WHERE'S BEST TO LIVE IN NZ AND WHAT DO WE NEED TO KNOW: PART4!!!

[AngryBeaver]

Arrgh,had to start a new thread!

Yes,you can get more land in Tauranga. Well,somewhere like Omokoroa or somewhere.Wouldn't want to live much closer than that. And I woulkdn't want to live at he Mount. Lovely as it is. Too touristy,imo.
We would like enough land for a pool (eventually) maybe a sleepout and still enough for a veggie patch and garden for kids. Don't neeed acres +. Wouldn't say no though,if we could afford it! Be nice to have a few sheep or something/

I think Mum would have to fly to Tauranga. So that would be
Manchester-London,London-Singapore, Singapore-Aukland,Aukland- Tauranga
Bad.

justa howws the back? Hope physio was a help,we may have driven past you!
Your house sounds great.
My mums friend lives in Silverdale.She has about an acre with some sheep etc
Wasn't overly impressed at but didn't give it a proper look I suppose,just stopped to buy flowers for Mums friend! Always worth another look

We didn't go trick or treating but went to our local library who were doing a spooky story time/ activities thing, it was good. The librarian as very dramatic, doing scary voices for all the stories.

How are you today AB? I know its obvious to say ( and hard to do) but I hope you're getting as much rest as you can while looking after the kids, dawn-to-dusk TV for them would be my recommendation! I know you still have to do school run etc. Thinking of you.

Oh AB I'm so, so sorry you are going through this , bloody unfair and heartbreaking. You are obviously a very private person but if you could perhaps accept practical help from people who are offering it you really should try to consider accepting - they want to help and if there ever was a time someone needed a hand its you, now. Massive hugs xx

Thanks everyone. kiwi that did make me smile, private person...who spills her guts about all on the internet!
Not feeling very well. In quite a lot of pain,dh just gone to work, upset that he has to leave me. And had a big strop because he is stressed and has man flu. Boys are tired and needy, I just want to curl up in a ball and be left alone. I can't get an appointment for a scan, bellyful hasn't rung me back...and dd has a pippinic (pippins) tonight

But you are right about accepting help. I find that quite difficult. Dh is the same. We had people offering to help us move and clean after the house was empty etc, but we just have a hard time saying "yes please", not sure why. I don't like to feel indebted to anyone. Even though that sounds awful and I know people don't feel that way. I know i don't feel that way when I offer to help. I love helping other people, it just seems I can't let them help me back.

I am very weird, I know

That sounds about right.

Oh that doesn't sound pleasant, poor thing. Hope he is better soon.
Bellyful has just rung, now we are just trying to work oout how to get some meals this way!
I have promised that when I am on the mend I will volunteer for their charity, as a thank you. She seemed pleased as she has no one in my area

That's a lovely thought AB. So good of you to offer. Hope you are doing ok today.

We went to a very low-key Halloween party at a classmate of DD1's. Was lovely - some food, kids played, did trick or treat at a few neighbours houses. Perfect. And then I was told by another unconnected friend that the invite was at such short notice that I should have refused. I'm so baffled by it I've actually just posted on AIBU in case I've been missing some unwritten rules of the school gate!

AB, I'm so sorry to hear your news.

Hope he is ok justa. If it helps ds1 was once ill for a very long time after a bug, it just kept coming back! He lost so much weight, I was beside myself. He was investigated for abdominal migraine, celiac disease etc The paeditrician wanted me to give him laxitives every day for 3 months to see if it was a constipation. I refused that little experiment!
As soon as we moved here he miraculously improved. People commented on how well he looked on fb. No idea what it was, or what made it better.
Anyway, I ramble, and I do not want to imply that your ds will be poorly for a long time! More that they can have something for quite a while,(whilst Mum is wringing her hands) and then just like that are perfectly well again!
Anyway, hopefuly he will not need a trip to hospital tonight.x
thanks kiwi I am currently drowning my sorrows with a large vodka. Keep rubbing my tummy and then remembering One day. One day, I'll have my newborn safely in my arms. I believe that.
So not looking forward to my mums face on skype tomorow. She makes me feel like a little girl in trouble. I know she's not happy that I got pregnant so soon after losing Hope.

vvviola saw your post in aibu. Your friend is very odd! Is she normally so self conscious? Don't let that worry you. You had a lovely time. That's all that matters! I am always free apart from Wed at 1.30 when I meet another mner for coffee!
i must be well sad does this face look bovered?

Just read your AIBU viola. friend sounds nuts!

Good luck talking to your mum AB. Not really her business what you choose to do but mums worry...

It's probably my fault. I have let her have too much of a say in what happens in a lot of aspects of my life, and relied on her too much in loads of ways.
Although dh thinks she is lovely, it drives him mad that she has so much sway over me. His parents are given short shrift if they dare to offer opinion on anything! He tells them nothing so they can't intefere. Might be sensible

AB I took until my late 30s (am 42) to realise that my Mum's opinion was JUST AN OPINION - and a flawed one, a lot of the time, at that. It's amazing how deep a mother's influence reaches down into every aspect of our psyche! My DH is like yours - despairs at how much her attitudes and values and opinions seem to matter to me, or used to, at least (I am more detached now). He sounds very much like your other half in that respect!
Agree that friend's comment was very odd vvviola - clearly says a lot about her, and nothing about you at all.
justa what a grim sitch with your poorly little one - keep us posted!
Going down to Pembrokeshire for the day now, to shut our caravan there up for the winter - looking fwd to a solo walk along the beach there to clear the cobwebs away. Love to you all xxx

aw, meerkate gisahug

Christ, poor little JJ.
No wonder dh wants to quit his job.. He has to trawl through all the details the public never see, and being a loving Dad, it kills him to hear what "people" are capable of. Utterly, utterly depressing.

Sorry, watching 1 News

Oh AB so so sorry. I really do hope you are OK. Bellyfull sounds like a fab charity.

the JJ case is very sad, unfortunately it's the kind of thing that lands on my desk at work quite a bit

Thanks shels.
I think some people are made of stern stuff when it comes to things like the JJ case. Dh is not. I am not. We arrived here as that awful case re the 5 year old in the caravan case was breaking. That was dh's first paper. DD was 5. And wewere renting a house in a "strange" counry.
Dh was very upset about it...and has been ever since. He often texts and tells me not to read/watch the news.

It happened just as much, more even, in England. The thing to remember that NZ has a small population and is geographically isolated. Stuff that you see in the papers here, would not always make it into the press in England. What you see in the press here is pretty much all of the serious offending in NZ, you don't get much left out. I remember being involved in very serious cases in the UK, that never scratched the surface of the press.

Just read that to dh and he said "that's what I'm saying!

I used to work for social services in the UK (not as a social worker) and I swear, it's been 11 years and I sometimes still dream about a few of the cases.

It's a symptom of our humanity that we are affected, and even when I find myself unwilling to read the newspaper, I try to remind myself that at least I still have that, am still able to feel that way for strangers.

Anyway, on a different note, the cash from our house sale finally came through so we are very very happy :-) DH and might even go to the movies to celebrate! Is the new James Bond any good?

The JJ case is very close to where we live and it makes me so sad. I go to classes for DD in the Orakei community centre few Maori attend. I wish the two communities were more integrated in this area.

We're home from the UK. Flights were okay but I've been up with DD since 2am.