Little old ladies in Germany

[SSSandy]

How do you manage these little old ladies? Berlin might be a special case. People from different parts of Germany always tell me that Berliners are very errr... let's say outspoken.

I do try to remember that they probably got bombed out in the war and worked as Trummerfrauen and had a really hard life etc. but they're a tough bunch, aren't they? I used to find it so annoying that they'd always be telling me how to bring up my child "she's too warmly dressed, she's isn't warmly dressed enough, don't let her eat in the street...". I tried to tell myself they were caring and showing an interest so it wouldn't get on my nerves too much but it did bug me.

Yesterday took the bus and sat dd down in the seat with a cross above it near the door (so meant for elderly/disabled). The bus was full and dd would have had to stand otherwise. So this old lady, she was sitting next to dd, told me off and said dd couldn't sit there, only someone with a disabled pass. I would have given up the seat if an elderly person had gotten on the bus. When the old lady got off, she stood in the door screaming at me over and over that dd couldn't sit there. What should I have done? Should I have made dd stand up in the bus and leave the seat empty?

(Have been LOLing at a lot of this btw )

frogs, are you in Russia nowadays? Tell us all about the babushkas ! Go on. I've been told you needn't worry about the skinheads and mafia in Russia, it's the babuskhas you have to really watch out for. They're legendary.

Jan I liked some of the phrasing "festering marital wounds" quite appealed to me. :)

FIT, Anglophile? Sometimes yes but often enough not, I've found. We get called "island apes" - Inselaffen for instance. Look out Cheeter! Mind you I only ever got called that once by a drunk in the UBahn when I was reading an English newspaper. Must get into driving a car here and avoid public transport!

This thread brings back memories (fond and otherwise). You must live near to where I used to live SSSandy, I used to live just off Ku'damm. I didn't have ds when I lived there so I was relatively unhassled by little old ladies, once I stopped crossing when the man was red. My friends with kids had plenty of comments though. We used to get stared at all the time as a mixed-race couple, not aggressively I don't think, just because we stood out. It took me a while to get used to it after living in London.

Oh pmsl at SSandy's KaDeWe? query. This actually happened to me years ago, where someone came up to me and barked "KaDeWe?" and I said helpfully "Ich? Nee, Ich bin nicht KaDeWe, Ich bin eine Frau. KaDeWe ist ein Laden."

I'd forgotten all about that incident until today

No, my Russian adventures were a while ago. Don't suppose the babuschkas have changed much though. Every metro station, ticket desk, and especially museums and galleries had a liberal scattering of thickly-dressed cylindrical old women, whose aim in life was to berate the public at large, and foreigners in particular. They made their German equivalents look like pussycats.

Think I'll just strike Moscow and St Pete off my list of possible destinations...

Caligula, did you really? I'll bet the person just gawped at you uncomprehendingly?

Ah yes, irony. So misunderstood, so undervalued. The reason why I could never permanently leave the UK.

But actually, although Brits like to think we don't do rigid rules in the same way, we do, they're just more subtle and amorphous. Try the following experiment: go into a crowded Post Office and jump a queue. Just push in. Go on, ignore the tuts. Or bump into someone and don't say sorry. Feeling embarrassed at the mere thought? Yup, that's what being English is all about.

Have you read Kate Fox's book on the English? It's a fab read for anyone confronted by cross-cultural misunderstandings on a regular basis.

I often compare Berlin to the south west swabian alp area where we used to live and there are lots of things that I prefer in Berlin as compared to the deep south, I would never want to go back there. People say the berliners are hard going but believe me you would run a mile if a gang of swabian grannys were coming your way!!
The public transport here in Berlin is great but expensive, up to now had no bad experiences. In the small town we used to live in the bus drivers definately get the prize for the most grumpy and unfriendly drivers I have ever seen! They use dto have fun driving off really quickly before you had got a hold on anything and you really had to pluck up courage if you had to ask them something.

Thank goodness they don't often run about in gangs, eh?

Good to see you admylin, have to dash off now, take dd to ballet. Take care!

Oh boy, is this thread giving me "horrible old lady flashbacks"...gotta go lie down....

