Living the Dream

[pupsiecola]

Lots of posts lately about not. Just wanted to hear from anyone who feels the move was a positive experience , with no plans to return to the UK. Can you add where you are please?

Thanks...

Hi, I'm in Australia, Perth, only been here for 9 months but for us it's been wholly positive and we're expecting to be here permanently.

We sold up in the UK before we left and have now bought our own place here. We were extremely lucky and landed jobs within days of landing which definitely helped make the move less stressful. The kids absolutely love their new school, joined a soccer team straight away which helped them make friends and settle really quickly.

I know there's some negativity about Perth on here, but personally I (and rest of family) love it, we've got a much better lifestyle here than we ever had back in the UK. But if sun is shining I'm happy, and I love the heat, the hotter the better. Winter was worse than I was expecting in terms of the weather, but now spring is here and we're back to spending all weekend at the beach I would say we're definitely living the dream.

We have loved our move to Asia - we do expect to move back but only for family and not because we miss the rest of the lifestyle!

I notice that many of the postings here are very negative and certainly don't match the experiences of my expat friends in these countries (Australia is the worst!) I wonder if that is because people who come onto this very UK-based site tend to be the ones that haven't fully made the move in their heads, didn't totally want to move in the first place, or who haven't made strong connections in their new country to make up for missing people from home - the happy ones are probably on local equivalents and getting on with their new lives overseas.

We've been in the ME for 7 years, very happy. We will move when Ds goes to uni (Sept 2014) but to elsewhere in the ME or Asia.

Abu Dhabi here. Been here 14 months and loving it. Don't intend to go home at all. We visited in the summer and that just cemented what we already knew. The kids love it here. They can do so much more than if we lived in the UK. The house we live in would cost us around £1m to buy in the UK and around £3000 per month to rent. We used to live in a pokey end of terrace house. My littlest can ride his bike around the downstairs. We do sailing, horse riding, skiing, climbing, bowling to name but a few things.

It coming up to 10am and I have just finished a breakfast meeting, sat outside, over looking the sea one way and across to the F1 track and the marina with boats and yachts the other way. Drinking Austrian coffee and eating cake.

Living the dream!

We live in Sydney, been here nearly 5 years, love it! Loved it the moment we arrived and have never looked back!!!

We didn't go far! Only the Netherlands. Not a single regret. We have a lovely little house, the boys have a great school, the healthcare (which we have needed to use a fair old bit unfortunately) has been wonderful. We have our ups and downs but moving here has been good for us. Everyone's willingness to speak English has made us lazy grateful for our lack of Dutch. We have bought a house and have no plans to come back to the UK, especially as a branch of M&S Simply Food has opened a few km away

Some very positive stories. Keep 'em coming!!

When we moved to Asia last year we had no intention of coming back. We knew Asia would only be 2 years but then wanted to head elsewhere for good. DH arrived back for good last week and doesn't want to be here (in terms of generally living in the UK). He obviously wants to be where his family are and that's what he chose. In Asia he had a 10 minute bus commute that cost 60p. Yesterday he spent 5 hours commuting at a cost of 40 quid (to head office on the train via 2 changes - won't happen often). But that's just an example. I don't particularly want to be in the UK either hence thinking we will try living overseas again. But I appreciate nowhere is perfect -everywhere has issues. When abroad apart from a few friends there was nothing we missed. We're quite self sufficient and not particularly close to our families. We are so glad we sold our house and have no strong ties here but we almost feel like ex-pats in our own country as we are not quite diving into life here as we don't know how long it will be for...

It's great to hear these positive stories.

I agree with what you say Sunnysummer. Also I guess ppl post here for support when they need it, which is what I have certainly needed over the last year.

NSW Australia here after a hard first 2 years we are now 5 years in and no plans to return

Have to disagree with you sunnysummer. I have lived outside the UK for 20 out of the last 25 years.

I have always embraced the people,place and way of life, enjoying the experience.

I have done nothing different with this move, but find it almost impossible to make any headway.

I am not living an ex-pat lifestyle so always try and integrate into the community.

Sometimes it is that the person and place don't connect.

It is nice to hear that so many people are enjoying their move and living the dream though.

Yes madchocolate I agree with you re not connecting. That's defo a factor in settling (or not).

You're right madchocolate, I meant to counterbalance some of the very negative views of expat life you can find on here, but realise rereading that it sounds like I think that anyone who does not love their move is somehow fault, which is certainly not my view! Sometimes you and a new place just don't fit and sometimes the pull of home is much too strong for very good reasons.

Good to hear that so many are living the dream, and hope you find your own dream place soon!

We have been talking about moving and even though I love 'home' I am not 'homesick' for anything in particular.

If we end up in the UK again it will be though de-fault and not a deliberate choice which is the reason we are still here.

Having to work really hard to make a move work is very tiring and makes 'home' sound much more desirable than it actually is. Would not have moved in the fist place if everything was so hunky-dorey.

I would have loved this move to have been our last though. Believe me, I would love to write a happy, glowing account of my new life.

Unfortunately I have draining, complaining syndrome

I find that some people are VERY negative about the Netherlands and constantly compare this experience with the best of home. Some are just very homesick. DH and I didn't really live near friends and family in the UK so didn't miss it here. It does help that my hometown is only 5 hours away if you go on the euro tunnel from Calais.

The Dutch are known as quite unfriendly but I find the opposite - maybe because I am from south east England...

I didn't miss the UK until my son fell ill. Now we can't go (for a few months) I really want to! But then I always want to come back here to my lovely little house.

Sunny summer I agree completely!

Brisbane Australia. Been here 7 years now. Time has flown. Love it. But we moved here forever. Sold up in the uk. Moved lock stock dog n barrel! No regrets. Happy Aussie kids. Great house on acreage less than an hour to the Cbd.
Hate the hot humid days. But so does everyone! Not many of them.
Love warm mornings, leaving work after a late shift and not needing a jacket for many months! Yup. No complaints.

