Oh holy crap DH might have a job in NY, starting next month...

[topsmart]

So we recently had a fantastic childfree few days in manhattan for his 40th, what a brilliant place we enthused... he gets chatting to a pal and before you know it we're into second interviews for a job over there. No decision from the company until next week but my head is spinning. What do I need to know before he starts negotiations?
We have 2 DD, age 4 & 10 (youngest due to start reception in September). What salary would he need to earn for us to rent in Brooklyn? What's even a good bit of Brooklyn to live in?
We've done a Big Move before, from London to Manchester, and couldn't have coped without help from the mumsnet hive mind, so am seeking whatever guidance or pointers you have!
Currently looking at my dishevelled house in despair, how on earth will I get it rent-able...
And I'll have to resign from work.
And I'll have to step down as President of my WI...
Excited! And scared! Help!

It's £170k
But we've no idea what that covers yet nor how much he'll be taxed, so sounds AMAZEBALLS to me but could end up nuppence
Agent is now beginning negotiations ... which will probably go on for days...I shall just sit here and boke nervously ...
First world problems etc etc etc

Just be aware that what sounds a lot, isn't necessarily a lot when you're living in the Tri-State. For example, my property taxes (kind of like council taxes) are well in excess of $20k a year. Anywhere that has a good school district are going to have pretty high taxes. Although if you're renting, the taxes are included in your rent.

Great Neck is lovely but OMG! Long Island traffic would send me insane!

Congratulations and good luck!

Flipping heck, $20k? Where does that money go, to local authorities? What other outlays might we need to take into account? Going to try some rapid calculations tonight
(And thanks v much!)

I think a good ballpark estimate is 40% tax. Plus try and find out what (if any) your health insurance costs are going to be. It's rare for employers to cover 100% of the premiums, it's typically something like a 70 (employer) / 30 (employee) split collected through the pay check. Your first car insurance if you're thinking of getting a car will make your eyes water (your UK no claims discount is meaningless) and remember you'll have no credit rating at first so expect to pay a lot of securities and upfront payments on things like rent, utilities etc. Then there's just so much incidental expenditure in the first few months getting set up and established. Buying TVs, small electrical items that you didn't bring from the UK, cell phones etc. The first few months you're just on a complete spending frenzy!

Is that $170k or £170k?

We are in Silicon Valley and I can tell you that whilst that sounds like a huge salary really isn't. The would be a basic salary here and would cover living expenses, but that would be it. There wouldn't be much left over for holidays, etc out of that.

That would also not take into account schools, clubs, etc

Fabulous that he's had an offer though - did they say what sort of visa they would try for? I suspect on that salary it won't be O1, but I might be wrong.

How exciting !

Re car insurance, try State Farms, the do take your UK no claims into account.

If you have an AMEX card and have had it for more than 12 months (I think it is), then you can open one in the US quite easily, as they will take your credit history over for that.

Credit is a nightmare - we went with a credit union as banks didn't want to touch us without any history.

You will need to apply for a SSN as soon as you arrive, and can literally nothing else until that arrives. Then you can sort out bank account, driving licences, etc.

OMG Topsmart! That is hugely exciting! Is it all very hush hush?

You can try this calculator smartasset.com/taxes/new-york-tax-calculator#DoPtYvz8nt

To add to what BritInUS1 and Want2B said, be prepared for some culture shock, language and nuances are totally different. By far the biggest shock for me was office culture - it's like night and day to the UK. I previously worked for a British foundation in NY, and now work for a US university, and after a year, I'm still getting used to being in a US institution and am still regularly surprised by the differences.

I lived in and around NYC for many years. Personally I would never live in NJ, for all kinds of reasons. If you'd like to be near the city but not in it, try the lower Hudson Valley. It's beautiful, and places like Yonkers and Hastings-on-Hudson are half an hour or less by direct train into midtown Manhattan. Brooklyn is brilliant, but so expensive - Brooklyn Heights and Park Slope are now every bit as pricey as nice parts of Manhattan. Ditmas Park is brilliant, but when we looked there (years ago) there wasn't a good way to commute into midtown. You could also look at Carroll Gardens or Cobble Hill.