LOL at this thread.

admylin - where did you used to live? I worked for a year in the middle of nowhere on the Alb: about halfway between Reutlingen and Sigmaringen.

i also am living in germany at mo, i have only been here 8 months and am still adjusting. i like it and would consider staying here permanently but i defo need to learn the language. i havent had any old lady moments yet but the one thing i have noticedis that in an empty car park you can park your car miles away from anyone else and a german will always park next to you, even though they have the whole car park to choose from, WHY? and IKEA, it seems to be a german day out, even when traffic is queing (sp?) to get in, they still go, where as us brits would say sod it and go when its quieter

I used to live in Vienna and was regularly berated by an old lady at the bus stop for not wearing tights, as I would catch a cold. It was August at the time.

Actually, I think the little old ladies are more of a Mitteleuropa thing than just German. I've been told off in Romania and Poland for not dressing my baby warmly enough. In the summer their babies are still wearing anoraks and hats, if not snow suits. Mine went out in a cotton dress or a vest.

@roisin - I used to live in a village near Rottenburg also near Tuebingen and we always went shopping in Reutlingen. I saw the worlds unfriendliest shop assistants in tuebingen though!
What did you do out there in the middle of no where?

There are quite a few places with bits of the wall still standing and you can also get tours where you go on a walk following th eold position of the wall. The checkpoint charlie also has a big bit of wall down the street with a load of info and photos to look at. I'm not sure where but there is also museum about the air lift that the americans did to feed Berlin (maybe google luftbrücke berlin) when the city was cut off from the reat of west.
My sister wrote to the germany embassy in London -online I think to say that she was planning a visit to Berlin and could they send any tourist info, she got a big A4 envelope full of useful info and maps and stuff sent to her, so worth a try , also she got all the info about the public transport, things to visit etc.

My ds was also very impressed with the 2 russian tanks on strasse 17 Juli just down from the Brandenburger gate, there are 2 canons too and a monument for the russian soldiers. Worth a look if you visit the brandenburger gate anyway.

The memorial (with a section of the wall still preserved, and a Chapel of Reconciliation) is at Bernauer Strasse (just up from the S-Bahnhof of the same name) - it also has a Dokumentationszentrum attached. The wall museum, as admylin (hi :) ) says, is at Checkpoint Charlie. The East Side Gallery, starting just opposite the Oberbaumbrücke (Kreuzberg/Friedrichshain), quite interesting to look at the different layers of painting since the wall came down, but it's not a nice walk, especially with a child.

\link{http://www.berlin.de/english/visitors/index.html\here's tourist info in English}

Hi ks,
This is it:
www.berlin-tourist-information.de/english/sightseeing/e_si_museen-detailseite.php?ID=5848

There are a lot of museums on the museum list on that site I've never been to - Zuckermuseum for instance. Quite like the MACHmit museum for children. Don't know how old your children are but they might enjoy that.

oops sorry FIT we must have posted at the same time!

I love this thread! And I rarely go to Germany. Such an insight into everyday life.

Can't comment on lil' ol ladies, but I work in a UK company with offices in Germany and other continental European offices. We know to expect that the Germans will be blunt and "grumpy" and ignore your urgent beseeching calls. They on the other hand will never understand why the English use a million words when we really mean "no".

I lived in the German-speaking bit of Switzerland for nearly 8 years. Four of those were spent blissfully unaware of what the populace (in particular, the wee Grannies) were saying. When I finally cottoned onto the language I was mortified. Their tuts and glares were accompanied by some fantastically rude comments. One, in particular, came from a woman who looked like the back-end of a car smash. Sitting down in the tram with my baby son (and speaking in English to him as well), one DOW (dreadful old woman) said to the other, "What an ugly child.", the other commented, "Well, look at the mother!". Cue my jaw dropping on the floor. I stared at them in astonishment and they looked at me as though butter wouldn't melt in their mouths. Witches.

Regimented? Oh, gosh...I remember an instance where I was helping someone clear up after a party. I put some empty glasses on a small side table so I could reach a napkin which had fallen under the sofa and the woman I was helping was shocked and said "But that table is for CLEAN glasses!". I thought, you MUST be kidding.

For all its faults, I am SO glad we came back to the UK. No wonder the suicide rate is so high in Switzerland. Life has the gusto of an undertaker's convention.

This thread is great - real lol stuff! It reminds me of a lot of the things I loved about Germany ( and some of the more, er..trying moments!)
I can def. recommend getting in touch with the german tourist board, I took dh and dd over last year to a couple of christmas markets, etc and the tourist board ( I contacted them through the website) sent reams of info, maps etc through the post - really good stuff.