle change you're looking for, OP, but a completely different suggestion (and forgive me if it's way off the wall). Have you thought about community living in the UK?

Again its the sort of thing where people tend to visit and volunteer first, sometimes through WWOOF, sometimes directly, but for a lot of people without much in the way of resources it's a way to have a very different kind of life for them / their children.

Diggers and Dreamers is a website listing some of the communities in the UK, it's a bit old fashioned now but if you poke about there's lots of info on there.

Do you have any qualifications? If you have a degree you can get a well paid job teaching English in Spain or as a teaching assistant in a bilingual school, most state schools have to be bilingual now. You don't need any spanish for this. Rent will be cheaper in less touristy cities. The north coast is lovely and much cheaper than the south. Gijon, Andoain, Santander, Santiago are all lovely. You do need a plan. X

I have no degree....
Reading this does seem like I'm just going to have to dream about it