Just lost my post FFS

Bottom line: do your sums very carefully. Cost of living in US is very expensive. You'll need deep pockets to have a nice lifestyle in NYC. We were in your position a little while ago and turned it down because we'd have been so much worse off. See also cost of education (saving for college - and if your children want to come back here to study they'll have to pay as though they were overseas students), employment at will, healthcare costs. I won't say the rest because this seems more of a cheery happy thread than a cold hard reality one!

Well I'm clearly already shit at sums kim as I quoted the salary in pounds and it's $170k dollars. Having used that awesome tax calculator (thanks BritInUS!) I can now start to see what you all mean about needing deep pockets... and fox you shut your lovely mouth, no telling in real life despite the abundant identity-identifying info I've scattered about!

Ok on $170k they need to pay housing or at least a big bonus so you make well over $200k.

To give you an idea, here in Hoboken average family income is about $300k. With you not working $170k won't go far. Its enough for certain suburbs but not the ones with top school districts.

With that income you need to consider suburban areas. I would try to get into a top NJ school district and compromise on the housing. Make do with an apartment instead of a house in towns such as Millburn, Summit or Westfield. I'd also look at renting in cranford NJ. Your money will go a heck of a lot further in cranford.

Despite my earlier post, I'm going to go against the no-sayers and say $170k with only 2 kids is absolutely fine. No, you probably won't be able to live in Manhattan or Brooklyn, especially if you are sending your kids to public (ie State) school, but there are a gazillion and one places you could live that would give you a great experience and you could afford.

I personally think the commute from Millburn and Summit is life suckingly depressing, despite the fact the towns themselves being lovely, so somewhere out there would be up for your DH to decide if he could face doing that twice a day. The Westchester County river towns would give your DH an easy commute, and have a great lifestyle, restaurants and amenities. Take a look at Dobbs Ferry, Tarrytown (check the school allocation of properties there), Ardsley, Hastings on Hudson. If your DH is prepared to suck up the travel time, Pleasantville is lovely, has a great vibe and great schools. Also, Armonk. Your DH would need to commute to White Plains North and then drive the last 15 minutes so he would need a car. You could also take a look at Croton-on-Hudson.

I'm not going to lie, you're not going to live excessively on $170k. My eldest was 10 when we moved here and it's the little things that REALLY add up. DS used to go to soccer club in the UK (obviously it was called football club though!) and it cost us about 10 pound a week. Here we pay about anything from $300 to $1k, depending on competition level, for a season (ie spring, winter, autumn, not a soccer season). Your youngest won't be old enough for Kindergarten so you'll have to pay for his pre-K program. And then OBVIOUSLY, you have to suck up your health insurance. We have great insurance but it still cost us $2000 when DS broke his leg and $1500 when the school sent one of my kids to A&E because they thought he'd broken his leg and he'd only twisted his ankle....and another $500 for the ambulance they sent him in! not bitter at all

Anyway, I feel like I'm going on a bit now! Feel free to PM me if you want any more local info.

And, Want2Be, OMG! There is no way in a million years you spend $1000 on grocery shopping unless you're literally burning money as you go through the supermarket. I have teenagers and don't spend more than $250-300 a week, and it only gets that high when I shop more at Whole Foods than Trader Joe's.

And Hoboken has an average income of $154, 000, according to their own statistics. Which would make sense as everyone I know who lives in Hoboken (and I know quite a few) are police, nurses or singles and just got together couples under the age of 30.

So, yes, OP. You could also look at Hoboken!

Mmm, not all the info on here is up to date - NY and surrounds have pre-K programs that are free. If you do end up with very high (2k + 1.5k etc as in the post above) medical bills, you can deduct them off your (US) taxes. I shop for me, DH and 2 DCs and like the other poster I have absolutely no idea how you could spend 1k a week on groceries (did the person mean a month?) I spend about 250 week on everything and in a combo of Trader Joe/WholeFoods/Costco. In terms of where you choose to rent, think about how long you might be there. DH could perhaps be ok with a Summit, NJ commute for a couple of years but not for life (agree with other poster, Summit lovely, so are most of the places people have mentioned, OP you need a reconnaissance trip because only you know what will resonate with you and your family).... I think 170/USD is do-able, esp. because one of you will be at home so you have time do things like pack lunches and seek out bargains. I hate the high taxes (city, state, fed and don't forget sales tax) now that Trump is in because of, well, all the obvious reasons. But in general, congrats, good luck, and google everything to make sure you are getting the most up to date and correct information. PM me if you want any more.