Loved my short time in Asia overall. But had to deal with a shockingly fast illness and death of a very close family member back home and a husband who had a mid life crises. Also many of my friends had relationship issues which of course might have happened back home but there is something about Asia that make many men grow a huge ego and act differently to how they do at home.

Thanks for starting this thread (and also thanks to the poster who started the 'Not LTD' thread). We're moving to the ME in the New Year (our first overseas move) and I am both scared and excited. It's been really valuable to read all your experiences, positive and negative.

We are new to Texas, arrived here in July. We're still settling in although the kids are really comfortable and thriving at (international) school here. We're still doing "new arrival" stuff like passing driving tests and I'm not keen on the first year anywhere. Life here is good, we have a lovely house with a garden and pool, the weather is fab (25c today and huge blue skies), people are friendly and helpful, you can get hold of anything (after a year in Azerbaijan on Red Cross tuna, this is a huge plus) and we live in a booming, optimistic city.

I do think that you need that first year to find your feet, then can take stock and start to feel comfortable, if you're ever going to. I realize that lots of people move to a country that doesn't suit them, or it might be that living overseas isn't for them, full stop. I'm lucky in that, in 10 moves over 17 years, I've enjoyed every one of them, worked in every single country (this is a huge help to settling in) and really tried to appreciate local culture for what it is. Our hardest move was Scotland in fact. It was a reverse culture shock, the uk wasn't how I remembered it in my rose tinted hindsight, my skills weren't specialist in the uk so I struggled to find a job at first but we settled eventually and it's one of the countries I miss now.

Why do Australians always say cbd? It's like a permanent geography lesson on settlement

I love living here, Chile, but am now concerned about my DDs potentialy marrying here for various reasons.

Abortion is absolutely outlawed, I would want DDs To have a choice if they bécame pregnant before they were ready for a family.

A woman can still be Stopped from leaving the country without her husband's or ex husband's permisión.

Marriage is still one sided despite recent changes in the law, he can clear out the bank accounts but she needs his permisión To access her bank account.

DH hasn't adapted Well, all his friends and asociates are other expats. I have local friends. A few expats too but mainly locals. But DH now wants To return To the UK.

Actually wrt setting, I hardly ever visit this board because I don't think of myself as 'living abroad'. Chile is home for me, been here ten years, DDs in a local school, and the original plan was To stay. So for me going back To the UK is a huge move which I'm willing To under take for the DD's benefit whereas DH sees it as 'going home'.

We moved to New Jersey, USA just over a year ago. I hadn't been keen on the move but it came up as an offer not to be refused and DH has always wanted to live here.
I've been amazed at how hard but also fun the experience has been - finding out how a different culture works is hard work but then also very rewarding. Also coming from the SE of England, like another poster, I found that people here are extremely friendly, open and welcoming compared to back home - I have as many friends here after one year as I had back in the UK after 40 years, but maybe that was because I was having to make an effort to be friendly here, or have no one to talk to .
We also have found that we get to do a lot more here than back at home - kayaking, white water rafting, skiing and ice skating in the winter. I had not realised that New Jersey was extremely beautiful. Its opened up my mind to the positive aspects of this country, which I had always had pretty negative preconceptions about. I still think its totally mental sometimes though.

We have lived in Hong Kong for 4+ years, and both my children were born here. I feel it's "as good as it gets", especially at our current life stage where I get a lot of help with the children and the house, so I've essentially side-swerved the stress/ exhaustion/relentlessness of the early years of parenthood. I've been lucky to find a great job with my former UK employer and we have a lot of lovely friends (this took time though -for the first couple of years I'd be seriously stressed if anyone left because it left a big dent in our social lives). In terms of how long we'll stay, we tend to play it by ear. However, realistically I think we'll stay overseas another 10 yrs, until DS starts secondary at 13 and Dh retires. However, that may involve another country or two in the meantime. I would love to live in Switzerland because I like rules, chocolate and skiing

We've been in Australia (Melbourne) for 7 years, and this is a permanent move. Coming out here in our early 50s meant no jobs in the UK for us now. This sounds negative, but that's not the intention; we were just being realistic about the odds right from the start. Did this mean we took settling down more seriously? Hard to tell.

We like it here very much; essentially the space and quiet, but still no end of bands/exhibitions/drama/films/festivals.

We've been fortunate in our work (full-time and decent pay) and where we live (naice suburb by the sea), so yes, we're happy.

Life is never a dream 24/7 though is it? (Sometimes my glass is half full but sometimes, it really is half empty!!)

I think you are a very clever lady Pupsie, and that you will make the next move decision carefully but also have the means to adjust that decision if it does not work. I admire you hugely for making the decision to move back and for keeping your marriage together in the process!! You are strong!

Research, research, research. Picture yourself, your life, your kids, work, your marriage, your short medium and long term relationships with other people and try to see what pitfalls could be in the way. Others would say, throw your bag over your shoulder and embrace the adventure - I do that, but only after planning and with a back up plan in my back pocket!

There are days that I have to remind myself of why we have made the choices we have, especially when they have unforeseen and unintended consequences. And there are other days when I leave the washing in a pile on the floor and take myself, my kids or the whole family and live the dream!!

The pluses here: weather, money, nature, outdoor sports, low population density, diversity of friends and acquaintances, freedom for me not to work but to be at home to make plaster of Paris ghosts and the most amazing pumpkin carvings with my kids.

Dreamy view, excitement, climate, fab wine & food, friendly, beautiful, nature (tho that can be hectic!). My list of positives. Overall not dream but then isn't that the point if dreams? Never realised.