Also, forgot to say, post on the expats forum too - lots of us here in the US and many in the tristate area.

Eh?! He only twisted his ankle 6 months ago and it wasn't deductible at all!

Cripes my head is now swimming with names of towns I've never heard of! Eek. We'll be there 1.5 - 2 yrs max, so I was imagining a 2 bed flat in some big block with a playground... proper city experiences. That would be do-able in manhattan wouldn't it? No interest in moving out of the city right now - if we were there longer, then absolutely, but we want the city experience and to be near DHs work.

Having said all that, we're waiting for news of agent discussions with the company and in meantime we had crappy news last night from DHs friend. This friend is supposed to be going to same company (which is a new branch of an existing overseas firm) as the boss but they've been offered a low deal. We thought they were a cert and are part of our reason for taking the post... so it may be that everything is off! Feel like I just want to lie down in a dark room.

You know what Topsmart it's good to have even considered it - it gives you a sense of perspective and if anything comes up again in the future you know you're open to it. Maybe it's the start of putting feelers out, seeing what else is around ... this could just be an open mind and the opportunities that can bring.

Exciting times regardless. Who knows what is round the corner for you?

makeitstip I said $1000 a month.

Rents in Hoboken are high. A 3 bed rental unit starts at about $4k a month for a place that is suitable for children. Truthfully friends in the back end of town rent a 2 bed for a great deal pay $3800, other friends in the same building pay $4200 for similar sized 2bed unit. You also don't know Hoboken if you are looking at the stats. The town has undergone huge gentrification. Those stats include those in section 8 housing, of which there are quite a few. It also includes those who bought decades ago and have tiny mortgages. If you dont pay current housing costs you can afford Hoboken on a heck of a lot less. However salaries here are high and households are dual income. During my leave it shocked me how few SAHPs are here. Ironically the SAHPs that I met who were not on leave were all men.

Also, my elder two have teachers who live in Hoboken. One is moving out. They purchased in the 90s when prices were very low and are moving up the hill as they need more space. The other lives in a rental studio owned by a parent. She told me she pays reduced rent. She also works on Sunday's to afford Hoboken.

It's really expensive here for kids activities. Swimming was $140 for 4 or 5 lessons. PreK is free but you are not guaranteed a space as the program fills up. It's an issue being worked on but registration for this year has already taken place and they used a lottery to distribute places. Last year there were about 100 kids on the wait list.

We lived in Manhattan many years ago for the same timescale as you are envisaging OP - if you can afford the rent on a 2 bed flat in the city somewhere then that's going to offer you the most interesting experience than elsewhere. It really comes down to the sums. Wishing you best of luck PS My 2 DDs were 3 and 7 when we lived there (but we were also glad to come home at the end!)

Awww thanks guys. It's heartening to hear that our idea could be do-able.

fox cheers love, you're right, it has definitely woken me up to being open to other potential moves, when I had previously felt very settled and unwilling to shift! Also made me realise how much we need to get in order (eg dilapidated house) before any changes could be considered. Better buck my ideas up and get organised in case anything else arises! I'll keep you all posted on developments...

With health insurance my previous employer has just switched to only high deductible plans. The cost to the family in premiums for the year are $10k and the max spend is $6k on an individual basis and $20k as a family. This is the same as what DHs employer offers.

New employer pays 100% of the premium and employees only pay the deductible, which is $2k a year.

I've posted this to show how health insurance varies. You will probably be offered the former rather than the latter. On $170k you need to be setting aside at least 10% in savings. They should also be looking at a visa that will enable you to work. Employers like NYU and Columbia have excellent benefits that more than make up for the lower salaries that they offer. Personally I think NYU pays very well if you look at the whole package offered. The discounted tuition alone is worth a fortune.